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Shy guy keeps withdrawing from me watch

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    This situation is very frustrating and a little bizarre but basically I got talking to my best friends brother this year. He's sweet and really down to earth, and I really like him, but he's incredibly painfully shy. We'd hung out some months ago and he had seemed very happy. But then he will stop talking to me for weeks at a time. Each time we suggest meeting up or doing something, it just won't follow through, and so I don't know if it's because he isn't that interested or just doesn't have the guts to see me again. Eventually I was invited to a family event, where we inevitably met, and I just played it cool at first. However we ended up fooling around and things got pretty full on, we texted the next day, things still seemed cool. Then again nothing for over a month. He finally messaged me to say all he wants is a relationship but hasn't been texting me because he "doesn't want to sound lame" and "needs to sort himself out." The problem is I can't keep waiting for him when he does this, and I feel like I'm being made a fool out of.
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    You really just need to talk to him, don't even do it via text. Tell him you want to meet up and chat and be open with him, tell him exactly what you've just written and hopefully he gets the message.

    If you let him essentially ignore you for weeks on end then he's not going to change.

    I've never heard of anyone not texting because they 'don't want to sound lame' so really he's one of them people you need to sit down and chat to, I don't think any other way will work.

    Good luck!
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    (Original post by MaseratiJay)
    You really just need to talk to him, don't even do it via text. Tell him you want to meet up and chat and be open with him, tell him exactly what you've just written and hopefully he gets the message.

    If you let him essentially ignore you for weeks on end then he's not going to change.

    I've never heard of anyone not texting because they 'don't want to sound lame' so really he's one of them people you
    need to sit down and chat to, I don't think any other way will work.

    Good luck!
    This is what I've been trying to do for ages, but it never follows through. I can't talk to him if he won't reply in a timely manner (within a few days tops) and actually come and see me.
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    (Original post by jellybabies22)
    This is what I've been trying to do for ages, but it never follows through. I can't talk to him if he won't reply in a timely manner (within a few days tops) and actually come and see me.
    I think if you've been trying to do this for some time and he's just not changing ..I'm sorry to say you may be best moving on from him.

    I'm kind of like that, if someone takes too long to reply to a message or something it's over. I work 50+ hours a week with varying start and end times and if I'm into someone I'll make the effort.

    If he can't reply to you within a few days then jesus christ. I don't really see that as acceptable but then again I'm not very forgiving when it comes to these things XD

    If it's not acceptable for you, then honestly find someone else. I know if it was me someone like that would literally drive me insane.
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    (Original post by MaseratiJay)
    I think if you've been trying to do this for some time and he's just not changing ..I'm sorry to say you may be best moving on from him.

    I'm kind of like that, if someone takes too long to reply to a message or something it's over. I work 50+ hours a week with varying start and end times and if I'm into someone I'll make the effort.

    If he can't reply to you within a few days then jesus christ. I don't really see that as acceptable but then again I'm not very forgiving when it comes to these things XD

    If it's not acceptable for you, then honestly find someone else. I know if it was me someone like that would literally drive me insane.
    It does drive me insane, and I feel like an idiot because whenever he talks to me I always reply within a day or so or straightaway even. I really like him but I can't change him. 😭
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    (Original post by jellybabies22)
    It does drive me insane, and I feel like an idiot because whenever he talks to me I always reply within a day or so or straightaway even. I really like him but I can't change him. 😭
    Don't cry!
    Without trying to sound cliche or god forbid, patronising, sometimes the hardest thing to do is to let go of someone but when you realise that it wouldn't work/it would have frustrated you/you find someone better, it will all be worth it.

    Think about it - shy or not shy, which person especially if they claim they want a relationship can't even send a text? If he can't even text you for fear of sounding lame then god forbid!

    Secondly okay, texting issues aside....why can't he just meet and chat to you?

    If it's like getting blood out of a stone everytime you try and talk to him and you're not even in a relationship yet it just sounds like a lot of hassle and it's seeming more of a one sided thing. You are chasing and running up and down and he's just...there..
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    (Original post by MaseratiJay)
    Don't cry!
    Without trying to sound cliche or god forbid, patronising, sometimes the hardest thing to do is to let go of someone but when you realise that it wouldn't work/it would have frustrated you/you find someone better, it will all be worth it.

    Think about it - shy or not shy, which person especially if they claim they want a relationship can't even send a text? If he can't even text you for fear of sounding lame then god forbid!

