Best friend told her boyfriend about my depression

One of my best friends of 10 years has been going out with her boyfriend for a couple of years now. He's at her uni so I don't know him that well, but he's enough of a friend that I probably would've told him had it ever come up in general conversation. It came out yesterday before a NYE party we both went to that he knows already. Is it an overreaction to be upset that my friend told him? It's just upset me a bit because, even though I probably would've told him anyway, she discussed something that should have been kept between me and her unless I'd said she could pass it on. It's the principle more than anything. I know they're together but I just feel a bit betrayed that she didn't keep something that personal to herself, if that makes sense.

I personally would be very upset about it, but don't overreact until you know exactly what she said. She probably wanted to know more about depression, or discussed the topic with her boyfriend and just mentioned you had it. Talk to her about it, don't let it harm the friendship you have as slips like this occur.

No, you weren't overreacting by being upset about this. I would feel very hurt if my best friend did something like this. I would definitely speak to her about it, and tell her that you didn't appreciate her telling him about your depression. If she's that much of a good friend, she will apologise.

You have the right to be upset and I think I'd feel the same way as it's your business expressed in confidence however I'm sure she didn't mean it in a malicious way, she may have even been looking for a way to help you as weird as that sounds, I'd let her know that it has upset so she can apologise and doesn't do it in future but I wouldn't let it ruin a 10 year friendship, I'm sure you'll work it out

yeah id be upset too but when you lay in the sheets with someone you become very close to them so its understandable, tell her youre p****ed though and she'll apologise

I was talking to him yesterday about whether I could take pills (generally) 6 hours earlier than I had been because I wasn't entirely sure I'd remember at midnight (for probably obvious reasons...) and he asked what they were, and I said my contraceptive pill and my antidepressants, then he said 'oh yeah, of course, I knew you were on antidepressants' and there's no way he could've known except my friend.





She probably didn't mean it in a malicious way, I just feel really upset about it because she knows how secretive I was about it at first (I'm a lot more open about it now); she knows how long it took me to get used to 'officially' having depression and how weird it made me feel. it's the principle of it really

Yes, I think it is reasonable of you to be upset.

I know due to the subject it should perhaps have been obvious to keep it private, but did you specifically tell her not to tell anyone else?

Yeah, she knew to keep it quiet, even from our other best friend (we're a really close group of 3)

I suppose if you look it in that way it can be negative, but you have to look at her intentions. She didn't mean to hurt you, and neither did her boyfriend.

Yeah I would be annoyed in that scenario. As you say, it's not information that should impact her bf's life in any way, so there's no real pressing reason for her to break your confidence.

I was talking to him yesterday about whether I could take pills (generally) 6 hours earlier than I had been because I wasn't entirely sure I'd remember at midnight (for probably obvious reasons...) and he asked what they were, and I said my contraceptive pill and my antidepressants, then he said 'oh yeah, of course, I knew you were on antidepressants' and there's no way he could've known except my friend.





She probably didn't mean it in a malicious way, I just feel really upset about it because she knows how secretive I was about it at first (I'm a lot more open about it now); she knows how long it took me to get used to 'officially' having depression and how weird it made me feel. it's the principle of it really

Not to the point where it's okay to share something your best friend's told you in confidence though, especially not when it doesn't concern your SO (imo). I never would've told my ex or the guy I'm seeing atm anything like that idk

Honestly, I can totally understand how you feel, you're not overreacting, I hope you work it out