Girlfriend kissed another guy during truth or dare...am I overreacting? Watch

Anonymous #1
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My girlfriend was at a party last night, clearly playing some sort of drinking game. I have received a text this morning saying "Had to kiss <name> in a game".

This has actually hit me really hard. We've been together almost 2 years and I have never kissed another girl for any reason, and certainly wouldn't kiss a girl during a drinking game.

I mean, we're 21 years old, we're not 15 anymore.

I don't know if I'm overreacting that I feel so hurt at the moment, and I'm not sure if I should say anything to her. If I don't, she'll not realise how this is actually really hurtful. If I do, she'll think I'm overreacting.

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maggie43
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My girlfriend was at a party last night, clearly playing some sort of drinking game. I have received a text this morning saying "Had to kiss <name> in a game".

This has actually hit me really hard. We've been together almost 2 years and I have never kissed another girl for any reason, and certainly wouldn't kiss a girl during a drinking game.

I mean, we're 21 years old, we're not 15 anymore.

I don't know if I'm overreacting that I feel so hurt at the moment, and I'm not sure if I should say anything to her. If I don't, she'll not realise how this is actually really hurtful. If I do, she'll think I'm overreacting.

No, you're not overreacting. What she did wasn't right. Dump her

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TaintedLight
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Reply something like this

"That's ok baby, Jake last night also sort of dared me to have sex with Tina. Obviously she has accepted the challenge; I'm excited. Will see you tomorrow"
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angelcake123
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She could have easily said "nope, I have a boyfriend" or not even played at all, knowing that she'd eventually have to do something with another guy. What she has done has made things worse for your relationship because now, the next time she goes to a party, you wont trust her. From then onwards, it just gets worse and worse.

You arent overreacting, and if she cant see that and uses the whole "it didnt mean anything" excuse then wow. If you end up apologising for this, this will just get worse.
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tazarooni89
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I think you should let her know that you appreciate her telling you about it, but that you don't feel comfortable with her doing things like that even during drinking games, and nicely ask her not to in future. Then leave it at that.

There's a lot to be said about the fact that she told you of her own accord, and so casually as well. She's thinking that what she did is acceptable, as long as she tells you about it afterwards. It's not that she's knowingly doing something inappropriate - because if she were, she'd be more wary of telling you. It wasn't done out of any lack of loyalty towards you, but just out of a bit of immaturity. I think you and her have different ideas on where exactly the boundaries are, so you just have to talk to her to clarify it.
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Anonymous #1
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Thanks for the responses, it's good to get a sanity check that I'm not overreacting. She's still there so when she gets home I'll call her and tell her how I feel. Hopefully she'll just say sorry and that she understands and doesn't tell me i'm overreacting. I don't want to lose the relationship or anything over this, it's just so unlike her :/
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TheBBQ
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(Original post by angelcake123)
She could have easily said "nope, I have a boyfriend" or not even played at all, knowing that she'd eventually have to do something with another guy. What she has done has made things worse for your relationship because now, the next time she goes to a party, you wont trust her. From then onwards, it just gets worse and worse.

You arent overreacting, and if she cant see that and uses the whole "it didnt mean anything" excuse then wow. If you end up apologising for this, this will just get worse.
Exactly this. It is disgraceful behaviour.
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Anonymous #1
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I also need to figure out what kiss means, as the type of kiss really matters. But I guess it'll be hard to get the truth
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Zarek
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Ease up folks. People are human and drunken faux pas do happen with this, ill advised, game. I don't think it's the same as getting off with someone and unless she secretly fancies the pants off the guy or is deliberately trying to provoke jealously then it is a minor demeanour. I would get a few more facts, weigh up and tell her how you feel and then get on with it.
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angelcake123
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I also need to figure out what kiss means, as the type of kiss really matters. But I guess it'll be hard to get the truth
I dont think it does. I know this may hurt, but think of the actual scene, what actually happened. Odds are, once they kissed, she may have smiled or laughed. I doubt she kissed him, pulled a frustrated face and moved on to the next round. She says she "had" to kiss him, no she did not have to do anything. She didnt even have the decency to call you, but just a quick text like it wasnt important.

If you focus on what kiss it was, she may lie and say "oh it was just a peck" to water down the situation.
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ByronicHero
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For me it would depend on the kind of kiss. A standard kiss on the lips would bother me infinitely less than something more inherently passionate.

If you want to be with her, and you otherwise trust her then this is probably something worth moving past.
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Yaboy Mugabe
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lmao are you stupid or something

dump the slut

if she can't control her self when drinking then she shouldn't drink

****ing hell at the terrible advice in this thread, move on.
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ClitYeastWood
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Gosh I love these scenarios.

Let's have little role reversal shall we?


Can you imagine your GF's reaction if you sent her a text saying "I made out (or kissed) with a girl, but don't worry it was a dare so it doesn't count".

Yeah, now you can tell that you aren't overreacting. Dump her.
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ClitYeastWood
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(Original post by DiceTheSlice)
Reply something like this

"That's ok baby, Jake last night also sort of dared me to have sex with Tina. Obviously she has accepted the challenge; I'm excited. Will see you tomorrow"
Top kek.
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Conzy210
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Two years together and she does something like this, and thinks it's acceptable?

Can't believe you're even considering staying together. She's made a complete fool of you.


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Zarek
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(Original post by ClitYeastWood;[url="tel:61398563")
61398563[/url]]Gosh I love these scenarios.

Let's have little role reversal shall we?


Can you imagine your GF's reaction if you sent her a text saying "I made out (or kissed) with a girl, but don't worry it was a dare so it doesn't count".

Yeah, now you can tell that you aren't overreacting. Dump her.
Making out would be different from a fleeting peer encouraged public drinking game kiss. If this is the case then it's still shows disrespect but, in my view, would not be an automatic dumping offence in an otherwise good relationship. Mind you this could be the start of a slippery slope..
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ClitYeastWood
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(Original post by Zarek)
Making out would be different from a fleeting peer encouraged public drinking game kiss. If this is the case then it's still shows disrespect but, in my view, would not be an automatic dumping offence in an otherwise good relationship. Mind you this could be the start of a slippery slope..
Doesn't change the fact that she could have said "no".

Why I would risk the chance that it could happen again or worse? She's gone.
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silverbolt
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I also need to figure out what kiss means, as the type of kiss really matters. But I guess it'll be hard to get the truth
I agree there, was is a quick peck on the mouth or a full on passionate with tongues groping each other kind of kiss?

I dont think your over reacting as your mind is naturally going to assume the worst. However after two years she should know you well enough to know how youd react. It is disrespectful but to me it depends on the situation. Everyone drinking and egging each other on.

You know your partner better than any of us OP, how confident you are in your own relationship, so its up to you to decide once youve spoken to her how to proceed.
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TheBBQ
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(Original post by Yaboy Mugabe)
lmao are you stupid or something

dump the slut

if she can't control her self when drinking then she shouldn't drink

****ing hell at the terrible advice in this thread, move on.

Also this,
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Zeeiqbal
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She is not appreciating you being there in her life. Not going to lie, Know your worth. She does love you but she thinks that you will always stay by her side. Overreact, she is your gf and you care. Tell her that it isn't a little thing that she seems so calm about it. Tell her how you feel and don't say sorry. I am always having to say sorry to my bf when we argue despite his fault.. :L
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