This discussion is now closed.
Check out other Related discussions
- girls answer this
- Girls, do you actually enjoy anal....?
- Why would girls watch Pornography ?
- I drunkenly kissed another girl, can he forgive me?
- A question for straight men
- Watched a lot of porn
- Is it normal for best female friend to kiss each other (both straight)?
- EPQ Topic: Dentistry Related or Passion Related?
- Questioning my sexuality yet not sexually attracted to men
- Good introductory books on LGBT Law for EPQ?
- India Willoughby reports jk rowling to the police
- My girlfriend just left me because I’m too small for her
- Uni virgin
- IB re-mark appeal
- Why do I fantasise about having s3x with people
- Approaching girls at the club
- Why can't I make my girlfriend orgasm?
- What kind of degree should I get?
- Guys who can't 'finish' from sex
- Is it too late to appeal my bus fine?
Sex doesn't appeal
Well I am not a virgin, I have just come out of a quite long relationship (15 months) and am feeling really disillusioned about sex.
By the media and basically everyone I've ever met, sex is a huge thing and a very important part of relationships. Yet I slept with my boyfriend, I 'you know whatted' practically every time and yet I find it boring. It is a hassle and just not that fun in my opinion. I feel like I'm totally confused about why people consider it such a big deal. He isn't the only person I've ever slept with so it's not just him.
Does anyone else feel this way? What if when I'm older and get married I always feel it? Out of relationships I crave sex but the thought of a sexual relationship just makes me feel stifled.
xx
By the media and basically everyone I've ever met, sex is a huge thing and a very important part of relationships. Yet I slept with my boyfriend, I 'you know whatted' practically every time and yet I find it boring. It is a hassle and just not that fun in my opinion. I feel like I'm totally confused about why people consider it such a big deal. He isn't the only person I've ever slept with so it's not just him.
Does anyone else feel this way? What if when I'm older and get married I always feel it? Out of relationships I crave sex but the thought of a sexual relationship just makes me feel stifled.
xx
Scroll to see replies
Did your bf(s) want sex a lot? You sound like someone who's just fed up of sex maybe through having an overtly sexual partner? Sex isn't such a big deal - if you don't like it that much then that's your personal preference - don't worry about it.
boys-play-rock-and-roll
Whoa you are scarily like me. I was with my ex for nearly 2 years and I found sex was just something I did to keep him happy, it never felt as special as the media built it up to be.
He saw it as an upgrade of a ****, which was probably why.
He saw it as an upgrade of a ****, which was probably why.
Was he really obsessed with sex?
He didn't want sex a lot. But if I stopped at his it was like we had to do it. And 'boys-play-rock-and-roll' that's exactly how I felt. Something to keep him happy. But I told him how I felt, I don't think he understood really.
xx
xx
Why did you feel like you had to do it when you went over his? Did he pressure you into it?
Just like, lying in bed together, he'd always try and initiate. I couldn't say 'i'm tired' or 'i'm not in the mood' forever. Do you not feel that pressure?
Sometimes sex was such a drag for me, because my ex didn't really bother with foreplay, so I was tense and dry. He would finish pretty quickly and roll over and go to sleep. I didn't care that the sex was painful and that I didn't orgasm. I just wanted a hug at the end of it, as a sort of reassurance that he loved me. I guess it was too much to ask. 
Yes I'm sure I think it's a pretty distinctive feeling and yeah it is great, but I would much rather go and do something like go for a walk or have a conversation than do something like that. Sometimes I feel like I'm too young for it and maybe I wasn't ready but like I've already said he wasn't my first. I had some pretty **** sexual encounters before him.
Not doing it right?
OP i feel quite the same.
For everyone that feels like this, I advise you do a google search for "asexuality". You are not alone. And there are loads of support groups that can help 
Personally, I love sex. There's no more intimate way to get close to your partner. The feeling of skin upon skin, person within person, is electric.
Personally, I love sex. There's no more intimate way to get close to your partner. The feeling of skin upon skin, person within person, is electric.
Anonymous
Just like, lying in bed together, he'd always try and initiate. I couldn't say 'i'm tired' or 'i'm not in the mood' forever. Do you not feel that pressure?
No, sometimes my bf will really want to have sex or do something, but there's never any pressure, and if he knows I'm not up to it because of stress or having too much work to do then he's fine with it, he'll back off and there'll be no pressure. It sounds like your bf just seems too obsessed with the physical side of things as someone said. And perhaps your other experiences were too? Don't worry about marriage - when you find the right person, you'll feel comfortable with them and they won't pressure you into doing anything you don't want to.
On the other hand, I think guys have much higher sex drives than girls in general. Most always seem to want more on the physical side of things whereas girls would rather have love and attention more a lot of the time.
spacecowgirl89
On the other hand, I think guys have much higher sex drives than girls in general. Most always seem to want more on the physical side of things whereas girls would rather have love and attention more a lot of the time.
On the other hand, I think guys have much higher sex drives than girls in general. Most always seem to want more on the physical side of things whereas girls would rather have love and attention more a lot of the time.
Yeah thats true, wouldn't life be so much easier if men and women had the same sex drives? lol
haha yeah! sometimes though, I seem to have a higher sex drive than him, I guess it's just what kind of mood you're in/they're in. I think guys tend to feel after sex that they can just crash out and fall asleep without acknowledging you too...which really hurts girls, but I don't think they realise it. I know my bf didn't before I told him that I'd like a hug/kiss afterwards just to say thanks, that was nice, and then he can go off and sleep/do whatever.
Related discussions
- girls answer this
- Girls, do you actually enjoy anal....?
- Why would girls watch Pornography ?
- I drunkenly kissed another girl, can he forgive me?
- A question for straight men
- Watched a lot of porn
- Is it normal for best female friend to kiss each other (both straight)?
- EPQ Topic: Dentistry Related or Passion Related?
- Questioning my sexuality yet not sexually attracted to men
- Good introductory books on LGBT Law for EPQ?
- India Willoughby reports jk rowling to the police
- My girlfriend just left me because I’m too small for her
- Uni virgin
- IB re-mark appeal
- Why do I fantasise about having s3x with people
- Approaching girls at the club
- Why can't I make my girlfriend orgasm?
- What kind of degree should I get?
- Guys who can't 'finish' from sex
- Is it too late to appeal my bus fine?
Latest
Trending
Last reply 3 weeks ago
How can I apply for university and get my letters without my parents finding outLast reply 4 weeks ago
Dealing with and keeping lies to my aggressive parentsLast reply 1 month ago
(Serious) How do I get rid of weird feelings with my boobs and femininity?Last reply 1 month ago
For those of you who have younger cousins or nieces and nephews why do you do this?Fitness
6
8
Last reply 1 month ago
People who claim to wash in 5mins aren’t showering properlyLast reply 1 month ago
2024 has been a horrible year for me overall and I just wanted your thoughtsLast reply 2 months ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.
