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    My girlfriend of nearly 4 years told me that she no longer felt the same way about me and that she no longer loved me as a boyfriend, but more like a brother before breaking up with me.

    I'm heart broken! I cannot even describe my emotions right now and my mind is all over the place. I can only describe the way I feel as grieving over the death of a close family member. I'm in so much pain and don't know what to do with myself. I've not been able to turn up to work for three days because the idea of being around people right now makes me feel sick. I just want to curl up in a ball and sleep for eternity.

    I had no idea she felt this way, and to my knowledge our relationship was great. So this has come to a massive shock to me.

    Furthermore, for the past two years we have been in a long distance relationship as she is at uni. She's currently home but at the weekend she goes back to uni and the thought of not even being able to see her destroys me. I can't stop trying to contact her because not only was she my girlfriend but she is/was also my best friend and she is the person I would go to when I felt down or upset so naturally I want to talk to her and confine in her, but she's just ignoring me.

    It's torture!

    Please can someone offer some advice to try and help me get through this?
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    Staying in your room won't help. Going to work, going out, talking to people will help to take your mind off it. Keep yourself busy and try not to reminisce about old times - if you catch yourself thinking about it, change your train of thought
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    (Original post by *Incognito)
    My girlfriend of nearly 4 years told me that she no longer felt the same way about me and that she no longer loved me as a boyfriend, but more like a brother before breaking up with me.

    I'm heart broken! I cannot even describe my emotions right now and my mind is all over the place. I can only describe the way I feel as grieving over the death of a close family member. I'm in so much pain and don't know what to do with myself. I've not been able to turn up to work for three days because the idea of being around people right now makes me feel sick. I just want to curl up in a ball and sleep for eternity.

    I had no idea she felt this way, and to my knowledge our relationship was great. So this has come to a massive shock to me.

    Furthermore, for the past two years we have been in a long distance relationship as she is at uni. She's currently home but at the weekend she goes back to uni and the thought of not even being able to see her destroys me. I can't stop trying to contact her because not only was she my girlfriend but she is/was also my best friend and she is the person I would go to when I felt down or upset so naturally I want to talk to her and confine in her, but she's just ignoring me.

    It's torture!

    Please can someone offer some advice to try and help me get through this?
    I think in the immediate aftermath you should do whatever feels right, be it curling up or having a pig out. After a few days though you do need to start trying to get to grips with the reality of what has happened. Contacting the ex is very hard to resist but every time you do you are making it harder for yourself to recover. What she is doing is trying to make it as clean a break as possible. It doesn't mean that all of a sudden she has stopped caring but it means that she is trying to get used to not being with you. Years ago I made the mistake of not just keeping in contact but sleeping with my ex which just makes things messier and harder to manage.

    Think of it like a scab. Every time you rip it off it takes longer to eventually go away. Get yourself back to work and concentrate on doing a good job. Get a new hobby to focus your mind on something else, exercise to use your energy constructively. In essence, focus on yourself and this experience will be much easier.


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    This is a near carbon copy of what has happened to me. If you need a private chat hit me up.


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    It takes time but you'll be fine. She may have been great but its over now and its time to move on. Plenty of fish in the sea
 
 
 
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