'Boyfriends........'

I had a wonderful relationship with my boyfriend a year and a bit ago, he was like my best friend, and I felt so comfortable with him. The only thing is that we were both incredibly shy and neither were particularly 'forward' so we didn't really get intimate. I feel so embarrassed about this and wish we'd talked about it at the time, but we were on and off for ages and I suppose I just assumed it would 'happen'. We only kissed once! He broke up with me cos of Uni to stay 'just friends' and I'm still heartbroken about it now. I hate regret, but I wish I'd done something. I suppose it seemed as though we were just REALLY good friends as opposed to bf/gf as great friends don't get intimate, do they really.

When I was at uni (still heartbroken) I got into a 'relationship' with a guy I barely knew, very quickly. I went further with him (though not sex) than I have with any other guy before. He was really forward and it took the pressure off me having to make the moves. As I'm cripplingly shy, at the time, it I liked the attention and the intimacy etc, which I didn’t have to ALWAYS initiate. But I disrespected him as a person (strongly disagreed with his views). I'm usually very outspoken, but just kept schtum because I liked the physical part of the relationship. Now I’m left feeling like a slag because we moved so fast, it was the first impression many of his friends got of me at uni

Please don't get me wrong, I'm not a slag at all (that’s so not like me), I just got caught up in something. I now totally understand rebounds. I think it’s the whole uni experience that made me react differently to how I usually do too. They were two very different relationships, one with little or no intimacy where I felt sublimely happy, and another where I felt wanted, but there was no real 'spark' or connection. I much preferred the first, but my ex has clearly moved onto new things.

I effectively feel used by both guys....one, as we had a real mental connection, and it seems to me that he is completely ignoring this, and the second, as we got intimate, then he didn't want me any more. Naturally, these 2 'relationships' in such close succession have left me feeling unbelievably used and lonely. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.