Was I right to do this to a friend?

Last week I went to a club with one of my friends. We're not that close as friends but she is in the same classes as me so we talk every now and then at uni.

During the course of the night we got quite drunk. Near the end she asked if there was any space in my flat to crash because she lived too far away to go home alone. I live with another guy so there was no space apart from my room so i offered that she sleep on the floor in my room and she accepted.

I told my friends that I was going home early to help my drunk friend home and they kept encouraging and egging me on to 'plough her tonight' and 'get action'. I must admit it was very tempting because she was all over me that night.

So to cut a long story short, we took the bus home and got back to my flat. I laid down a spare mattress for her and I was still tempted to make a move on her but something told me that it wasn't a good idea. First, I didn't have protection and second she was one of my friends and things could have been awkward at uni.

Was I right to do this? I feel that I missed out on having it with this girl because all my mates think I'm a pussy now. I think she would have been up for it the way she was behaving to me that night but i didn't do it...

OH MY GOSH.

Okay, this was the absolute right thing to do. What the **** is wrong with your friends!? She was drunk, therefore would not have been able to offer proper consent to having sex. If you really want to sleep with her, then get to know her first as more than friends. You said that both of you were quite drunk, who's to say that she wasn't flirting with you just because of the alcohol? Gosh, you made the right decision. Who cares if your mates think you're a pussy, at least you're not a dick.

Last week I went to a club with one of my friends. We're not that close as friends but she is in the same classes as me so we talk every now and then at uni.

During the course of the night we got quite drunk. Near the end she asked if there was any space in my flat to crash because she lived too far away to go home alone. I live with another guy so there was no space apart from my room so i offered that she sleep on the floor in my room and she accepted.

I told my friends that I was going home early to help my drunk friend home and they kept encouraging and egging me on to 'plough her tonight' and 'get action'. I must admit it was very tempting because she was all over me that night.

So to cut a long story short, we took the bus home and got back to my flat. I laid down a spare mattress for her and I was still tempted to make a move on her but something told me that it wasn't a good idea. First, I didn't have protection and second she was one of my friends and things could have been awkward at uni.

Was I right to do this? I feel that I missed out on having it with this girl because all my mates think I'm a pussy now. I think she would have been up for it the way she was behaving to me that night but i didn't do it...

such a pussy

OH MY GOSH.

Okay, this was the absolute right thing to do. What the **** is wrong with your friends!? She was drunk, therefore would not have been able to offer proper consent to having sex. If you really want to sleep with her, then get to know her first as more than friends. You said that both of you were quite drunk, who's to say that she wasn't flirting with you just because of the alcohol? Gosh, you made the right decision. Who cares if your mates think you're a pussy, at least you're not a dick.

You did absolutely the right thing. She was drunk and potentially unable to consent.

Neither of you had condoms so you could possibly have contracted an STD.

Allowing her to sleep at your flat was a very decent thing to do, especially as by the sounds of it she was so drunk that she may not have been able to make it home safely.

Ignore your friends. You did the right thing.
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Why anyone thinks having sex with someone who is drunk is ok, I don't understand? It's rape ffs.

He was drunk too and she was the one making the advances, so it's not really possible for it to be rape when they're both intoxicated and tempted to sleep together.
If they're both drunk and end up having sex, that's a one night stand. Rape is forcing yourself on them after they have made it clear that they didn't want to. Where exactly did you get your definition of rape from? Tumblr?

No, I'm not that dumb.

Okay I just feel because she's quite a fit girl I won't get another chance like that to have sex with her. But after what you said it makes sense... I didn't have condoms so it could resulted in something worse than a ruined friendship

I am so confused by the responses in this post. If she said yes to sex whilst drunk, then how is she categorised as 'potentially unable to consent'? She is responsible for her own actions. If he forced himself upon her then it would be a different story.

In that case it sounds like she nearly raped him too since they were equally drunk and, to all appearances, equally up for sexing.

As far as I know test cases for rape take a cautious approach. Usually it is only held to be rape if there is evidence that consent could not be given such as inability to walk or periods of semi-consciousness. I see no indication either in law or common sense that it would have been rape if they had had sex.

OP failed to pick up on the not particularly subtle cues she was giving and actually went ahead and laid out a mattress for her etc. Even platonic friends would have shared a bed, I think, particularly in the heady first term of uni.

I think he can expect her affections to cool rather quickly after bottling it so easily.