Last week, my boyfriend broke up with me. We both live in China, but are both planning to leave next year. I assumed we would figure out a plan together, which is what I thought he wanted, but one of his reasons for breaking up with me was that he was unsure that we should plan a future together. He also told me that he didn't feel a spark in our relationship anymore and that he 'loved me, but wasn't in love with me' (yes, he actually said those words.. cringe). And at one point he said that he didn't want to be held back by the fact that I don't have a degree (he want's to move to Japan, which would be harder for me to do because you technically need a degree to get a work visa). However, I have always found ways around this, and it hasn't held me back so far! This was all over the phone after I basically forced him to speak to me, as he had been ignoring me for 2 days.
Anyway, the next day we met up, and he told me he had made a huge mistake. We talked for a long time and after, we agreed we could make it work. He did seem genuinely upset at what he had done, which made me really believe he wanted to stay with me, because he's not usually a very emotional person.
I'm happy we stayed together, but I feel like there's a black cloud hanging over us, because I can't forget the things he said when he broke up with me. I'm overly conscious about everything now. Am I texting or calling him too much? Am I trying too hard? Should I try harder? If he doesn't answer his phone, is it because he's had enough of me? I worry about everything now, because now I know how he was feeling before. I do love him, and to be told so bluntly that he doesn't feel the same has really affected me, even though I knew it before. I'm going to talk to him about it, because I'm an adult and I'm not afraid to have a conversation about this, but I just wanted to get some outside opinions. I've always been the kind of person to follow my heart over my head, but I know it's not always the best way, especially when my boyfriend is quite the opposite. I feel like I have to constantly prove to him that I won't be a hindrance on his future plans. Anyone been through this kind of thing before, or had to deal with planning a future together when there are so many complications?
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Feeling worried after getting back together watch
- Thread Starter
- 23-10-2015 06:07
- 23-10-2015 06:11
- 23-10-2015 06:18
You're with the wrong man. He got back with you just to not hurt your feelings. By the time he ignored you for 2 days break up with him
Posted from TSR Mobile
- 23-10-2015 10:15
Get rid. Save subsequent humiliation and take control. Plenty more fish ..
- 23-10-2015 10:19