Is Going back remotely right?

I will try and keep this short because if not i know it would turn really long and a bit intricate but ok.

i been 8 months with my girlfriend and to be honest we never once argued and had a very smooth relationship in what our feelings for each other were concerned, however as of 3-4 months back we been having a lot of presure and problems from outside sources e.g my best mate, my family and hers too.

In what her personality and attitude towards me are concerned she is always been loving, caring, a good friend etc, not a complaint from me BUT when it comes to other people including her family im sorry to say she has a really rotten attitude and think she can do whatever she likes and this really does not help our situation and has made worse in some ways and to be honest is pretty draining on me if you sum that up to Uni and my job.

So to the problem.About a week and a half ago i got invited to go out with my best mate, his cousin and one of her mates. His cousin had been flirting with me all night and to be honest i was flirting back but with no real intention(im normally like that :redface:

) so we had a few drinks and the night went on as normal, when it was time to go home it was rather late for me to go back home plus i was skint so this other mate offered that we could stay at hers for the night.

So on the way back to hers we took a taxi and when we got on a few minutes later my mates cousin (called girl A for now) turn around just kissed me but veyr quickly :eek:

i didnt really responded to it right then and i let it pass. When we got to this girl´s house we had to all sleep on the same bedroom, my mate when to sleep on the floor almost straight away and me and the other 2 stayed up talking a while, after, the other girl decided she was going to sleep on the floor too and i know you might not believe me but there really wasnt space for one more on the floor in that room so i stayed on the bed with girl A and needless to say my maleness gave in and what had to happened happened.

So next day we all went home normally and nothing important was said between me and girl A about what happened and we left it like that.
After this well i obviously felt really guilty and two days later i finished with my girlfriend because i thought it wasnt fair but i didnt finish her telling her what happened, instead i told her because we needed to distance ourselves a while because of all the problems we had and stuff( which is really the truth as well)i just ( cowardly i know ) neglected to mention what happened that night, she didnt have much to say, needless to say she was sad but accepted it so we left it as being friends.

We kept talking alot but i really couldnt clear my concience and afew day later i told her what had happened, she said she was not surprised etc got a bit angry ( yes just a lil bit :confused:

) nothing much was said and we carried on talking normally.

Few days later she asked me to come round to hers for all the things she had burrowed off me and some other stuff, so i went round and weeping and sobbing she asked me to go back with her :eek:

so i wanted some advice since im a bit confused... 1 it seems weird to me she wants me back after what i did,

2 im truly sorry and feel bad for what i did, i love her to bits and do miss her but i really think going back with her would make things awkard and that kind of thing never really gets forgotten even if its forgiven and without trust it would be pointless and im pretty sure she wont trust me as much now obviously.

and 3 we also have alot of problems from other sources and all of this would just be more preasure in our relationship.

what do you think? Should i try and give it another go or just simply say is not going to get fixed :confused:

( just for the record im not interested in girl A at all and i dont think she is on me either since she also has a boyfriend)

P.S ty if you did manage to read all that... so much for short :redface:

Reply 1

matt@internet

If you don't feel it could work, and you don't feel she could ever forgive you, then tell her that.

Reply 2

featheredblack

obv. she realises that you are sorry for whaat you have done and prob. thinks you will not do it again. id say you are in a steady relationship, and with the rest of the probs... well they will get sorted eventually, its just sticking together is the main thing. do you really want to throw it all away. as for her "doing what she pleases" talk through it together. state the problem, say you are finding it hard to deal with, understand where she is coming from. THEN, get back together. i hope all works out and you have learnt your lesson and will avoid all situations like that in the future

Reply 3

SmilerNuts

yeah, you need to sit down and talk it through and fix all the problems. make it no holds barred, get it all out in the open about how you feel and if she has any hidden feelings get them out too.
Cheating on someon doesn't have to be the end of a relationship, as long as it doesn't happen again and she has truly forgiven you and isn't gonna pretend it's all ok but then let it get worse inside her head. it will take time but you can make it work if that's what you want