How can I be like everyone else?

I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression about a year ago and have quit every job Ive had because I can't be bothered with all the panic on and off, some days im fine but others Im not. Im doing voluntary work to build some confidence up but my parents are always mocking me like when my mums annoyed she says that most people have cars and nice jobs but you 'oh no your different and panic (she holds her hands up pretending to panic). My dad agrees with her and is always calling me a 'sad bastard' and that its embarrasing when people at work ask about me. He tells them that I do nothing and they tell him to chuck me out. Am I really this bad or what? I feel guilty for not contributing much to society and if I were in my parents position I too would think the same as them yet I hate them for it. My mums friend who works in mental health tells her that I have maniulative behaviour or something and that its all behavioural. My mum told her that I phoned her the other week and she said she wouldn't have answered. I don't have a bad attitude or anything I just appear really lazy so I can understand why they are like this but it still makes me really mad. I phoned her because she was at home and I was walking home from work and felt really lightheaded and was scared. Thats a fact but whether I subconciously went really scared and lightheaded to get her attention I don't know, just what do you think?

Im really mad at everyone and my mum said well everyone can't be wrong can they so it must be you. By everyone I mean her, her friend, my dad and they people at work they tell.

Reply 1

goodmen

13

You cant be bothered doing anything so yes they are right. Unless you make an effort to do something whats the point in anything.

i know your looking for compasionate replies but i dont think people tell you to keep on doing jack **** will really help you

Reply 2

The Little Mermaid

Anonymous

I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression about a year ago and have quit every job Ive had because I can't be bothered with all the panic on and off, some days im fine but others Im not. Im doing voluntary work to build some confidence up but my parents are always mocking me like when my mums annoyed she says that most people have cars and nice jobs but you 'oh no your different and panic (she holds her hands up pretending to panic). My dad agrees with her and is always calling me a 'sad bastard' and that its embarrasing when people at work ask about me. He tells them that I do nothing and they tell him to chuck me out. Am I really this bad or what? I feel guilty for not contributing much to society and if I were in my parents position I too would think the same as them yet I hate them for it. My mums friend who works in mental health tells her that I have maniulative behaviour or something and that its all behavioural. My mum told her that I phoned her the other week and she said she wouldn't have answered. I don't have a bad attitude or anything I just appear really lazy so I can understand why they are like this but it still makes me really mad. I phoned her because she was at home and I was walking home from work and felt really lightheaded and was scared. Thats a fact but whether I subconciously went really scared and lightheaded to get her attention I don't know, just what do you think?

Im really mad at everyone and my mum said well everyone can't be wrong can they so it must be you. By everyone I mean her, her friend, my dad and they people at work they tell.

Have you considering checking yourself into outpatient therapy at a psychiatric clinic? No, you're not crazy. But they could help you with coping skills. They might also suggest group work, which I think could really help as you're not getting alot of support at home. They don't have anxiety or depression so of course they're not going to really get it. Groups work in that they are a bunch of people with similar issues (in your case, an anxiety or depression group) that discuss their problems and work with professionals to find a constructive way to deal with them. Right now what you need to do is at least take some action. You can use wanting to show your family that you are trying as motivation. Asking on TSR is a good start, but take it a step further and seek some treatment if you're having this much trouble getting yourself in gear. There are people that can help.

Reply 3

Spent

Get help.

From your perspective it does look as if your parents are being harsh but they'll probablies see things differently. Unless you take action nothings going to change.

Reply 4

Sunofnight

3

Goodmen just because you hear the words 'can't be bothered' don't jump to conclusions, it sounds like the op has tried and is still trying by doing voluntary work. Eitherway calling someone with a mental or physical illness a bastard because they are not coping well is right?

Reply 5

Marianne

Ignore Goodman, he's a troll.

It's really hard to get out of the pit of depression/anxiety. I think you need to work on your self esteem mainly. Try not to be too sensitive to what people say- and that mental health person (probably just works on the reception or something...) hasn't got a clue. Did she actually say it? Did she see you to make a diagnosis? What a load of rubbish.

