Recently, I have been going through personal family issues which eventually piled on top of me and I broke down in tears in front of a few friends of mine - we all agreed to meet once a month or so that we are able to talk about any issues we have or sit in awkward silence and cry. But unfortunately, it won't happened due to them having a tiff and is unable to be sorted out.
I go from one person to another - unsure who I should stay with. I used to be best friends with this one girl - but during this month our communication skills have disappeared, she hardly texts me when I am late in whilst she is wondering where I am, when I am upset she just leaves me be - no sympathy or hugs or words of comfort but she isn't like that with everyone else - I get treated differently, for some reason I don't know. It was me and her at break time at school, she asked if I was well and I said yes then she just put in headphones and worked (fair enough if she needs to get it done) but bell went and she went off without saying goodbye to although I did have headphones but I could have been tapped on the shoulder and told she was leaving but nothing. Again, at lunch one person said that she needed to give me a hug - she just turned around and said I am not hug person (its not true...she knew that).
I also feel like everyone who says is my friend ends up using me, a shoulder to cry on and leave, being shoved away or left behind. I ended up crying because I hate feeling like an outsider - I feel alone when I am amongst a crowd.
I struggle so much to identify what a true friend is at times.
I don't know what to do now - anything would be useful xox
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