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    I've been at my job for just over a month now (housekeeping in a hotel). I don't mind the work and generally I get on very well with the people there. However, one of the girls who I work with has been absolutely fine up until recently (I'd say the past two weeks) when I've noticed a sudden change in her behaviour towards me. There are only subtle things, but she is constantly criticising me unfairly (for mainly really petty things as well). We have to have rooms cleaned fairly quickly, but if I am working in a room with her she barges around deliberately quickly and then barks at me I'm not working quick enough before running off to the next one, even though I am trying my absolute hardest to keep up. Working in a fairly posh hotel means that the cleaning has to be thorough as well. She also boasts how quickly she can clean, how good she is at things, etc. which is very annoying, considering she has been there years longer.

    Sometimes if I am working with her alone, she completely ignores me on purpose and doesn't say a word. I find this very uncomfortable, but what is more baffling is that she used to be fine, but changed suddenly. I'm pretty shy/quiet at work and I've done absolutely nothing to her to warrant this behaviour towards me. I'm completely stumped. Tea breaks are horrible because we sit in silence on our phones and don't say a word. I tried making conversation the other day and she was mainly sarcastic/uninterested in her replies.

    She snaps at me for very little reason and another thing I've noticed is that I'm the only one she treats like this. The other day she snapped at me to 'use my head' just because I'd put some bags on the table and not left enough room; really little things like that. I'm assuming it's because I'm a 'newbie' still. She's not even in charge and has absolutely no authority, she's just another worker like me but has been there several years.

    I'll safely assume she doesn't like me, but I have no idea why. I'm not sure if this is really bullying, but it's starting to get me down and makes me feel miserable/nervous before going into work every day. I'm too much of a timid and nervous person to retaliate, and I'm too worried about mentioning anything to anyone else as it's likely to get back to her, and worsen the problem.

    Does this sound like subtle signs of bullying?
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    The hotel industry is full of people who are jumped up on their own ego. Some people have to be like that to survive i guess (notice how it's often the people who seem happy to stay working in the job for years to come). I'm making a generalised statement but I'm talking from years of experience so....

    There are multiple ways to deal with it. Talk to the offender (or try being mindlessly nice...if they see you as harmless a lot of cowards like this will calm down). Otherwise you could talk to your boss. If she makes your life there really miserable, rightly or wrongly i would consider looking for another job depending on how the whole picture was.

    It does sound like bullying if she doesn't treat others this way.
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    (Original post by beautifulbigmacs)
    The hotel industry is full of people who are jumped up on their own ego. Some people have to be like that to survive i guess (notice how it's often the people who seem happy to stay working in the job for years to come). I'm making a generalised statement but I'm talking from years of experience so....

    There are multiple ways to deal with it. Talk to the offender (or try being mindlessly nice...if they see you as harmless a lot of cowards like this will calm down). Otherwise you could talk to your boss. If she makes your life there really miserable, rightly or wrongly i would consider looking for another job depending on how the whole picture was.

    It does sound like bullying if she doesn't treat others this way.
    I do find that's quite true.

    I'm going to bite my tongue for the time-being as I don't want to break down or leave. Sometimes though I'm concerned she's trying to deliberately drive me out; why, I have no idea. I'm not utterly incompetent and I've always been very nice and polite from the beginning. It's a mystery to me.
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    (Original post by BusyBee91)
    I do find that's quite true.

    I'm going to bite my tongue for the time-being as I don't want to break down or leave. Sometimes though I'm concerned she's trying to deliberately drive me out; why, I have no idea. I'm not utterly incompetent and I've always been very nice and polite from the beginning. It's a mystery to me.
    This is the wrong approach.

    This person has clearly decided they don't like you. What you're doing wrong is continuing to be timid and bite your tongue. Clearly this person is taking advantage of the fact that you don't say much and that you're a nice and timid person. Fight fire with fire. If she's being a b**** show that you can be one too. That doesn't mean that you should act as petty as she does, but don't just bite your tongue and put up with her. If she's working on the same level as you then you don't have anything to lose.

    If you don't want to be equally rude to her make sure you confront her about it at the very least.


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    (Original post by BusyBee91)
    Does this sound like subtle signs of bullying?
    Not really bullying, it sounds like someone who is threatened by your presence. How old is she compared to you? A lot of older workers who've been in a job a long time do feel intimidated when a young person appears on the scene and does well because they think that person has more potential to bypass them whereas their own careers are pretty much stagnant.

    She may also just be a bit awkward, as important as housekeeping are to a hotel it's normally comprised of characters who aren't socially confident enough to work FOH and would rather stick amongst themselves.

    (Original post by beautifulbigmacs)
    The hotel industry is full of people who are jumped up on their own ego. Some people have to be like that to survive i guess (notice how it's often the people who seem happy to stay working in the job for years to come). I'm making a generalised statement but I'm talking from years of experience so....
    I don't work with that many people with ego problems in my hotel, although it is a team comprised mainly of young, local workers and a lot of them have grown up together at the same schools and been mates for years. I just instantly clicked with them when I went there (especially my boss who's one of the coolest lads I know) and the banter and prankster stuff we get up to on each other makes work something I actually look forward to.

    Plus it's a fun job a lot of the time anyway!
 
 
 
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