Can't take it any more? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 3 years ago
#1
I'm literally loosing the will to live, my mental health is awful at the moment and all I can think about is how crap my life is. It's got to the point where I keep thinking about death and what it would be like to die, although I don't think I could bring myself to do anything.
This probably sounds like such an overreaction but basically I absolutely hated secondary school, the only thing getting me through it was knowing that I was going to have a great time at sixth form.
However I feel SO SO SO lonely, depressed and isolated at sixth form- the teachers are alright and everything but I hate the atmosphere, I hate that there aren't a range of different people (it's one of the best sixth forms in the country so as you can imagine it's quite middle class/studious). I really don't fit in- I don't come from a wealthy family and I'm very eccentric and completely non-accademic- I don't even get how I got in. It's so difficult to make friends because everyone stays in their friendship groups and people are either in a big 'cool' group even though there are like 1500 people in our year, or really geeky and well behaved and studious and I'm not like any of them. I basically spend my whole life trying to talk to people who aren't interested or wondering around by myself looking at people with big groups of friends and wishing I could be them.
What's making it 10 times worse is the fact that I had originally planned to go this other sixth form which isn't as good academics wise but is meant to have a really good atmosphere and everyone who I know goes there really loves it. It's much more diverse and ever since I enrolled at the other sixth form I've really really regretted my decision- something tells me I could have had an amazing time at the other sixth form- someone even told me I was far more suited to it and they could see me fitting in really well.
I can't stop thinking about how I've ruined my life by making such a stupid decision- I can't believe I threw my chance to be happy away. It's all I can think about- I keep seeing everyone who goes there and thinking they look like really nice, kind people, not like all the snobs at this sixth form) and they all seem really happy and I keep seeing people who go there and they tell me they really like it... I keep daydreaming and imagining what it would be like if I went there... I even have dreams about it lol ok this is really embarrassing and ridiculous but I'm so desperate, I'm so sick of having no life.
I used to think that sixth form would be like Skins (which I know is totally unrealistic) and I can't even watch it anymore because in reality the sixth form I'm at is nothing like it.
I feel so depressed. I have no friends, I've missed so much school, I have no motivation to do work and everyone keeps asking where I am.
Because the sixth form I'm at is apparently 'so good' and has really high expectations it's not like I can get away with missing lessons much longer. I'm terrified I'll get kicked out and then I'll have nothing
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Anonymous #2
#2
Report 3 years ago
#2
Hi, It sounds like your going through something I did a few years ago. The first thing you need to keep in mind is that your life is not over, so what if you made a mistake in picking the right sixthform for you, the great thing about the school system here is that you can enroll on any course for free till your eighteen. My advice to you is to speak to your tutors or the sixthform/college you want to go to and tell them that you either want to leave and the reasons why no matter how embarrassing; or about your options in either transferring next year if your grades pick up or starting anew in the place that you wanted to go to. I wish you all best and hope things get better for you, just don't forget that your not the only one who goes through this and it's not the end of your future. 😃
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Anonymous #3
#3
Report 3 years ago
#3
Don't feel as if you've ruined your life by making the decision to go to this sixth form.

I'm not a medical professional, but you definitely need to see someone. You seem very depressed to me. You need help.
You need to talk to your school,also. I don't know their policies, but their might be a chance that they will kick you out. Please talk to someone. Is there no chance to change to the other sixth form?
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DrSocSciences
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#4
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Impossible as it seems, there will come a time in your future when you can look back at this time and realise that it was a moment in your life, rather than your life.
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RiahDawson
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#5
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I'm literally loosing the will to live, my mental health is awful at the moment and all I can think about is how crap my life is. It's got to the point where I keep thinking about death and what it would be like to die, although I don't think I could bring myself to do anything.
This probably sounds like such an overreaction but basically I absolutely hated secondary school, the only thing getting me through it was knowing that I was going to have a great time at sixth form.
However I feel SO SO SO lonely, depressed and isolated at sixth form- the teachers are alright and everything but I hate the atmosphere, I hate that there aren't a range of different people (it's one of the best sixth forms in the country so as you can imagine it's quite middle class/studious). I really don't fit in- I don't come from a wealthy family and I'm very eccentric and completely non-accademic- I don't even get how I got in. It's so difficult to make friends because everyone stays in their friendship groups and people are either in a big 'cool' group even though there are like 1500 people in our year, or really geeky and well behaved and studious and I'm not like any of them. I basically spend my whole life trying to talk to people who aren't interested or wondering around by myself looking at people with big groups of friends and wishing I could be them.
What's making it 10 times worse is the fact that I had originally planned to go this other sixth form which isn't as good academics wise but is meant to have a really good atmosphere and everyone who I know goes there really loves it. It's much more diverse and ever since I enrolled at the other sixth form I've really really regretted my decision- something tells me I could have had an amazing time at the other sixth form- someone even told me I was far more suited to it and they could see me fitting in really well.
I can't stop thinking about how I've ruined my life by making such a stupid decision- I can't believe I threw my chance to be happy away. It's all I can think about- I keep seeing everyone who goes there and thinking they look like really nice, kind people, not like all the snobs at this sixth form) and they all seem really happy and I keep seeing people who go there and they tell me they really like it... I keep daydreaming and imagining what it would be like if I went there... I even have dreams about it lol ok this is really embarrassing and ridiculous but I'm so desperate, I'm so sick of having no life.
I used to think that sixth form would be like Skins (which I know is totally unrealistic) and I can't even watch it anymore because in reality the sixth form I'm at is nothing like it.
I feel so depressed. I have no friends, I've missed so much school, I have no motivation to do work and everyone keeps asking where I am.
Because the sixth form I'm at is apparently 'so good' and has really high expectations it's not like I can get away with missing lessons much longer. I'm terrified I'll get kicked out and then I'll have nothing
Stop thinking that the other sixth form is much better. It's not. Everyone at your school can't be very studious. You'll eventually find a group of friends just keep trying to talk to people in your classes and then hang out at lunch. If that fails just concentrate on studying and getting into a good uni. Afterall sixth form will only last for 2 years and it already has passed so quickly anyway. Even if you went to the other sixth form it's unlikely youd stay in contact with people from there after you finish.

School just isn't like the movies. High school musical? Nope, no one ends up dancing midway through the day. So it's not going to end up being like Skins. The other sixth form wouldnt be like that either.

Stop missing lessons purposely and just try to catch up. I'm guessing you go to a grammar school?
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