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No real love life - ever
Now I no some people will reply and say it doesnt matter, which is probably doesnt, but for me it does matter. And it annoys me.
Problem 1: I have never had a GF in my life. I'm straight, I want a gf, or something, but never had one. Im 19 and a uni! All around me I see relationships, and people going home to their girlfriends and at uni we have a few relationships in our hall. And its really starting to piss me off.
Problem 2: I'm a vigin. Yup, on top of that, ive not had a one night stand. I think im only bothered about a lack of a girlfriend, because ive never got laid period.
Problem 3: The most ive done with a girl is kiss them. I no, it gets worse. Next ill be telling you I have no ears!
So thats basically it. And it really gets me down, and pisses me off. In my whole life Ive asked maybe 5 girls out (which may not help) but every time I get the 'just want to be friends' excuse/comment. It annoys me because they dont want to go out with me for reasons, not just because of the friendship, I want to know these reasons. I have more than enough friends, arg.
I have kissed TWO girls. Woo. Go me. One like a year ago, another like 5 years ago. Ive asked 3 girls out in the last year, all said no.
I always go out at uni, im sociable, funny and make people laugh. Im not damn right ugly, Im (if being modest) probably a bit better than average (maybe), but I guess I have my sights maybe a bit too high. But still, 2/3 of the girls I asked out Id say would have been in my 'league' (I know the whole league thing is bull****) but you know what I mean.
No one wants a relationship at uni, yet lots of people are in one. I dont really want a relationship, I want SOMETHING and Im getting NOTHING.
I honestly do not know what else I could do. My whole uni floor is lads, which doesnt help, but then there are lots of floors with girls on and I know a lot of them on those floors, and I no a lot of girls on my course. But every single one is either in a relationship or doesnt like me in that way.
Now life may not be about love, but I see it like this: Whats the point in living life if nobody loves you in a way more than just a friend. I know, my whole life ahead of me, but if 14 year old chavs can get laid and so can teenage mothers, what the hell is my problem.
I dont know why im posting, well I do I want 2 tell some1 but I feel as if I cant as if its something to be ashamed of, when its not, but its not exactly something to be proud of. I jsut hate the fact of it.
Problem 1: I have never had a GF in my life. I'm straight, I want a gf, or something, but never had one. Im 19 and a uni! All around me I see relationships, and people going home to their girlfriends and at uni we have a few relationships in our hall. And its really starting to piss me off.
Problem 2: I'm a vigin. Yup, on top of that, ive not had a one night stand. I think im only bothered about a lack of a girlfriend, because ive never got laid period.
Problem 3: The most ive done with a girl is kiss them. I no, it gets worse. Next ill be telling you I have no ears!
So thats basically it. And it really gets me down, and pisses me off. In my whole life Ive asked maybe 5 girls out (which may not help) but every time I get the 'just want to be friends' excuse/comment. It annoys me because they dont want to go out with me for reasons, not just because of the friendship, I want to know these reasons. I have more than enough friends, arg.
I have kissed TWO girls. Woo. Go me. One like a year ago, another like 5 years ago. Ive asked 3 girls out in the last year, all said no.
I always go out at uni, im sociable, funny and make people laugh. Im not damn right ugly, Im (if being modest) probably a bit better than average (maybe), but I guess I have my sights maybe a bit too high. But still, 2/3 of the girls I asked out Id say would have been in my 'league' (I know the whole league thing is bull****) but you know what I mean.
No one wants a relationship at uni, yet lots of people are in one. I dont really want a relationship, I want SOMETHING and Im getting NOTHING.
I honestly do not know what else I could do. My whole uni floor is lads, which doesnt help, but then there are lots of floors with girls on and I know a lot of them on those floors, and I no a lot of girls on my course. But every single one is either in a relationship or doesnt like me in that way.
Now life may not be about love, but I see it like this: Whats the point in living life if nobody loves you in a way more than just a friend. I know, my whole life ahead of me, but if 14 year old chavs can get laid and so can teenage mothers, what the hell is my problem.
