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Anti-Bullying Week 2015 watch

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    Anti-Bullying Week is running 16th-20th November 2015, with the theme make a noise about bullying!

    Bullying can come in many different forms and affect people of all ages, in any situation. It's not always obvious to those outside but can have a huge effect on the victim's mental health both at the time and later in life.
    *Have you ever been bullied?
    *Have you been the bully, and why did you do it?
    *At what point does teasing cross the line into bullying, and have you experienced this?
    *How did you stay positive being bullied, and have you taken anything good from it?
    *How did other people react to you being bullied, did anything help to stop it?

    If you are being bullied more information can be found from Bullying UK and for the workplace specifically, Mind. For more general support there is also Childline and the Samaritans.
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    I used to get bullied a lot at secondary school. I found that none of the teachers were actually interested. Or rather, the response was to punish me by moving me to another class instead of dealing with the bully. Oh, and then there was the teacher who tried justifying some bully's behaviour by claiming she was having some issues at home. I'm sorry; but that's no excuse. I had that issue last year with some guy harassing me - apparently, his behaviour is fine because of some issues he has and I've got to deal with it. He was lucky the police didn't get involved.

    I have a friend who has this habit of teasing me a lot. But I know that's what he's really doing and unlike some people, he doesn't take it so far and does know when to stop. I didn't realise that's what he was really doing one time and my response was to become rather offended. oops.
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    it should be anti bullying week every week
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    (Original post by OU Student)
    I used to get bullied a lot at secondary school. I found that none of the teachers were actually interested. Or rather, the response was to punish me by moving me to another class instead of dealing with the bully. Oh, and then there was the teacher who tried justifying some bully's behaviour by claiming she was having some issues at home. I'm sorry; but that's no excuse. I had that issue last year with some guy harassing me - apparently, his behaviour is fine because of some issues he has and I've got to deal with it. He was lucky the police didn't get involved.

    I have a friend who has this habit of teasing me a lot. But I know that's what he's really doing and unlike some people, he doesn't take it so far and does know when to stop. I didn't realise that's what he was really doing one time and my response was to become rather offended. oops.
    urghh i hate teachers who punish the victim, i got this person in my pe class who has to be isolated in the gym whilst all the boys do something else. according to the teacher people just dont want to ''accept him'' so he had to resort to that...honestly, he's got balls and rackets deliberately thrown at him and once got his nose bled, an ambulance came to take him away when this massive guy in our class decided to run at him with intention and knocked him out during rugby, it's horrible how they choose to deal with this.
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    (Original post by ihatePE)
    urghh i hate teachers who punish the victim, i got this person in my pe class who has to be isolated in the gym whilst all the boys do something else. according to the teacher people just dont want to ''accept him'' so he had to resort to that...honestly, he's got balls and rackets deliberately thrown at him and once got his nose bled, an ambulance came to take him away when this massive guy in our class decided to run at him with intention and knocked him out during rugby, it's horrible how they choose to deal with this.
    It appears to be easier than dealing with the bully.

    I do remember complaining of sexual harassment in year 11. The teacher's response was to laugh. Seriously, what the ****?
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    (Original post by ihatePE)
    it should be anti bullying week every week
    I'd agree with this but seeing as there is a specific week for it we might as well try and use it

    (Original post by OU Student)
    It appears to be easier than dealing with the bully.

    I do remember complaining of sexual harassment in year 11. The teacher's response was to laugh. Seriously, what the ****?
    I don't understand it. I get that bullying can be hard to stop and maybe can't always be completely but punishing the victim doesn't do anything other than being able to say 'oh, we've sorted it' and making them feel even worse about themselves. A teacher laughing at it is just horrible.


    Another question for anyone that wants to answer it- what do you think can be done to help stop bullying?


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    (Original post by furryface12)
    I'd agree with this but seeing as there is a specific week for it we might as well try and use it


    I don't understand it. I get that bullying can be hard to stop and maybe can't always be completely but punishing the victim doesn't do anything other than being able to say 'oh, we've sorted it' and making them feel even worse about themselves. A teacher laughing at it is just horrible.


    Another question for anyone that wants to answer it- what do you think can be done help stop bullying?


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    To me, if you punish the victim, you're letting the bully win. You're also telling the victim tough.

    When I was at school and complained of being bullied, they'd always say we'd get it sorted; but they never did.

    As for your question - I don't know. Bullies do it because they can. They don't care about the people they bully. Teachers claim there's policies in place to deal with bullying. From experience, nothing's ever done.
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    (Original post by OU Student)
    To me, if you punish the victim, you're letting the bully win. You're also telling the victim tough.

    When I was at school and complained of being bullied, they'd always say we'd get it sorted; but they never did.

    As for your question - I don't know. Bullies do it because they can. They don't care about the people they bully. Teachers claim there's policies in place to deal with bullying. From experience, nothing's ever done.
    Exactly, and telling the bully they can get away with it. My school were the same, or were with other people anyway- I never told anyone which was maybe wrong but I could never see how it could help.

