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    Hi there, I am a first yr UCL student and often find myself being alone which i dont like. I am staying at home so i spend all weekend at home and feel bad/terrible about it.
    Wht should I do??
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    It's sad to hear that
    I don't start uni for a few months but from what I've heard, Freshers week was the time everyone made their solid friends and since no one knows eachother, it would be easy, you're a first year so freshers wouldn't have been long ago...didn't you go or something?

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    (Original post by Bollie Wu)
    It's sad to hear that
    I don't start uni for a few months but from what I've heard, Freshers week was the time everyone made their solid friends and since no one knows eachother, it would be easy, you're a first year so freshers wouldn't have been long ago...didn't you go or something?

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    i'm not a clubber and living at home makes journeys a pain
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    Why didn't you choose to live at university then?

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    (Original post by Bollie Wu)
    Why didn't you choose to live at university then?

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    i didnt see the difference if i wasnt going to go clubbing and spend over £7000 on accomodation
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    (Original post by cuty123)
    i didnt see the difference if i wasnt going to go clubbing and spend over £7000 on accomodation
    thats why then
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    (Original post by cuty123)
    i didnt see the difference if i wasnt going to go clubbing and spend over £7000 on accomodation
    The way I see it is that you missed your initial chance when you didnt go freshers...Since you live at home you can only rely on the people who you see during lectures or tutes or whatever...or just find someone who's just as lonely as you

    It'll get better
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    Don't worry, it's never too late. You always have a chance to make friends and freshers' week definitely isn't everything. I'd say most friendships made during freshers' week are probably shallow. I live in student accommodation and I haven't made any proper friends yet either. :P
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    My advice as a first year is that whatever situation you are in, whether at home or in accommodation, if you want to make friends you have to put yourself out there. Even though you might find it a bit awkward, going to societies or asking to have lunch with someone or starting a study group, are all just some of the many ways you can make friends. I hate clubbing and I've still made friends. Find out if your uni has any other commuters (there's usually a Facebook page) and try to get to know people in your tutorials. Yes, Fresher's Week does initially help you establish some friends but it is not the defining moment. Just don't use the fact you don't club or live in accommodation as an excuse for why you haven't made friends. I know this is a pretty harsh comment but I want to be blunt with you. There are many ways to make friends that don't involve alcohol or living together (see above examples). Instead of sitting at home at the weekend, go explore London or join a society. Put some effort in. Anyway I'm repeating myself now.

    The point is real friendships take longer to establish then just going to a club once. First you have to put yourself in a social setting and then you have to continue to make the effort the hang out with the people you get on with. Best of luck!
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    (Original post by lavidastudent)
    My advice as a first year is that whatever situation you are in, whether at home or in accommodation, if you want to make friends you have to put yourself out there. Even though you might find it a bit awkward, going to societies or asking to have lunch with someone or starting a study group, are all just some of the many ways you can make friends. I hate clubbing and I've still made friends. Find out if your uni has any other commuters (there's usually a Facebook page) and try to get to know people in your tutorials. Yes, Fresher's Week does initially help you establish some friends but it is not the defining moment. Just don't use the fact you don't club or live in accommodation as an excuse for why you haven't made friends. I know this is a pretty harsh comment but I want to be blunt with you. There are many ways to make friends that don't involve alcohol or living together (see above examples). Instead of sitting at home at the weekend, go explore London or join a society. Put some effort in. Anyway I'm repeating myself now.

    The point is real friendships take longer to establish then just going to a club once. First you have to put yourself in a social setting and then you have to continue to make the effort the hang out with the people you get on with. Best of luck!
    thnks..
    but as i said i hv joined a few societis... and always stay quiet .. how would i ask strangers to lunch?
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    (Original post by cuty123)
    thnks..
    but as i said i hv joined a few societis... and always stay quiet .. how would i ask strangers to lunch?
    Well again to be blunt, if you going to societies and then not taking part by not talking, you aren't helping yourself. Just when the class or societies over just ask the person next to you or someone who you were chatting with "Hey, what are you doing now? Do you want to get lunch some times?". I think to me it seems you are analysing over every little detail and perhaps this stems from a fear of rejection. Of course I don't know you well enough to make established claims but it's just me speculating. The way to make friends is by talking and I know I sound incredibly condescending when I say that but a simple "Hello. How was your day? How did you find that lecture? etc" can go a long way. Good luck!
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    For me personally, Uni is all about finding yourself and seeing what works best for you. Yes you may feel alone, but, there are going to be times in life where you're going to be living on you're own, away from parents/friends/family, and so its a good thing to experience. Yes, its hard to face. But in the long run, being able to deal with feeling lonely or any given situation, and knowing how to overcome it on your own is only a good thing
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    (Original post by AndyP_14)
    For me personally, Uni is all about finding yourself and seeing what works best for you. Yes you may feel alone, but, there are going to be times in life where you're going to be living on you're own, away from parents/friends/family, and so its a good thing to experience. Yes, its hard to face. But in the long run, being able to deal with feeling lonely or any given situation, and knowing how to overcome it on your own is only a good thing
    really!!! tht seems like bad advice!!!
 
 
 
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