I dont know why im posting, well I do I want 2 tell some1 but I feel as if I cant as if its something to be ashamed of, when its not, but its not exactly something to be proud of. I jsut hate the fact of it.
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Unless you have some terrible medical condition, or get killed in a car crash, you have years left.
It may matter to you, but fussing won't solve it. Women don't find despirate men attractive. Even if you don't act despirate, we can tell.
So relax, forget about women and suddenly, you'll be cheating on your pregnant wife with insanely cute Japenese twins.
It may matter to you, but fussing won't solve it. Women don't find despirate men attractive. Even if you don't act despirate, we can tell.
So relax, forget about women and suddenly, you'll be cheating on your pregnant wife with insanely cute Japenese twins.
Hey,
Just to say that I know EXACTLY how you feel. I'm a girl, and I'm not a virgin but I feel like I have no love life whatsoever. I got rejected recently by a friend of mine who told me he 'wasnt looking for a relationship' and 'still had feelings for his ex' which was a bunch of crap in my opinion, I know he doesn't want to hurt my feelings but I wish he'd just tell me the truth, that he doesn't think I'm attractive or whatever. The league thing is bull**** in my opinion in this case too cos in my opinion, and in most other peoples opinions I was way more attractive than he was anyway.
People think that a love life just magically appears at uni but the sad fact of it is - IT DOESNT. A lot of people are still shy, a lot of people are just looking for sex, and a LOT of people are in relationships. I know a huge number of people that are (the latter). I've met a great deal of guys at uni and I honestly have not had one relationship since I've been here, not even close.And there's nothing wrong with me either, I would say I'm quite attractive anda nice person...
Just to say that I know EXACTLY how you feel. I'm a girl, and I'm not a virgin but I feel like I have no love life whatsoever. I got rejected recently by a friend of mine who told me he 'wasnt looking for a relationship' and 'still had feelings for his ex' which was a bunch of crap in my opinion, I know he doesn't want to hurt my feelings but I wish he'd just tell me the truth, that he doesn't think I'm attractive or whatever. The league thing is bull**** in my opinion in this case too cos in my opinion, and in most other peoples opinions I was way more attractive than he was anyway.
People think that a love life just magically appears at uni but the sad fact of it is - IT DOESNT. A lot of people are still shy, a lot of people are just looking for sex, and a LOT of people are in relationships. I know a huge number of people that are (the latter). I've met a great deal of guys at uni and I honestly have not had one relationship since I've been here, not even close.And there's nothing wrong with me either, I would say I'm quite attractive anda nice person...
im pretty sure most people are in similar situations, just dont want to admit it.
iv not really had and relationships either. and yeh, i'm getting all the coupley people round about me to. can get just a tad annoying....
just try not to think about it. the more you obsess it could affect how you're talking to girls. just relax, be yourself and you'll find a girl in no time.
...
sounds soooo simple doesnt it? now remember it, and repeat it to me in a few days when i set up a similar "why cant i get a guy" thread.
iv not really had and relationships either. and yeh, i'm getting all the coupley people round about me to. can get just a tad annoying....
just try not to think about it. the more you obsess it could affect how you're talking to girls. just relax, be yourself and you'll find a girl in no time.
...
sounds soooo simple doesnt it? now remember it, and repeat it to me in a few days when i set up a similar "why cant i get a guy" thread.
Firstly... relax.
Secondly, waiting does not solve anything. Those who say "they'll find you." are naive or lying. You have to maximise your chances. Go and find that person!
Realistically, this is a simplistic sentiment, as I myself am stuggling to find someone I really like. I've met a myriad of lovely girls but none really 'do it' for me and hence, still at square one.
Complaining about it will get you nowhere either. Get off your arse and do something. Asking five girls is obviously not enough, so keep asking until someone bites!
Now you're wondering why I say 'relax'? When by it's nature that is contradictory to the advice I'm giving. Far from it.