    Yeah, I don't know either. Most potential solutions seem to make it worse but there must be some effective way. For me I resolved it mostly by hiding away but with hindsight that didn't really help anything.


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    (Original post by furryface12)
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    Great thread furryface!

    I'm going to use Anti-Bullying Week for a personal pledge to make more effort in spotting mild bullying and calling it out / defending the person. It happens all the time in every day life no matter the age. Little put downs, digs etc. Over time they all add up and bring people down. I want to try to be more aware of it and help prevent it.
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    Okay I'm not sure if this is bullying or not ,but this girl that I sit next to in a lesson I don't like her because she's so quiet .one time I just blurted out in class that she stinks and everyone started believing it even though it wasn't true and now most the popular people make fun of her .
    I regret it what should I do ?
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    *Have you ever been bullied?

    I have been bullied, yes.

    *Have you been the bully, and why did you do it?

    No. I would never be able to bully someone else - I just couldn't do it.

    *At what point does teasing cross the line into bullying, and have you experienced this?

    When you've said 'stop' and 'no' enough times, e.g. once and it continues. Part two: Yes.

    *How did you stay positive being bullied, and have you taken anything good from it?

    I didn't. I think I just have a natural inclination to push through things. I'm blessed to be that way. Not really, it ruined a significant chunk of my life, there is nothing positive that came out from it bar the realisation of my strength and resilience.

    *How did other people react to you being bullied, did anything help to stop it?

    Teachers joined in, pupils couldn't care less, parents couldn't care less, and only my resilience and the help of one amazing teacher, stopped it. Even my friends would just shut up if it all started going down, they didn't want to "get involved" because it wasn't their "place". Lmao.
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    "this school doesn't tolerate bullying" - biggest lie told in schools.

    I was bullied from the age of seven. 3 different schools. It didn't stop.

    No one ever did anything, they always seemed to make it my fault and i was the one who got punished whenever i walked out of the class because i couldn't deal with it anymore.

    Teachers joined in, pupils also joined in. A couple teachers supported me and helped me towards the end, i've been left with issues from the bullying that are still affecting me to this day.
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    I get bullied by stangers in the street. Once I was walking down the pavement and some youths told me that no ugly people could walk here. I also get bullied by the way I dress ... people take offence to me wearing a suit and tie to work. Over Halloween I was egged so had to take my suit to the dry cleaners.
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    TW: details of bullying

    CW: swearing involved

    I went to secondary school from 2008 - 2013 which is when the bullying was dominating my life. People started picking on me in late 2008 but the bullying started properly in early 2009. It didn't stop until Summer/Autumn 2012. So I was bullied for about 3 or 4 years. It was mainly verbal, social and emotional bullying but physical, sexual, romantic and cyber bullying became prevalent at certain points for a while too.

    [Most people know by now, but for any younger ones/newer ones on here that need some further information of bullying types to determine if and how you are being bullied]:

    Spoiler:
    Show


    Verbal bullying: deliberately and repeatedly saying mean and hurtful things to make fun of you, ridicule you, embarrass you or upset you e.g. name-calling, threats, insults etc.

    Social bullying: deliberately and repeatedly subjecting you to social humiliation by embarrassing you in front of (or in the knowledge of) peers- this is done to humiliate you, belittle you, hurt your reputation and take away your friends etc. e.g. gossiping, spreading rumours, excluding you from groups, turning your friends against you, name-calling in front of multiple people etc. Verbal and cyber bullying are particular subcategories of social bullying but it can be a type all on its own.

    Emotional bullying: technically all bullying can qualify as emotional bullying but emotional bullying itself is specifically deliberately and repeatedly hurting your feelings. They do NOT have to know that they are doing it but they often don't care when they do know. This can involve name-calling, threats, lies, rumours, gossip, mockery, insults, excluding you from groups etc.

    Physical bullying: the most visibly obvious of all, this is deliberately and repeatedly hurting your body and also possessions. E.g. punching, slapping, hitting, kicking, grabbing, shoving around, tripping up, pushing over, wrestling, pulling hair, throwing stuff, breaking stuff etc.

    Sexual bullying: a general form of sexual harassment, this is deliberately and repeatedly touching you and/or invading your physical privacy, (sometimes along with sexual/sarcastically flirtatious speech), without your full consent in a sexual or sensual manner that makes you uncomfortable. This can involve catcalling, unwanted sexual/sensual demands, unwanted advances, insults towards your sexuality, sexual preferences and sexual activity etc.

    ON THE MOMENT THAT SEXUAL BULLYING BECOMES PHYSICALLY SEXUAL AND PERSISTS/CONTROLS YOU, IT IS SEXUAL ABUSE. You do not have to know that it is for it to be sexual abuse and anyone of any relation to you at all can sexually abuse you.

