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I don't want to eat alone so I don't eat at all

For the past three days I haven't been down to dinner in my uni halls because I haven't had anyone to go with. I've basically been living on snacks that I keep in my room. I'm v. hungry but I can't afford to spend money on extra meals. I know how ridiculous this is, but I had dinner alone once and was aware of the stares people were giving me and it made me so uncomfortable that I vowed never to do it again. What if I never manage to find anyone to eat dinner with though? Should I just bite the bullet and eat alone anyway despite it being such a humiliating experience? I know I shouldn't care what people think but trust me it is easier said than done.

Reply 1

Bubblebee

15

Take a book with you or an MP3 player so you have something else to concentrate on. I doubt anyone is looking down on you for eating alone.

Reply 2

dusk

wtf? I'm fairly sure they're not staring at you. Most people have higher things on their minds, such as eating!

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

I also hate eating alone , but please go! Just take a book or mobile phone or whatever. You can handle this!

Reply 4

louisedotcom

13

Like the person above me said, they arnt looking at you and thinking 'Oh my god look at them eating alone!' People really do have better things to do (well usually anyway)
Take and MP3 or something else, and you never know someone might come and sit with you.

Dont go hungry though, thats silly.

Reply 5

belle_27

14

Ok, I know this may sound daunting but maybe go and sit wth some people, introduce yourself and get talking. Say something along the lines of "Hi I'm blah, can I sit with you? I haven't seen you around, what course are you doing?" Something like that, just appear friendly and cheerful and they won't think you're weird (well they might initially but if you're just really cheery and nice then you should be fine) and you might make new friends. Or knock on some of the doors in your halls and see if people want to go down for supper.

Reply 6

tetrahydrocannabinol.

10

A magazine,mp3 player or book should help, as mentioned before. Also, I know this sounds cheesey, but confidence is like a muscle; you need to exercise it to make it stronger. If you just bite the bullet and go for it, it'll get easier for the next time you do it, and so on. Hope that helps!

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

You're right, they should have better things to think about than 'oh look, so and so is eating alone' but sadly that isn't the case as they were staring at me enough for me to notice it. :frown:

Reply 8

Llamaaa

15

use the opportunity to make new friends. Go down to dinner and talk to whoever is sat near you. It's a good way to meet people.

I understand where you are coming from though... :smile:

Reply 9

Anonymous #3

Alot of people say food in catered halls isn't particularly great anyway, although it seems a shame to waste food you have paid for, why not rab something to go like fruit or sandwitches etc, could you not fill in the gaps by goin into town with some other friends outside of halls, maybe for some pub grub or whatever?

Reply 10

dogtanian

16

I'd be surprised if they were staring as much as you think they were. I'm not saying you're deluded, but chances are, you were self conscious about eating alone before you walked into the room, so anytime people did look at you, and that happens, it was all you could concentrate on.

Bring revision or a book as suggested. It'll give you something to put your mind to so you won't notice others, and also on the flipside, people will see you doing something.

Reply 11

ro-ro

10

I think you should call on someone else in your halls or else chat to anyone in the hall. Not like anyone anyone but maybe in the queue say to someone Ooo I love pizza, don't you? Engage in great conversation then ask if they wanna sit with you. Obviously don't say pizza if it isn't pizza.

Or take an mp3 player and magazine like everyone else suggested, it sucks sitting alone but I spose everyone's got to do it sometime.

Reply 12

dogtanian

16

Anonymous

Alot of people say food in catered halls isn't particularly great anyway, although it seems a shame to waste food you have paid for, why not rab something to go like fruit or sandwitches etc, could you not fill in the gaps by goin into town with some other friends outside of halls, maybe for some pub grub or whatever?

Because eating out all the time instead of eating the halls food that's already been paid for is expensive?

Reply 13

jumpinglunch

13

hmm,i'v eaten alone a few times,it was alrite,i didn't notice any stares..And i somehow made new friends by chatting to other people that were eating alone.
its not something that worries me,and it shouldn't worry you.

Reply 14

Otarru

I highly doubt people just randomly decide to stare at you because you're eating alone. I mean, there are loads of people who eat alone. I think you're just being paranoid. Even if for some reason they are staring at you then they are not worth your bothering about. Only give importance to those who deserve it. Forget about it and just have a nice meal in the dining hall.

Reply 15

thegrassisgreenerontheotherside

13

Hey, don't worry if people are staring at you while you eat. Chances are they are not even looking at you! But don't worry about it. Like before, take something with you like a music player or something so at least you can do something while you eat and not just concentrate on what people are thinking. And be yourself. Why change something that is part of you just because of some other people's thoughts?
Hope you find an eating partner or partnerS soon!!

Reply 16

sparkler

11

can i ask what has changed so that you don't have anyone to eat with anymore? who did you eat with before these 3 days??

:smile:

Reply 17

Anonymous #1

OP

I used to eat with my corridor-mates for the first term, but then I moved rooms so I started eating with the people on my new corridor but they don't seem to consider me as part of their set so they don't tell me when they're all going down to dinner so I miss out.

Reply 18

All-American Reject

Anonymous

I used to eat with my corridor-mates for the first term, but then I moved rooms so I started eating with the people on my new corridor but they don't seem to consider me as part of their set so they don't tell me when they're all going down to dinner so I miss out.

Can you not go with your old corridor friends? Or maybe ask the new guys when they're going to be going, because you're feeling a bit left out. I'm sure they're not doing it on purpose :smile:

.

Reply 19

la fille danse

17

Why don't you just sit down next to some people you know? Then you won't be eating alone. How can you not know anyone in your hall?

I don't want to eat alone so I don't eat at all

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