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    I've had this thing with a guy for a while now and we've been sexually active but not actually had sex yet, but the problem is that whever we do stuff he never c*ms and i feel so bad because i have no idea why he isnt, like if i'm giving him oral he seems like he enjoys it so much but then stops me and wont let me carry on and im pretty sure im not bad at it and i really feel like i know what im doing but now its making me panic thats its my fault.
    He makes such a big deal out of making sure i do I started to wonder if its because he focuses so much on trying to be able to maybe he cant? Does anyone have any experience in this because i have no idea what to do, i know we need to talk about it but i don't feel ready to ask something so personal.
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    Perhaps the fact that he stops you and won't let you carry on sucking him off has something to do with it. Just keep going until he explodes.
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    Communication or GTFO
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    (Original post by Plantagenet Crown)
    Perhaps the fact that he stops you and won't let you carry on sucking him off has something to do with it. Just keep going until he explodes.
    But why wouldnt he let me finish, surely if he thought he was going to he wouldnt stop me?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    But why wouldnt he let me finish, surely if he thought he was going to he wouldnt stop me?
    That's very odd, if you carried on then presumably he would finish. Have you asked him why it is he stops you?
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    (Original post by Plantagenet Crown)
    Perhaps the fact that he stops you and won't let you carry on sucking him off has something to do with it. Just keep going until he explodes.
    In fact he has said to be on one occasion that it was really good but he just couldnt
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    It can be a number of things, including you not "hitting the right notes".

    He might just struggle to relax, or feel shy reaching orgasm with someone else. It might even just be non-vaginal "sex" which he struggles to finish with.
    Sometimes if sex goes on for too long dicks can lose interest/sensitivity, so it could also be that.

    The key, as others have said, is communication.
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    (Original post by Plantagenet Crown)
    That's very odd, if you carried on then presumably he would finish. Have you asked him why it is he stops you?
    No i havent, i know i really need to i just get very shy about these things when it comes to actually talking
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    (Original post by Kurtle)
    It can be a number of things, including you not "hitting the right notes".

    He might just struggle to relax, or feel shy reaching orgasm with someone else. It might even just be non-vaginal "sex" which he struggles to finish with.
    Sometimes if sex goes on for too long dicks can lose interest/sensitivity, so it could also be that.

    The key, as others have said, is communication.
    I've just been so worried thats it's because im rubbish, but im assuming youd have to be awful for it to not actually feel good?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've had this thing with a guy for a while now and we've been sexually active but not actually had sex yet, but the problem is that whever we do stuff he never c*ms and i feel so bad because i have no idea why he isnt, like if i'm giving him oral he seems like he enjoys it so much but then stops me and wont let me carry on and im pretty sure im not bad at it and i really feel like i know what im doing but now its making me panic thats its my fault.
    He makes such a big deal out of making sure i do I started to wonder if its because he focuses so much on trying to be able to maybe he cant? Does anyone have any experience in this because i have no idea what to do, i know we need to talk about it but i don't feel ready to ask something so personal.
    So you're okay with giving him oral sex but it would be too personal to talk about it?

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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I've just been so worried thats it's because im rubbish, but im assuming youd have to be awful for it to not actually feel good?
    There's a difference between being generally good, and being able to finish a guy.
    You have to get the rhythm down, and read a guy's body language.
    There's nothing wrong with not being able to if you've never done it before, it comes with experience.

    Talk to the guy.
    You can also try more teasing and foreplay to get relaxed and learn to read body language more easily. Massaging a partner can be good for this.

    You'll need to talk to him. If he's young and/or inexperienced it's likely nerves.
 
 
 
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