    Helpful numbers: 0800 1111(ChildLine), and 116 123, (Samaritans)

    Romantic bullying: a general form of romantic harassment with deliberately and repeatedly making romantic requests/demands. Just refer to sexual bullying and change sexual/sensual to romantic basically. If you are experiencing this in a relationship, this is abuse.

    Cyber bullying: deliberately and repeatedly bullying you through electronic tactics such as phone, email, social networking sites, forums etc. This can involve hurtful text messages, calls, emails, statuses, tweets, snapchats etc.

    There may be other types of bullying too so sorry if I missed anything or didn't define something properly.


    PLEASE GET HELP AND SUPPORT IF YOU ARE GETTING BULLIED!

    Suffering in silence is the worst thing. You may think you're protecting people, but you're not, you're just letting them win.

    I was verbally, socially and emotionally bullied for a few years, the names, the threats, the lies, the rumours, the gossip, the jokes, the insults, the exclusion, the distancing, the laughter etc. It was horrible. I never did fit in. But that doesn't always matter. Just be yourself anyway. Haters gonna hate. The right people will love you for you. Trust me, I am lucky to know those people in my life. I was sometimes physically, sexually and romantically bullied too, and there were a few phases of cyber bullying too. Lots of people eventually got into tons of ****. Not everyone, but most, and they eventually gave up.

    Even after all the teasing, the bull**** said about me, the sexual harassment, the emotional abuse, even after being ganged up on by over 60 people at once, even after being rumoured to have attempted suicide, even after having all of my GCSE coursework deleted (which most was retrieved), and even after all the exclusion and mockery- I survived. I made it. No one bullies me anymore.

    And now I have the best of friends, I'm following my dreams, and I'm promoting anti-bullying and here for anyone struggling at all. I'm open and willing to support people and see them grow and be happy.

    So all the bullies in the world: **** you, you lose

    P.S. excuse any typos please

    Thank you for reading
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    I was bullied at secondary school (for having quite short, rather bushy hair) and at university too (was just stuck with ********s tbh, who felt the need to belittle me/others in order to make the bullies feel better). I have never knowingly/actively bullied someone but I guess we are all guilty of saying off-the-cuff remarks that are probably quite hurtful, so I'm almost certainly guilty of that :getmecoat:

    I'm not sure there is a definite, set-in-stone line for where teasing becomes bullying. I guess if it is constant and persistent, it is bullying? :dontknow:

    In secondary school it was quite hard to stay positive because I was being bullied by people across all year groups in the school. It made me rather paranoid. I remember one time hiding behind bushes because the bullies were walking in front of me and kept turning around I used to think everyone was laughing at me I guess the saving grace in the secondary school bullying case was that I had good friends and even though they didn't necessarily know about the bullying, knowing that there was SOMEONE who liked me and wouldn't laugh at me helped?

    The uni bullying, I didn't deal with too well. There were two people who bullied me. One was a peer, one was a tutor. The peer, I allowed to bully me for nearly a whole academic year before I cracked and reported him. In hindsight, I should have nipped it in the bud and been assertive and stood up for myself. In the case of the tutor, I did mostly stand up for myself. We used to have epic rows via email and I always won in the end, mwahahaha :king1: My college knew that this tutor was bullying me but they were like "oh that's just R being R!" and I was like :erm:

    Looking back, all the bullying I did no doubt contributed to/fuelled my breakdown at uni and my being diagnosed with a psychotic disorder. Call me too sensitive if you want, but bullying can have life-changing negative repercussions on those being bullied :sadnod:
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    Surely it's only banta?
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    (Original post by YoMamasFat)
    Surely it's only banta?
    Not when they're standing there kicking the **** out of you or accussing you of sending letters to their boyfriend apparently trying to split them up or beating you up or following you around online accusing you of **** like benefit fraud.

    "banta" is what happens between friends.
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    i was bullied recently at the age of 30 in my gymn changing rooms, there were students from college who would tease me about wearing briefs this started earlier this year and it lasted until august when i changed the days i went down there, looking back the bullying has not really affected me that much but it did make me have aniety attacks
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    Teachers DGAF for the most part. I wasn't bullied but when I was younger a girl that lived on my road, a few years younger than me, was picking on another girl, taking the piss out of her looks etc as I was walking past. I laughed and said to her "You're taking the piss out of the way she looks? You like like a ****ing horse!". Next day at school, her cousin comes up to me after P.E., starts shouting in my face "Watch your back at break time, my brother is gonna find you and bit the **** out of you you ****ing ****!!!!!" :rofl: Now, I know her brother, I knew that wasn't going to happen... but the fact that the P.E. teacher just stood there, watched the whole thing unfold, knew nothing of the background behind the whole thing, and just walked off without saying a word... well done mate, one of your pupils just threatened another and you, as a teacher, did nothing.
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    Had one issue in year 10 , it was two guys and i beat the **** out of them. I got in trouble but i still don't care.
 
 
 
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