    Secondly okay, texting issues aside....why can't he just meet and chat to you?

    If it's like getting blood out of a stone everytime you try and talk to him and you're not even in a relationship yet it just sounds like a lot of hassle and it's seeming more of a one sided thing. You are chasing and running up and down and he's just...there..

    I don't understand it either, and can see what you're saying. It's like I just keep clutching at straws.
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    This thread turned out to be much less graphic than I thought.
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    (Original post by jellybabies22)
    I don't understand it either, and can see what you're saying. It's like I just keep clutching at straws.
    Yeah..that's definitely not funny and it actually sounds frustrating :/

    I don't think it's unreasonable to expect someone to actually try and show effort.

    If he's like this now, he's not going to change drastically or anything if you two did get in a relationship. He sounds like he'd be in the same room as you and still say nothing. If you're okay with that, pursue it. But deep down you sound frustrated so I'd personally say just kick back, relax, enjoy life, pursue other guys and if this one decides to step his game up then consider him.

    Obviously I don't mean go and date and make him jealous (which I'm sure you wouldn't) but just enjoy yourself, don't even think about him for a while.

    Someone took my number and didn't text me for about two months (what the hell was she doing for two whole months) and tried to just casually talk to me. I was like no, sorry, goodbye.

    If someone has my number and their initial text takes more than a week to send, it's a no. If we are having a conversation and they take 2 days or more to reply it's a definite no. I don't get how hard it is to set aside one minute per day even, just to reply to a text? Is it difficult to send one message every 24 hours? I think not XD

    Just think about it XD
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    (Original post by MaseratiJay)
    Yeah..that's definitely not funny and it actually sounds frustrating :/

    I don't think it's unreasonable to expect someone to actually try and show effort.

    If he's like this now, he's not going to change drastically or anything if you two did get in a relationship. He sounds like he'd be in the same room as you and still say nothing. If you're okay with that, pursue it. But deep down you sound frustrated so I'd personally say just kick back, relax, enjoy life, pursue other guys and if this one decides to step his game up then consider him.

    Obviously I don't mean go and date and make him jealous (which I'm sure you wouldn't) but just enjoy yourself, don't even think about him for a while.

    Someone took my number and didn't text me for about two months (what the hell was she doing for two whole months) and tried to just casually talk to me. I was like no, sorry, goodbye.

    If someone has my number and their initial text takes more than a week to send, it's a no. If we are having a conversation and they take 2 days or more to reply it's a definite no. I don't get how hard it is to set aside one minute per day even, just to reply to a text? Is it difficult to send one message every 24 hours? I think not XD


    Just think about it XD
    I totally agree! 😂😂😂
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    (Original post by Awesome Genius)
    This thread turned out to be much less graphic than I thought.
    Sorry to disappoint, but you can inbox for more explicit information.
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    (Original post by jellybabies22)
    I totally agree! 😂😂😂
    I'm glad! XD Too many people like to play games and it's not even necessary :P
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    (Original post by jellybabies22)
    Sorry to disappoint, but you can inbox for more explicit information.
    No lol - just your title init

    dont change it!!!! then ill have to delete my post.
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    (Original post by Awesome Genius)
    No lol - just your title init

    dont change it!!!! then ill have to delete my post.
    Haha didn't think there was anything wrong with the title. It fits.
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    (Original post by jellybabies22)
    Haha didn't think there was anything wrong with the title. It fits.
    https://www.plannedparenthood.org/le...ull-out-method

    ^ On a side note - that chinese couple seem super happy!
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    There comes a point where there is no point chasing anymore shy or not shy.
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    (Original post by Rock Fan)
    There comes a point where there is no point chasing anymore shy or not shy.
    I don't chase him, this is the thing. When he ignores me I just accept it. But I'm tired of feeling like I'm being led on.
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    (Original post by jellybabies22)
    I don't chase him, this is the thing. When he ignores me I just accept it. But I'm tired of feeling like I'm being led on.
    But you are upset when he ignores you, seems you are going through a lot of trouble making the effort to chase him, this is what it suggests from this thread.
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    (Original post by Rock Fan)
    But you are upset when he ignores you, seems you are going through a lot of trouble making the effort to chase him, this is what it suggests from this thread.
    My definition of chasing would be like texting multiple times a day etc. I just go with the flow.
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    (Original post by jellybabies22)
    My definition of chasing would be like texting multiple times a day etc. I just go with the flow.
    Well it seems clearly he is just not interested for whatever reason.
 
 
 
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