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Does this mean its time to leave halls? watch

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    #1

    I'm a first year uni student. I thought my flatmates were my friends and others but now no one talks to me. **** sake it pisses me off, i mean thought in freshers week we was one big family lol.

    I'm alone in uni. No one invites me to anything anymore. My flatmates even avoid me in the kitchen and even if i see one of them on the street. Yes, i have depression and it has gotten worse.

    Next year i'm planning to live alone anyway but i now think i'm allergic to the university and i should move out asap. Help me, what should i do
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    Are you seeing anyone or taking anything for your depression? I also have it and I know it stops me from seeing things clearly - you're probably more lucky than you realise. If you aren't, then go to the GP and start CBT/anti depressants to help. I know depression stops you from wanting to socialise and if your flat mates aren't talking to you as much that's probably why - there have been times when I've felt like I'm making an effort but people have told me it seems like the opposite.

    Edit: in conclusion, try to treat your depression. Also try to socialise when you don't feel too low - people will appreciate the effort. Even if your flat mates don't, there are people who will. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk
    • #1
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    (Original post by georgiaswift)
    Are you seeing anyone or taking anything for your depression? I also have it and I know it stops me from seeing things clearly - you're probably more lucky than you realise. If you aren't, then go to the GP and start CBT/anti depressants to help. I know depression stops you from wanting to socialise and if your flat mates aren't talking to you as much that's probably why - there have been times when I've felt like I'm making an effort but people have told me it seems like the opposite.

    Edit: in conclusion, try to treat your depression. Also try to socialise when you don't feel too low - people will appreciate the effort. Even if your flat mates don't, there are people who will. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk
    Are you in uni now?

    I know i did my best to socialise right from freshers week (i even thought i was popular with people at this time), but i always knew there was a grudge between me and them. For example, one of my flatmate is in some of my lectures but he avoids to talks to me. We only say hi, 'small talk' then bye.

    When i tell them i'm going home, they don't contact me for a long period. When i told this this girl (who i like) about this situation i'm having, she thinks the reason why my flatmates didn't contact me is because 'they don't want you, their not your friends'

    I could go on and on but tbh i see an alternative to this is living alone. I don't want to die early because everyone sees me as a boring person.
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    Pathetic life i'm living in
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    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm a first year uni student. I thought my flatmates were my friends and others but now no one talks to me. **** sake it pisses me off, i mean thought in freshers week we was one big family lol.

    I'm alone in uni. No one invites me to anything anymore. My flatmates even avoid me in the kitchen and even if i see one of them on the street. Yes, i have depression and it has gotten worse.

    Next year i'm planning to live alone anyway but i now think i'm allergic to the university and i should move out asap. Help me, what should i do
    When I first started uni I kinda felt like you. I'm really shy when I first meet people so my flatmates left me out and I didn't really get invited out so I know it's not a nice feeling.

    Lucklily I did come out my shell (alcohol helped a lot ngl) and now have people to hang out with and actually get invited out too much!

    I understand how you feel though. What degree you doing and at which uni? If you're doing a solid degree at a decent uni then I'd advise you to try your best to stick with it and focus in your studies, but if it's not such a great subject at an ex poly or something then it's probably not worth staying if you're that unhappy.
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    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    When I first started uni I kinda felt like you. I'm really shy when I first meet people so my flatmates left me out and I didn't really get invited out so I know it's not a nice feeling.

    Lucklily I did come out my shell (alcohol helped a lot ngl) and now have people to hang out with and actually get invited out too much!

    I understand how you feel though. What degree you doing and at which uni? If you're doing a solid degree at a decent uni then I'd advise you to try your best to stick with it and focus in your studies, but if it's not such a great subject at an ex poly or something then it's probably not worth staying if you're that unhappy.
    I'm at a midlands uni.

    Alcohol could be the cause. When i was drunk, it seemed two flatmates in particular hated it and i think this is just another factor.

    I do a Foundation year which is probably another factor why this isn't working. Tbh i have ran out of ideas hence the reason im trying to look for a studio flat.
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    your flatmates aren't the be all and end all of friendships. I hated my flatmates they were so different to me, I didn't spend time with them at all.... I made friends with people from another flat.... at first i just knocked on the door and was like "heeeey, I dont know many people do you wanna maybe hang out or do something?" I put in effort coz it's easier for them to stick to their flat but after a bit I was close friends with them and all was good. Can do that with societies and other things. Find out why your flatmates don't seem to want to be friends and work on it... if it's something you did when drunk just say sorry and try and make it up with them? If it doesnt work then at least u know for next time. Don't give up on uni cos you don't get on with a few people!!!!
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    (Original post by Jenx301)
    your flatmates aren't the be all and end all of friendships. I hated my flatmates they were so different to me, I didn't spend time with them at all.... I made friends with people from another flat.... at first i just knocked on the door and was like "heeeey, I dont know many people do you wanna maybe hang out or do something?" I put in effort coz it's easier for them to stick to their flat but after a bit I was close friends with them and all was good. Can do that with societies and other things. Find out why your flatmates don't seem to want to be friends and work on it... if it's something you did when drunk just say sorry and try and make it up with them? If it doesnt work then at least u know for next time. Don't give up on uni cos you don't get on with a few people!!!!
    Let me just face it

    I have lost ideas. Thank you for your comment but it is just too late.

    I hate being a social outcast but oh well
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
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    I'm crowdsourcing ideas and asking people if i should do a 1hr 30 commute starting from January. Once i get a good enough answer from people. The decision will be done on January as im finding it hard trying to find a studio flat for January and september 2016.
    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm a first year uni student. I thought my flatmates were my friends and others but now no one talks to me. **** sake it pisses me off, i mean thought in freshers week we was one big family lol.

    I'm alone in uni. No one invites me to anything anymore. My flatmates even avoid me in the kitchen and even if i see one of them on the street. Yes, i have depression and it has gotten worse.

    Next year i'm planning to live alone anyway but i now think i'm allergic to the university and i should move out asap. Help me, what should i do
    You'll make more friends over the course of the year on your course than you will on Freshers week :P And you'll probablky end up living with them rather than your current flat mates if you don't get on with them :P
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    You'll make more friends over the course of the year on your course than you will on Freshers week :P And you'll probablky end up living with them rather than your current flat mates if you don't get on with them :P
    This is so unlikely.

    The truth is, i know i have done my best. I want to assume im not making social progress because im ugly, or im boring.

    I don't even expect no one to ask me to live with them next year hence im struggling to find a flat for myself
 
 
 
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