Hey,
Just looking for some advice - basically me and my b/f have been together for nearly a year and a half. We moved in together quite quickly and things were fab for the first 6 months or so, we then kinda got stuck in a rut. We moved away and were both working full tme for the first time - in jobs neither of us liked that much and were spending ALL our time together, but not going out, just sitting in watching tv every night and our sex life dried up completely, and we biccered a lot.
About 6 weeks ago - we moved back home, where our friends are, and our arguing increased, and we both started going out more and stuff and our sex life got a bit better. Unfortunately, one night we were boh drunk and I looked at his phone and found some dirty texts from a girl. I confronted him about this and he said it was just text flirting and he was just messing about. After a lot of soul searching, I decided to forgive him and we talked everything through and it stemmed from us being in a rut and we decided to start doing things together and things have been really good since we had our heart to heart.
The only problem is, is that our sex life has not improved and he wont talk about it - we cuddle up, and hint at a lot of things, but whenever I try and get down to it - he pulls away and get annoyed because I am putting to much pressure on him, and I cant help but feel rejected. This combined with the fact that he spends a lot of time online (secretively) and I am stll working on building up the trust that I lost b4 is making me very paraniod - and I am stuck wondering i the only reason our sex life improved b4 is because he was getting turned on by those texts.
Its really difficult, coz he says he loves me all the time and is really sorry about what he did, and he doesn't have to stay with me, as his friends have offered to put him up (They dont like me anyway) but he's still here. Also we are moving to Belfast together ( For uni) and we both dont know anyone there and he gave up staying at home with his friends to move away with me, and he is really excited about the move.
All these things, combined with the fact that I really love him - makes my paranoia so stressful. Things are getting better, but I stll have this niggling in the back of my mind - prob exacerbated by the lack of a sex life.
We are both looking forward to wiping the slate clean and moving to belfast, but i've got a horrible feeling that this paranoia will eat away at me and destroy everything and I'll be stuck in a strange city on my own with no friends.
Any advice??
p.s sorry bout the rambling