Pulling a quote from Scubs: "Sometimes wanting something so badly is the quickest way to lose it."
Just chill out because desperation is not attractive. Confidence is. Just relax and keep your eyes open.
I'm not going to say "you'll meet someone eventually" because, although it is true, it is the most worn out cliché in the existance of mankind.
Just relax. These things have a habit of cropping up when you least expect or want them.
Secondly, waiting does not solve anything. Those who say "they'll find you." are naive or lying. You have to maximise your chances. Go and find that person!
Realistically, this is a simplistic sentiment, as I myself am stuggling to find someone I really like. I've met a myriad of lovely girls but none really 'do it' for me and hence, still at square one.
Complaining about it will get you nowhere either. Get off your arse and do something. Asking five girls is obviously not enough, so keep asking until someone bites!
Now you're wondering why I say 'relax'? When by it's nature that is contradictory to the advice I'm giving. Far from it.
Pulling a quote from Scubs: "Sometimes wanting something so badly is the quickest way to lose it."
Just chill out because desperation is not attractive. Confidence is. Just relax and keep your eyes open.
I'm not going to say "you'll meet someone eventually" because, although it is true, it is the most worn out cliché in the existance of mankind.
Just relax. These things have a habit of cropping up when you least expect or want them.
OP it sounds like you're trying to get any girl, doesn't matter who just for the sake of losing your virginity. Luckily none of them agreed to go out with you because it soon would've become obvious that you don't care about getting to know them as people and that wouldn't be fair on them if they liked you. I expect you come across as very desperate as you seem to be asking out every girl you meet. If you genuinely want a relationship you simply can't force these things. However, you can significantly up your chances by not making it so obvious what you're agenda is and pretending to be relaxed about it (if you can't be the real thing). There's a boy just like you in my hall and he is a laughing stock among the girls because of his desperate antics. Don't let that be you.
Anon 2; be honest with yourself- you would feel awful if a guy said he didn't want to go out with you because he thinks you're unattractive even if that was the reason. Are you sure that's what you'd rather hear from them?
Anon 2; be honest with yourself- you would feel awful if a guy said he didn't want to go out with you because he thinks you're unattractive even if that was the reason. Are you sure that's what you'd rather hear from them?
I felt like this, I thought there was no way I was gonna get a girlfriend... I had been single for over three years and hadn't really had a 'proper' love interest, it really, really sucked... however one day (and I knew on ther day I met her!) I met this girl at work, became friends with her over a coupel of weeks, stayed at hers as a friend and just watched DVD's all night, and eventually it grew from that. Before that I thought I was gonna be single for the rest of my life, it really was a crap place... sitting at home with nothing to do, calling mates and have them say "Sorry I'm out with my girlfriend" eventually though someone meets the person they are meant to be with... just keep positive and if you meet someone you like talk to them... don't be all desperate and do the creepy ask them out thing within a day of knowing them, become friends... it'll happen, don't worry
Maybe your entitlement complex is putting girls off? I mean, who'd go out with a guy who is pissed off with the world because he hasn't had his rightful ration of sex? It's not a right, it's supposed to be an enjoyable extra. Maybe you think about it too much.
It could be that you're just unlucky, other people's relationships are a result of mutual fancying, and perhaps no-one in your social network fancies you. So broaden your network and treat your lady friends well. If you don't want a relationship, you can't expect lots of lasses throwing themselves at you. Some of us don't like commitment, but a lot of girls would rather achieve girlfriend/boyfriend status before sex at the least, no-one wants a bad reputation.
It could be that you're just unlucky, other people's relationships are a result of mutual fancying, and perhaps no-one in your social network fancies you. So broaden your network and treat your lady friends well. If you don't want a relationship, you can't expect lots of lasses throwing themselves at you. Some of us don't like commitment, but a lot of girls would rather achieve girlfriend/boyfriend status before sex at the least, no-one wants a bad reputation.
