Should I break up with my girlfriend?

Poll

Should I split up from my girlfiend?

I have been in a relationship with this girl who I will call (kate) and we have been going out for 2 years now, I loved her so much when we were dating but now I feel we have lost the spark, we have argued many times over stupid things and it just builds stress and makes me feel I have to be careful with everything I say or do. Early stages we were both protective of eachother and we wouldnt want eachother speaking to anyother opposite sex as friends because we were scared (I was 15/16 at the time) I am now 2 months away from being 18 now and I feel like I havent lived life to the full as much as I should have its only recently I have been putting myself out there, I mean ive done drugs got drunk but ive started to socialise a lot more and make new friends. So I was saying to my gf a while back that I dont mind her talking to boys now and I thibk we should let eachother have opposite sex friends since theres no reason not to if we trust eachother. She says thats fine but she still panicks a lot and gets really touchy which is driving me mad.

So things have been quite bad lately, shes into romance and stuff were as I am an emotional person and I can show it but I chose not to because in the past this made me venerable and I got bullied and suffered with depression but now im a very happy person. Right now I just want to party and make new friends and socialise, but my gf wants to see me so mcuh shes very needy and like ive said to her im not good at being this romantic guy who is always staying inbeing together 24/7, I need my own space and need to have fun as does she. The other night I went out to a bar/pub for my mates b-day with other mates, we got there and there were people I havent met before at school so I was quite nevous but I had a few drinks and I was fine, I made new friends that night it was brilliant.
There was this girl though… ive seen her in my sixthform before and ive never had the balls to just chat because I get too nervous. But she was friends with a girl im friends with and I was outside the oub with this girl I havent spoke to before (lucy) and I was smoking I was pissed but I remember everything, me and her were chatting outside and smoking and we just got along so well, never spoke to eachother and we just clicked instantly.

Her friend who is also mine (ellie) joined us and we jsut had such a good time doing shots, I spent ages with this girl (lucy) we were linking arms laughing togehter, just non stop, we were like best mates at the end of the night. She invited me to her party this comimg december from meeting me once so I said yes. Ever since that night though I cant stop thinking about her…

I told my gf how I made new friends and me and (lucy) got along really well, but she goes all sad and thinks im going to cheat and she has a panick attack and doesnt stop crying for an hour. I comforted her and that but shes just making me feel down and our relationships ****e and shes so needy and it jsut makes me not want to see her that mcuh, abd when I say I love you to her sometimes I say it and feel like im just saying a lie to her because I jsut dont feel it that much anymore.

I feel if I break up with her ill regret it because we get along so well but the spark isnt there anynore for me but shes totally in live with me. I just know if I split up with her because shes really into me it will kill her and I dont want to do tjat because I still care. I jsut feel as well im too young for a seriosu relationship and I need to just get out there, I was so tempted to kiss and possibly have sex with that girl (lucy) that night but I didnt because I know I wouldnt want to be cheated on. I just feel weve met at the wrong time if I partied and shagged peole and then met her ehen I was 25 or something and that would be great but im 18 and want to live life and expierence it

So should I split up from her or should I keep going

Reply 1

Premium VitaFit

she sounds like my first gf, I hope shes not for the sake of your mental health!

look m8, you want to bang other people, obviously that wont work in a committed relationship environment. end it.

Reply 2

silverbolt

Until you have exhausted all other options then why throw it away?

You've lost the spark you say? Are you sure its not just that your in a rut, youve become too complacent.

Before throwing it away make sure its actually something that needs to be thrown away

Reply 3

Goaded

I'd end it if I was with a guy like this. Lol

Reply 4

shamlan

IMHO your problem is that when you guys started dating you were too close and nobody mentioned the "own space/time" subject, Or at least did not feel the need of the "own space/time".

You allowed her to be that needy. And being needy ruins every relationship i have ever heared of.

Too much honey makes you sick my friend..

I think the best solution is for both of you to take a break for a while, See other people. And after doing so you can rethink if you guys want to be together or not.

Don't break up and hurt yourself and her.

Regret is the most awful feeling a person can live.

Remember i said that it is my opinion and i may be wrong but if i were in your situation, That's what I'll do.

Good luck, It is a tough situation.

P.S: I Haven't voted in the poll, Because my solution is neither a yes or no.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Don't be a ****. Nobody deserves to be with someone who bitches about them on TSR.

Reply 6

guilbert

I'm not really sure what the point of the poll is - I get the impression you want to leave "Kate" and are hoping people will tell you to break up with her. It's up to you what you do but clearly you can't carry on lusting after "Lucy" while you're still with "Kate". Before you break up though ask yourself how you might feel if "Lucy" turns out not to be interested in you next time you see her (you've only met her once and you were both drunk) and "Kate" moves on and gets a new boyfriend.

Reply 7

Retired_Messiah

Original post by shamlan

Out of interest, have you ever seen a "break" that lead to the two people involved in said "break" getting back together and being happy again?

I've never seen one that that did that so I normally disregard it as a workable solution to anything...

Reply 8

hejraat

Yes you should break up,
Why? Because you're a total ass.

If you want to 'live life to the fullest' you shouldn't be in a relationship.

Reply 9

shamlan

Original post by Retired_Messiah

Haven't thought about it that way.. But you have a valid point.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 10

Chicken Bacon

You're the problem with the relationship, not her.

yeah she's a bit needy but who the fk cares ? She loves you wake up.

Reply 11

Siberiaan

Didn't even read , TLDR pls.

Reply 12

Goaded

Original post by Retired_Messiah

Me and my ex. Took a break around the year mark, got back together and spent 2/3 more years together. I was happier after the break.

Reply 13

Retired_Messiah

Original post by shamlan

Haven't thought about it that way.. But you have a valid point.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Aw I was hoping I would learn something new. I guess my standard philosophy of "if you feel you "need a break" just break up" still works then.

That's depressing.

Original post by TSR Mustafa

Didn't even read , TLDR pls.

TL;DR: He wants to party instead of doing relationship things and doesn't love his gf and is tempted to bang other girls but he's not sure he wants to dump her purely on the basis that she loves him.

Original post by Chicken Bacon

yeah she's a bit needy but who the fk cares ? She loves you wake up.

Having somebody love you is irrelevant if you've reached a point where you can't love them back and are tempted to get with other people.

Reply 14

Retired_Messiah

Original post by Goaded

Me and my ex. Took a break around the year mark, got back together and spent 2/3 more years together. I was happier after the break.

Oh huh you got in just before I did my post.

That's interesting... although... he is an ex. O.o

Reply 15

Goaded

Original post by Retired_Messiah

Oh huh you got in just before I did my post.

That's interesting... although... he is an ex. O.o

Distance. He went to uni. I say 2/3 years cause we barely saw each other for the third and while long distance relationships are relationships, it felt fruitless. Nonetheless, we remain good friends. :smile:

No bad blood.

(have even had the odd cheeky reunion ;-)

Reply 16

angelcake123

Yes break up with her. She may be needy but that is because she loves you. You dont love her so save her future grief and break up with her now. Why continue the relationship if its already dead? You dont see anyone watering a dead flower eh.