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    I'm 23, most of my life I have always been creative and wanted a job that involves creativity. I didn't do so well in school as I got bullied but after I left with some GCSEs I went to college and studied an art design course.
    I've always enjoyed sewing and crafts so it was here I decided I wanted to go into the fashion direction, like a small dressmaking and accessories business.
    After college I decided uni wasn't for me as there was no course I liked so decided in between working in customer service I would teach myself more about tailoring and garment construction and look for jobs.
    I had a few problems as my dad was ill for nearly two years and passed away so this took up a lot of my time as I was uninspired and didn't have time to do anything. It's been 2 years. I'm trying to find work as I am currently unemployed since June.
    My mum who was separated from my dad has never really been supportive, she's a nurse and just doesn't get creative jobs. She just cares about money even though she always complains about work.
    I can understand her frustration at me being 23 living at home and not having a solid career but her nagging at me telling me to change career are getting me down and makes me feel like I am useless.
    I don't ask for money from her, obviously I am living rent free but my brother who has a full time job and is older also lives rent free. I cook and clean and do the food shopping to compensate.I can't wait to move out but she constantly gets me down and makes me feel like I am not even good enough to follow my dreams which is probably why I am still stuck in this mess.She just wants me to work which is fair enough but I don't want to end up happy like her. I believe I am talented and can make garments and crafts. I would like to start selling stuff at markets I just need a simple job to get some cash which I'm looking for. she would rather take her dresses to a dressmaker to hem even though I am actually very good at it myself. She doesn't trust me although honestly I can really do it perfectly.
    I'm desperately looking for a job but can't find anything where I live or surrounding areas.I'm completely stuck in a rut, my mum makes me feel useless and uncomfortable doing what I love. I need advice please?
    I know to grammar is all over the place but wrote this in a rush so can be me clearer if people don't understand!
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    (Original post by Ava333)
    I can't wait to move out but she constantly gets me down and makes me feel like I am not even good enough to follow my dreams which is probably why I am still stuck in this mess.
    I suggest talking to her about how she's making you feel. If she's having this much of an impact, it's more or less necessary that you communicate with her.

    However, I do suggest that you refrain from putting all of the blame for your situation on her as you've done in the quoted text. Granted you've had a rough time, but so has she, most likely. Blaming her for being stuck in a rut is only likely to foster more resentment between the two of you and it's likely that you're at fault for some of your situation as well. Communication should help you identify what needs fixing and how to fix it.
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    So what you are "creative". No one cares because you can't do anything with it. Stop blaming your mum, to be frank, at 23 you should be doing something to bring in money and have enough to invest in whatever venture you have in mind.

    Get some solid skills that will get you paid and do you creative stuff on the side until you can make a go of it.
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    Try and give yourself - and your mum - a break and be kind to yourself - and your mum. You have all had a few tough years.

    I imagine that your mum is just trying to look out for you and wants you to do well and be secure. I think your plan of trying to get work is a good one; get something that can make you some money, and allow you to give your mum some money to pay some rent etc - and then try and find your feet creatively - try and find what you like to do and try and set up a little business on the side, eg Etsy or a market stall once a week or twice a month. Try and learn what you like and explore. Maybe do some short courses to build up some skills. Just explore and see what you like.

    Be nice to your mum, tell her you know she is concerned for you and just keep on doing your own thing. After a while, you will get a measure as to whether you think you might want to explore or this is something you might be able to earn a living from.

    Perhaps it is different actually doing creative work to earn money than it is for fun; you can just do it for fun, and do something else to earn money. But you are young and can explore.

    There might be something, also, that you can do with your mum, perhaps there might be some creative thing you can do together?

    This is something you will have to build up experience in; but you can do this. Make the most of the extensive network of craft bloggers/groups also . The problem of creativity v money is a constant in anyone's life - anyone who works in any arena of creative endeavour.

    You will not be able to see it - and why would you - but I do think your mum is just concerned; she wants you to be able to earn money; she worries that you won't be able to support yourself; try very hard to see it from her side, honestly, she only wants the best for you. Especially with your dad gone.

    But it's OK to make your own way in the world.

    I know you feel stuck now, but trust me; it won't always be like this. Get a job and then concentrate on in some way producing a small crafts sideline in some way. Be nice to your mum but stick to your guns. Don't worry that your mum won't let you sew her dresses. It's OK




    (Original post by Ava333)
    I'm 23, most of my life I have always been creative and wanted a job that involves creativity. I didn't do so well in school as I got bullied but after I left with some GCSEs I went to college and studied an art design course.
    I've always enjoyed sewing and crafts so it was here I decided I wanted to go into the fashion direction, like a small dressmaking and accessories business.
    After college I decided uni wasn't for me as there was no course I liked so decided in between working in customer service I would teach myself more about tailoring and garment construction and look for jobs.
    I had a few problems as my dad was ill for nearly two years and passed away so this took up a lot of my time as I was uninspired and didn't have time to do anything. It's been 2 years. I'm trying to find work as I am currently unemployed since June.
    My mum who was separated from my dad has never really been supportive, she's a nurse and just doesn't get creative jobs. She just cares about money even though she always complains about work.
    I can understand her frustration at me being 23 living at home and not having a solid career but her nagging at me telling me to change career are getting me down and makes me feel like I am useless.
    I don't ask for money from her, obviously I am living rent free but my brother who has a full time job and is older also lives rent free. I cook and clean and do the food shopping to compensate.I can't wait to move out but she constantly gets me down and makes me feel like I am not even good enough to follow my dreams which is probably why I am still stuck in this mess.She just wants me to work which is fair enough but I don't want to end up happy like her. I believe I am talented and can make garments and crafts. I would like to start selling stuff at markets I just need a simple job to get some cash which I'm looking for. she would rather take her dresses to a dressmaker to hem even though I am actually very good at it myself. She doesn't trust me although honestly I can really do it perfectly.
    I'm desperately looking for a job but can't find anything where I live or surrounding areas.I'm completely stuck in a rut, my mum makes me feel useless and uncomfortable doing what I love. I need advice please?
    I know to grammar is all over the place but wrote this in a rush so can be me clearer if people don't understand!
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    A creative job and/or course would be good. But perhaps for now it would be good to look for any job in the retail sector and look into part time courses in what you're interested in (fashion, arts, business etc.).
    Will provide you with both financial support, and development in terms of your current aims of having your own business in the creative sector (fashion).
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    You've been dealt a tough hand, and probably realise that you'd rather be happy than anything else. That's what I have. Do what you enjoy, but unfortunately that doesn't always give you enough to get by. Look for any kind of bearable job until you have the funds or another good venture comes along. Good luck.
 
 
 
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