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Telling a girl who is in a relationship... watch

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    I want to let a girl know that I would date her (or have feeling for her) in a subtle way. The only caveat is that she is in a relationship. My own opinion is that there's nothing wrong with telling a girl you like her if she is in a relationship. She is free to reject me, and if she loves her boyfriend she probably will, but I don't personally see anything wrong with providing a choice. I understand people have different viewpoints; however, I don't intend this thread to be a moral discussion.

    This girl has been in a relationship for quite a few years but has expressed feelings that she doesn't know why she's with him, that they don't really match with each other etcetera. She's in a class with me at university so we see each other quite a lot. I don't know if there's a subtle way to go about telling her I like her/ would date her, but any experience/ advice on this would be much appreciated!
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    Leave it. If she becomes single you can make a move, but while she's in a relationship that's just not on
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    Go for it !! Just tell her !!
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    I can't see the point in telling her tbh.
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    (Original post by georgiaswift)
    Leave it. If she becomes single you can make a move, but while she's in a relationship that's just not on
    Yeah... as I said this thread is not intended to be a moral discussion. Make a thread yourself if you want to discuss the morality of this topic.
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    (Original post by OU Student)
    I can't see the point in telling her tbh.
    Why is that? (genuine question)
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    You wouldn't like it if you eventually got a girlfriend and had a guy approach her telling her that he's got an interest in her

    you'd either tell him to bottle it or allow you to kick him where it hurts.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah... as I said this thread is not intended to be a moral discussion. Make a thread yourself if you want to discuss the morality of this topic.
    I'm not having a moral discussion. You asked for advice; I gave you advice and explained why I recommend that advice. Don't get upset because it isn't what you want to hear
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    (Original post by thecatwithnohat)
    You wouldn't like it if you eventually got a girlfriend and had a guy approach her telling her that he's got an interest in her

    you'd either tell him to bottle it or allow you to kick him where it hurts.
    Please refer to post 5 for my answer to this statement.
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    (Original post by thecatwithnohat)
    You wouldn't like it if you eventually got a girlfriend and had a guy approach her telling her that he's got an interest in her

    you'd either tell him to bottle it or allow you to kick him where it hurts.
    This ^^
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Please refer to post 5 for my answer to this statement.
    You asked a question, and you got an answer.

    You can ignore morals all you want, but everything will go back to it in the end.
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    (Original post by georgiaswift)
    I'm not having a moral discussion. You asked for advice; I gave you advice and explained why I recommend that advice. Don't get upset because it isn't what you want to hear
    I'm hardly upset that other people have different moral opinions. Don't try and be clever by interpreting my post in a way which makes it seem I asked for general advice. I obviously didn't. I asked for advice on how to tell her.
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    Lol go for it bro if he can't keep her as his gf and you can to bad for him


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    (Original post by thecatwithnohat)
    You asked a question, and you got an answer.

    You can ignore morals all you want, but everything will go back to it in the end.
    Yes... an answer to a question I didn't actually ask :congrats:
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    You'd just make her dislike you when she says no.

    When you tell her you like her and she says she has a boyfriend, she'll probably tell her boyfriend (or he'll find out) and you'll make enemies. The girl you like is closer to her boyfriend than you are to her, so she'll hate you too. She'll avoid you and avoid you and when she's single, she'll continue to avoid you.

    She won't say she likes you. If she did she wouldn't have a boyfriend. No, she's not just preparing for worst case scenarios that she never gets a boyfriend and dies alone... If she was, then you don't what that girl who will bail on you when she finds another opportunity.

    Wait till she's single or move on man.
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    No regrets my friend

    Do it.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yes... an answer to a question I didn't actually ask :congrats:
    Fine fine, you asked for advice, which you got.

    Basically.
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    I would just leave it. You are actually setting yourself up for heartache if you go ahead with it. Because she will either a) reject you or b) get with you which case one of these days she will dump your arse for the next upgrade.
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    (Original post by Supermanxxxxxx)
    Lol go for it bro if he can't keep her as his gf and you can to bad for him


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    Even if OP gets his way, OP will one day be the poor boyfriend who is just another rung in the ladder as the girl climbs her way to better and better.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I want to let a girl know that I would date her (or have feeling for her) in a subtle way. The only caveat is that she is in a relationship. My own opinion is that there's nothing wrong with telling a girl you like her if she is in a relationship. She is free to reject me, and if she loves her boyfriend she probably will, but I don't personally see anything wrong with providing a choice. I understand people have different viewpoints; however, I don't intend this thread to be a moral discussion.

    This girl has been in a relationship for quite a few years but has expressed feelings that she doesn't know why she's with him, that they don't really match with each other etcetera. She's in a class with me at university so we see each other quite a lot. I don't know if there's a subtle way to go about telling her I like her/ would date her, but any experience/ advice on this would be much appreciated!
    Coming onto somebody in a relationship is being a bit of a **** but fair enough, your not dishonouring yourself by attempting to take what you desire (in other avenues of life, it's actually a very good trait).

    Consider this though.. if she actually says yes to you then she's essentially committing an act of disloyalty.. is that really an attractive trait? Why would she not do the same to you?

    Hence my opinion is that if all somebody wants is sex, then ignore relationship status. If you want something meaningful, let events run their course and after making sure your not the rebound go for it.
 
 
 
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