Upsetting your partner - what do you normally do?

Let's say your partner is generally slightly moody and will get sulky with the slightest matter (e.g. not speaking to you if you were late for something, not remembering their birthdays, etc.); what do you normally do to get their attention? Do you apologies? Keep quiet as well?

What's your generally limit when entertaining their moodiness?

Of course this is under the assumption that you do want to be with your partner (so none of that 'I'll throw them out of the house and find another one' stuff).

Reply 1

hejraat

10

Assuming you're a dude
Ask whats wrong - she'll say nothing - keep insisting or w/e until she tells you (but then ofc there is a 10% she actually doesn't want to talk about it so let it go if she doesn't tell you, you got your point across then anyway)

Ask once and she'll always say 'nothing' but it means 'keep asking me whats wrong and make me feel better'

Reply 2

silverbolt

19

Id frankly get really pissed off.

THat sulky moody behaviour is really annoying

Reply 3

Rum Ham

20

If they got moody with me over something small like I was 5/10 mins late then I would just tell them to grow a pair and move on, especially if they can be bad for being late or being forgetful sometimes too. I would give them the silent treatment until they had calmed down. We all get moody at little things sometimes and that is ok, just as long as its not all the time.

Reply 4

EdUniPostgrad95

7

Well, not being 100% happy 100% of the time is completely normal...
Best thing you could do is just ask her. If she tells you there's an issue (you forgetting her birthday for example) you could do something to make it up to her, to show her you care? That would be a better way to keep her, than to be moody back to her.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 5

Goaded

17

I'd break up with them if they're moody all the time. I'm not, I'll always do my best to make the relationship easier and happier for us both. Why can't he try?

Reply 6

Savage R3N3GAD3

2

[scroll] yep, that's her alright. i don't handle it well at all, i resort to name calling, shouting and swearing at her, then she cries and gets upset and beats me up, then we fall out. im very bad at dealing with it all. sometimes i say sorry, often i give up and just say nothing, i always make things worse, i don't know what to say [/scroll]

[scrollr] whats my limit for entertaining her moodiness? i cant stand it at all, even the tiniest slightest hint of negativity sets me off and makes me feel disappointed and i say something bad in response and upset her, i cant play along and sit back and entertain that sort of behaviour. used to, but it didn't do any good so i changed my approach [/scrollr]

Reply 7

kka25

OP

18

Original post by Savage R3N3GAD3

[scroll] yep, that's her alright. i don't handle it well at all, i resort to name calling, shouting and swearing at her, then she cries and gets upset and beats me up, then we fall out. im very bad at dealing with it all. sometimes i say sorry, often i give up and just say nothing, i always make things worse, i don't know what to say [/scroll]

[scrollr] whats my limit for entertaining her moodiness? i cant stand it at all, even the tiniest slightest hint of negativity sets me off and makes me feel disappointed and i say something bad in response and upset her, i cant play along and sit back and entertain that sort of behaviour. used to, but it didn't do any good so i changed my approach [/scrollr]

Reply 8

Savage R3N3GAD3

2

Original post by kka25

[scrollr] are you okay :po:

[/scrollr]

Reply 9

Truflais

20

Cake and a handy jay.

Reply 10

SophieSmall

21

Original post by kka25

Let's say your partner is generally slightly moody and will get sulky with the slightest matter (e.g. not speaking to you if you were late for something, not remembering their birthdays, etc.); what do you normally do to get their attention? Do you apologies? Keep quiet as well?

What's your generally limit when entertaining their moodiness?

Of course this is under the assumption that you do want to be with your partner (so none of that 'I'll throw them out of the house and find another one' stuff).

My partner never gets sulky or moody with me. So honestly...no idea.

Though I would like to say I wouldn't exactly call forgetting your partners birthday "the slightest matter".

Reply 11

Fiduciam

12

Agree about the birthday thing not being slight lol.

I just apologise tbh.

Do you know what I hate though? When they try making you feel guilty (to an extent it's okay), srsly is that necessary m8. If I'm saying sorry - I know I messed up, I don't need you digging it in lol

Reply 12

SophieSmall

21

Original post by Fiduciam

Agree about the birthday thing not being slight lol.

I just apologise tbh.

Do you know what I hate though? When they try making you feel guilty (to an extent it's okay), srsly is that necessary m8. If I'm saying sorry - I know I messed up, I don't need you digging it in lol

When saying sorry be sure to always say what you are sorry for, rather than just say "sorry" say "I'm sorry I forgot you birthday".

Some people want to know their partner knows why they're apologising. Rather than just apologising to "fix" it.

Whenever I apologise to my SO I always say why I'm apologising. Though that's usually me just apologising because I feel bad, not because he's mad or anything.

Reply 13

Mihael_Keehl

15

delete their campaign history :biggrin:

Reply 14

Fiduciam

12

Original post by SophieSmall

When saying sorry be sure to always say what you are sorry for, rather than just say "sorry" say "I'm sorry I forgot you birthday".

Some people want to know their partner knows why they're apologising. Rather than just apologising to "fix" it.

Whenever I apologise to my SO I always say why I'm apologising. Though that's usually me just apologising because I feel bad, not because he's mad or anything.