Oh, advice... err... right:
The reason girls want to be friends with you is that they like you as a friend - ie, you are funny, pleasant, nice and at least have some sort of conversational ability - as you recognised in your post. Well done.
But they don't find you attractive. Now since I don't have a clue what sort of person you are, I can hardly analyse why this is. But really, it tends to be down to three main factors: not being hideously ugly, being quite confident and not being submissive.
There you go. Enjoy.
The reason girls want to be friends with you is that they like you as a friend - ie, you are funny, pleasant, nice and at least have some sort of conversational ability - as you recognised in your post. Well done.
But they don't find you attractive. Now since I don't have a clue what sort of person you are, I can hardly analyse why this is. But really, it tends to be down to three main factors: not being hideously ugly, being quite confident and not being submissive.
There you go. Enjoy.
Schmokie Dragon
suddenly, you'll be cheating on your pregnant wife with insanely cute Japenese twins.
Anonymous
Problem 1: I have never had a GF in my life. I'm straight, I want a gf, or something, but never had one. Im 19 and a uni! All around me I see relationships, and people going home to their girlfriends and at uni we have a few relationships in our hall. And its really starting to piss me off.
Get off your fat ass and do something about it.
Anonymous
Problem 2: I'm a vigin. Yup, on top of that, ive not had a one night stand. I think im only bothered about a lack of a girlfriend, because ive never got laid period.
Get off your fat ass and do something about it.
Anonymous
Problem 3: The most ive done with a girl is kiss them. I no, it gets worse. Next ill be telling you I have no ears!
Do you need to ask my advice on this one?
Basically, when I started off I got shot down more than the taliban airforce. But did that stop me trying? No.
So far you've kissed 2 girls, and been rejected by 3. Thats a 40% success rate (if you count kissing as success, which you do). So whats stopping you asking another 5 girls? Thats 2 more kisses. And another 5? Every time you ask someone, you're improving. Soon you'll have a 50% success rate, then a 60% success rate. Hell, in a few decades you'll be as good as me.
If you want to get good at football, what do you practice? If you want to get good at running, what do you practice? So what makes you think you'll suddenly have good game, if you're sitting on your fat ass crying about it? Go out there and practice, come back in a few months time and I'll let you complain if you're still ****.
I know how it feels. But you really just have to get yourself into situations where it can happen. Believe me mate if I'm getting more than you then you're doing something very wrong because my looks are pretty dire.
If you're just milling about with people on your course and people you know from your halls then you're probably coming in contact with maybe 50 girls maximum. Assume 50% of them are in relationships or don't like boys then and you're down to 25. And you're likely to be in environments where relationships are not on peoples minds - the statistics are virtually impossible.
Now, if you go to a couple of bars and a club on a night out you're going to be in contact with 100s of somewhat drunk girls and a lot of them will only be thinking about one thing. The odds are way better. And you can try it on safe in the knowledge you're not going to make a friendship awkward and with a bit of alcohol down you you'll be much more confident (usually).
One thing about alcohol though is don't overdo it. I ruined a very promising 'relationship' because I was so drunk when I saw this girl and got her number but could not remember what she looked like nor meeting her lol. So the next week I walked right past her about 4 times and the texts soon stopped after that lol. ah well
If you're just milling about with people on your course and people you know from your halls then you're probably coming in contact with maybe 50 girls maximum. Assume 50% of them are in relationships or don't like boys then and you're down to 25. And you're likely to be in environments where relationships are not on peoples minds - the statistics are virtually impossible.
Now, if you go to a couple of bars and a club on a night out you're going to be in contact with 100s of somewhat drunk girls and a lot of them will only be thinking about one thing. The odds are way better. And you can try it on safe in the knowledge you're not going to make a friendship awkward and with a bit of alcohol down you you'll be much more confident (usually).
One thing about alcohol though is don't overdo it. I ruined a very promising 'relationship' because I was so drunk when I saw this girl and got her number but could not remember what she looked like nor meeting her lol. So the next week I walked right past her about 4 times and the texts soon stopped after that lol. ah well
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