The Student Room Group

Boyfriend's wandering eye....

Help!

Everything is going so wrong, not the way I planned!
Basically, I've been going out with a guy for like 3 months and tbh. the relationship has been rather volatile at times. He can be quite moody etc. However, when he is nice and in a good mood he is the best guy ever. The thing is, I think I love him :redface:
But.. recently there is this other girl and she blatently flirts with him ALL THE TIME. This doesn't bother me that much, however, then I asked him if I wasn't there would he be interested in anyone else? It was a kind of jokey, flirty question demanding no other answer but 'no one but you'. Instead, he said, ' oh 'X' girl, without a doubt, she is so hot' :'(
My heart sank and I just kinda went quiet. He didn't reiterate how much he wanted me, nothing! He just sat there with a serene expression on his face, kinda grinning!
Should I confront him or leave it be??

xxx

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Reply 1
What a weirdo...leave?
Reply 2
*le sigh* hes just stood in front of you and completly disresepcted you and your feelings. Do you really think hes worth it? Really? REALLY?
Reply 3
Urm, he's being honest.

Do you have any real, and I mean more than just harmless flirting as evidence not to trust him?

Christ! Not all blokes think with their dick.
Reply 4
oh come on! there are much more tactful ways of saying you quite like the look of another person if your in a relationship, like by not saying anything :rolleyes:
Reply 5
If you love him that much, talk with him about it...if it was said in a jokey fashion, he may not have quite realised how much his response affected you.
I seriously wouldn't waste another minute of my time. As much as you might "think" you love him, he doesn't sound like a particularly good catch - I'd just tell him it's not working out (or some other over-used, cliche line) then get back out there to find yourself a hot bloke!

Whatever the case, that comment was totally disrespectful. He obviously knows very well it would upset you - something you'll have to get used to if you stick around, love.

Seriously. Show him the door. ^o)
Reply 7
Right, you ask a question, he is honest and you get all angry? You said if you weren't there, ie didn't exist. He still prefers you over her, I am guessing although I can't say for sure.

I hate how women ask something expecting a 'jokey' answer.
Reply 8
Maybe he was just joking? Your best bet would be to confront him in my opinion. If he was being serious, leave him!
Reply 9
tbh i hate women who ask a question just so a bloke pays her a compliament. She didnt get a compliament and he told her what he thought, but thats so damn tactless
Reply 10
Trigger
tbh i hate women who ask a question just so a bloke pays her a compliament. She didnt get a compliament and he told her what he thought, but thats so damn tactless


situation 1
'Do you like my hair? Be honest' after getting it done.
'Not particularly, sorry'
'OMFG'

situation 2
'do you like my hair? Be honest'
'yes it's great'
'Be honest'
I appreciate that some of you think he may have been joking, or perhaps he was simply being honest. To be fair though, what kind of reaction did he expect with an answer like that? OP said she was sat there looking upset whilst this guy was grinning to himself.. I can just picture the type of man who would do that - and I'd be a million miles away from him already.
Reply 12
to be fair, he didn't really do anything wrong. you asked a hypothetical question, he gave a hypothetical (albeit, tactless) answer. There's nothing really to 'confront' him about.

personally, though, i couldn't be with a guy who didn't respect my feelings enough not to be so tactless, however, so perhaps a personality clash is more the issue at hand here, rather than his honesty and lack of tact.

PS do not, repeat, NOT fish for compliments. It's annoying and can only end in tears!
Reply 13
Everyone knows that if it was a guy saying his gf had said she'd get with guy X you'd all be saying "she was clearly joking. I'm sure she loves you blah blah".
I Would Kill Him!!!!!!!!!!
You're silly. You asked him a question which meant if you didn't exist who would he go for - Obviously he's not going to say you in this case, or anything relating to you since you don't even exist anymore. Now, when he's honest you complain about it? It's a lose-lose situation for him here.
Reply 16
He's just keeping his options open, obviously he's ready to settle down with one just girl. Maybe this is a hint to you....
Reply 17
I used to tell my ex how hot other girls are all the time, but then i reassured her that she's a much better person and she's very beautiful..and that i'd rather have her than any other girl, at least then i was being honest..and not filling her with bull**** like that she's the sexiest/cutest girl in the world..better than FHM's top 100.
Guys eyes will wonder, you can't deprive us of that, jesus.
Reply 18
Gaz.
Guys eyes will wonder, you can't deprive us of that, jesus.

Exactly.
sounds like he was joking tbh