Good luck x

Reply 6

Louise88

I can't believe how your parents are behaving. People behave in such a way when they don't know an awful lot about something. If they don't understand something, they shrug it off and that is exactly what they are doing. They don't understand about depression and anxiety so they shrug it off and claim that you can't be bothered when this isn't the case at all.

Stand up to your parents, suggest that they actually get off of their arses and learn about what you are going through. Putting you down and treating you in such a horrible way is going to make you feel worse. How can they expect you do want to do anything, to feel better when they are bombarding you with insults and stupid impressions? It's ridiculous.

If you have been diagnosed with something, surely your doctor would have suggested treatment of some sort? Medication. Speaking to someone would do you the world of good too. I suggest that you speak to your doctor about both so that you can get over your depression.

I feel for you, I really do. I can't believe that in this world there are still people who behave in such a manner. You shouldn't have to put up with that and I hope that you manage to get through this difficult time. You are taking a step in the right direction though. You got diagnosed, the next step you can take is treatment. I wish you the best of luck.

Reply 7

Kit-kat-Kate

I would ignore your parents, if they act the way you say then i think its pretty shamefull (does that make sense?) and its more a reflection on them than you.
The OP says they cant be bothered to deal with the panic/depression (not that they cant be bothered to worK) which i can understand. I know how tiring it is having to deal with anxiety attacks, and not knowing how your going to be one day to the next.

I agree with Marianne - try to get your confidence up. Dont let people make you feel bad, the anxiety and depression is something you have to work through and will take time. Carry on with your voluntary work, its important not to let your problem get in the way of doing things and getting on with life in general as it will only make you feel worse. Try to get help of some sort, you might have to look around, you need to find someone or a group of people you feel comfortable with. Different professionals have different approaches i think.

I hope that helps

Reply 8

goodmen

13

yes i'm a troll because i'm not immediatly defending the op. By the sounds of it this person is being supported by her parents finacially since she does absolutley nothing, how is that not support.

You need to get out there get a job and learn to accept the fact that you cant sponge of your parents your whole life or they will not think a whole lot of you

Reply 9

naivesincerity

2

So many people in here have unhelpful parents. Shocking really.

Reply 10

Kit-kat-Kate

The OP is trying to get out there and get a job, and has in the past. They arent 'sponging' off thier parents out of lazyness, and have already said they feel guilty about not contributing more.

Reply 11

Hev456

11

OP ever thought about seeing a counsellor/psychiatrist/doctor? I'm saying this as i've been through moderate to severe depression whilst at school and through the first year of college. I'm only who I am now because I seeked help, and no my parents didn't understand either and would just throw up things like 'all we do for you and you go and ruin a day out' because I was so down I couldn't enjoy myself.

Sadly, unless you try and help yourself no one going to do it for you. There's no magical cure.

Reply 12

Anonymous #2

hi.. im in the same situation.... but im still doing stuff.. i know its hard but try to keep yourself busy and around a lot of people (which is very difficult) but if you stay on your own for too long eventually you'll be afraid to leave the house...

i dont think goodmen is a muppet for saying what he said... its just the people who havent gone through it would obviously find it a bit difficult to understand your situation... i think that getting help is very important.. the group work like someone has mentioned above looks like it would be very useful..

Reply 13

Sunofnight

3

goodmen

yes i'm a troll because i'm not immediatly defending the op. By the sounds of it this person is being supported by her parents finacially since she does absolutley nothing, how is that not support.

You need to get out there get a job and learn to accept the fact that you cant sponge of your parents your whole life or they will not think a whole lot of you

What about people with a physical disability? A lot of them recieve support or in your words 'sponge' off there parents most of there life don't they? Anxiety and depression can be just as crippling as a physical disability the difference is the op can do something about it and perhaps should try harder than he/she is already doing.

I remember having panic attacks when I was a kid and my parents, who I thought would help the most, made things worse.

How can I be like everyone else?

Related discussions

Articles for you