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Crush on a guy with a girlfriend - should I tell him? watch

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    • #1
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    #1

    Hey,

    So right now I'm at university and I have a massive crush on a guy who's living in the same accommodation block as me (but we are on different floors so we don't see each other too frequently). Sadly for me, he does have a girlfriend but I think he does potentially like me (unless I am misreading the signs, which is possible).

    Anyway, I have an unhealthy crush on him. I literally think about him a lot and it's really distracting - I can't really focus on work properly which sucks. I was thinking that maybe I should just tell him in person that I have a crush on him and either he likes me back (which for me is a good scenario) or he shoots me down (which is also a good scenario because then hopefully, my mind will be at rest - I don't think my infatuation for him will end otherwise, because we do see each other fairly frequently at our accommodation block's events and we message each other and stuff).

    Of course, telling him will be awkward but I think having a crush on him for a whole year or more would be even worse...

    I do feel bad though because he has a girlfriend... I've met his girlfriend a few times and she's a really nice girl (she also lives in the same accommodation block).

    What do you guys think? Am I being a terrible person?
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    No
    Wait for him to break up with her
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey,

    So right now I'm at university and I have a massive crush on a guy who's living in the same accommodation block as me (but we are on different floors so we don't see each other too frequently). Sadly for me, he does have a girlfriend but I think he does potentially like me (unless I am misreading the signs, which is possible).

    Anyway, I have an unhealthy crush on him. I literally think about him a lot and it's really distracting - I can't really focus on work properly which sucks. I was thinking that maybe I should just tell him in person that I have a crush on him and either he likes me back (which for me is a good scenario) or he shoots me down (which is also a good scenario because then hopefully, my mind will be at rest - I don't think my infatuation for him will end otherwise, because we do see each other fairly frequently at our accommodation block's events and we message each other and stuff).

    Of course, telling him will be awkward but I think having a crush on him for a whole year or more would be even worse...

    I do feel bad though because he has a girlfriend... I've met his girlfriend a few times and she's a really nice girl (she also lives in the same accommodation block).

    What do you guys think? Am I being a terrible person?
    There is only one way to solve this problem.

    Ask him if he would like to Netflix and Chill.
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    Oh I didn't realise you felt that way about me. You didn't have to do it indirectly on TSR
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    no ffs you shouldn't be dependent on waiting for their relationship to end in order for you to go out with him. If he has a girlfriend, clearly he has someone in his life. Don't ruin someone elses relationship just to fulfill your selfish matters...

    sorry if it sounds harsh, but he has a partner and you should find someone who doesn't
    "there's plenty of fish in the sea"
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    Welcome Squad
    just no, didn't have to read your op

    it's selfish to ruin a relationship because '(you) like him more'
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    TSR Support Team
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey,

    So right now I'm at university and I have a massive crush on a guy who's living in the same accommodation block as me (but we are on different floors so we don't see each other too frequently). Sadly for me, he does have a girlfriend but I think he does potentially like me (unless I am misreading the signs, which is possible).

    Anyway, I have an unhealthy crush on him. I literally think about him a lot and it's really distracting - I can't really focus on work properly which sucks. I was thinking that maybe I should just tell him in person that I have a crush on him and either he likes me back (which for me is a good scenario) or he shoots me down (which is also a good scenario because then hopefully, my mind will be at rest - I don't think my infatuation for him will end otherwise, because we do see each other fairly frequently at our accommodation block's events and we message each other and stuff).

    Of course, telling him will be awkward but I think having a crush on him for a whole year or more would be even worse...

    I do feel bad though because he has a girlfriend... I've met his girlfriend a few times and she's a really nice girl (she also lives in the same accommodation block).

    What do you guys think? Am I being a terrible person?
    Nothing you can do I am afraid, he's in a relationship so he is off limits.
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    Let it go! There are sooo many other single guys around.
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    I know it's going to be hard to get over him, but there's nothing you can do really. Unless you are willing to wait...but what if it works out for him and his gf? What would u do then? Hang out with your other friends, distract yourself. You shouldn't try and avoid him because your crush would probz get worse. Have you tried going on dates with other guys?
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    Tell him... if he's happy with his gf then you'll be able to move on.
    • #2
    #2

    I haven't got the sole intent of 'stealing' him per se. I kind of just want peace of mind - if he rejects me then I'll be able to move on properly. Whereas right now, I'm kind of living on hope.
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    I read the title as crush on a guy with a girlfriend should I kill him? XD
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    Not sure I understand this mentality at all...just leave it alone.

    Nothing good will come of it and you can't just do it so you'll feel better, that's just...

    If you were in a relationship with a guy and a girl told him she had a crush on him I know you'd trawl the internet day and night watching her every move and then you'd probably get all defensive and insecure etc, he wouldn't be able to blink without you questioning his feelings for someone else...am I right? Or am I right?

    On of the most selfish things a person could do, have some self control and try and distance yourself from him. You two can't be texting often/deep meaningful things if it's going to make you feel this way.
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    (Original post by MaseratiJay)
    Not sure I understand this mentality at all...just leave it alone.

    Nothing good will come of it and you can't just do it so you'll feel better, that's just...

    If you were in a relationship with a guy and a girl told him she had a crush on him I know you'd trawl the internet day and night watching her every move and then you'd probably get all defensive and insecure etc, he wouldn't be able to blink without you questioning his feelings for someone else...am I right? Or am I right?

    On of the most selfish things a person could do, have some self control and try and distance yourself from him. You two can't be texting often/deep meaningful things if it's going to make you feel this way.

    Couldn't have said it any better myself. The whole thing baffles me!
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    I only read the title and then immediately went "no. nonono. no"

    So, no.
 
 
 
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