I feel I am in a little bit of a dilemma and I would really like some advice!
I've been struggling with panic attacks and anxiety very badly for the last 8 months at work. I usually have very bad anxiety before work, sometimes I'll have a panic attack if I'm really dreading going. The anxiety carries on very badly throughout the day and often I'll have a panic attack at least 3 times a week.
I don't get panic attacks very often outside of work, the only other time I've had them is in very busy shopping centres. However I know that work is the cause of my anxiety, this is where it started and where it continues to happen. The people I work with are so nasty towards each other, everyone is always discussing how much they hate the work and the management are very rude and give no support. Being there I always feel on edge and most days I feel like I just cannot carry on any more, as much as I wish I could just quit, I know I can't.
Now my dilemma is, I've been looking for new jobs as like I have already mentioned, I believe that workplace is the main cause, I never suffered previously and I just want it to stop. I've got a couple of interviews coming up - I know I don't already have a new job to go to but I've been thinking... My team leader is also my best friend, she knows all about my anxiety and she will do whatever she can (management allowing) to help me. I've discussed leaving with her and she does not want me to go, but she has also said that she knows I need to do what is best for myself. My problem is that, if I leave and go somewhere else, will I just feel exactly the same? If that were to happen, I wouldn't have my team leaders support and that scares me quite a bit, that I would be totally on my own. But I could go somewhere else and be perfectly fine? I know I will probably never find the perfect job, where everyone is totally happy - but surely I can find somewhere better than where I am and be happy myself?
Has anyone else experienced anxiety in the same way that I have? If you have, I would love to hear your stories/advice as I don't know what to do!
Thank you all so much in advance.
Loughborough at number one