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Childish girlfriend

I made a mistake of getting into a "relationship" with somebody I thought was more mature than really is. I'm 16, she's nearly 15, but the way she acts is ****ing ridiculous.

She's really hot, but was apparently bullied throughout her first years of high school and "got into real bad anxiety". I'm not a trustworthy person and what she does on a daily basis now really stinks like attention seeking to me. Whenever I'm busy and I don't reply to her texts soon after she sent them, she starts going on about how she gets anxiety attacks. I'm kind of starting to feel like I can't do anything without babysitting her. It's a real issue tho - I can't end the relationship because she is really into me now and I'm afraid that if I hurt her she'll start self harming (which she did once or twice before). I can be cold, but doing that to anyone would be disgusting...

I don't know what to do and I feel like I'm trapped in this situation without a way out. Well, I guess that paradoxically I'm the childish one here for getting myself into this in the first place...

TSR HELP
I don't really think it's a good idea to stay in a relationship you don't want to be in purely to stop her from self harming, otherwise she can have you wrapped around her finger for the rest of her life. I think you should have a good chat with her that it's not working and urge her or her family to seek medical/psychological help if she threatens to self harm. You can't be responsible for what she chooses to do.
Lol she's 14, what were you expecting


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If you're not happy, you need to leave she is clearly very immature and you are not right for each other. Suggest that she seeks help for self harming as well
She sounds really annoying and like a real burden. Get rid, before it's too late.
Nearly 15.... so she is 14 ^^
Original post by Anonymous
I'm kind of starting to feel like I can't do anything without babysitting her. It's a real issue tho - I can't end the relationship because she is really into me now and I'm afraid that if I hurt her she'll start self harming (which she did once or twice before).


This relationship is going to end at one time or another and letting her down gently right now will be better than waiting for it to implode a few years down the line. While she should seek help for her mental health issues (self-harming is pretty serious), it's not fair on you to have to deal with somebody so clingy all the time.

Relationships suck, OP. And one of the major reasons they suck is because the best option isn't exactly painless most of the time. You shouldn't be feeling trapped in any relationship and if you ignore this now, you'll likely find that your own emotional health is affected by having to deal with her. Sorry, but I think you should let her go gently -- don't be cold, but sit her down and talk it through with her and, if possible, try to euphemise some of her flaws i.e. don't use words like 'clingy' or 'babysitter' because that's likely to make her feel worse. Just say you can't see it lasting and that you'd rather be honest with her.

If that doesn't work, I don't know what will. ._.

Edit: As somebody else said, she's 14 years old. They're not the most mature people and I'd be the first to admit that I was an idiot when I was 14. Personally, I wouldn't even go out with somebody that young to be honest. They're on the bridge between chlidhood and adulthood, which is quite tumultuous and you really don't want to be a spectator to that. She's most likely just enjoying the thrill of being in any relationship at all rather than being 'really into you.'
(edited 8 years ago)
And some people never grow out of that behaviour LOL. Sorry but just end it.
[QUOTE=Anonymous;60228203]I made a mistake of getting into a "relationship" with somebody I thought was more mature than really is. I'm 16, she's nearly 15, but the way she acts is ****ing ridiculous.

She's really hot, but was apparently bullied throughout her first years of high school and "got into real bad anxiety". I'm not a trustworthy person and what she does on a daily basis now really stinks like attention seeking to me. Whenever I'm busy and I don't reply to her texts soon after she sent them, she starts going on about how she gets anxiety attacks. I'm kind of starting to feel like I can't do anything without babysitting her. It's a real issue tho - I can't end the relationship because she is really into me now and I'm afraid that if I hurt her she'll start self harming (which she did once or twice before). I can be cold, but doing that to anyone would be disgusting...

I don't know what to do and I feel like I'm trapped in this situation without a way out. Well, I guess that paradoxically I'm the childish one here for getting myself into this in the first place...

TSR HELP

well i'm 14 nearly 15 and i know a lot of people my age that say they are 'mature' for there age when they really aren't, i personally don't fit in very well with the girls in my year grooup due to the immaturity of them all... some girls will be ready for realtionships with older boys however some (like the sounds of your girlfriend) should maybe wait a few more years xx
Like everybody else said - you can't stay in a relationship just because you're worried she'll hurt herself if you end it.

Talk to her, let her down gently, make sure that the relevant people are informed about her self-harming risk, if they don't already know, then back away as fast as you can.

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