My fiance asked a work colleague for her number.
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Original post by anosmianAcrimony
Luckily, though, that does not appear to be what's going on.
Yup, hopefully it all works out for OP
Original post by trapking
Youre clearly still a little girl who dates little boys. You're not ready for real men bye
Youre clearly still a little girl who dates little boys. You're not ready for real men bye
Wait so what you're saying is that her idea of loyal men in adult relationships who aren't cheating pricks are actually little boys and real men will jump at any opportunity of their partner gives them enough of a chance? Sure reads like it...it isn't naive to think someone adding someone as a Facebook friend doesn't mean they'll cheat on you with them.
Original post by trapking
Youre clearly still a little girl who dates little boys. You're not ready for real men bye
and you're quite clearly a suspicious controlling little boy. Enjoy the paranoia
bye(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Jenx301
and you're quite clearly a suspicious controlling little boy. Enjoy the paranoia bye
bye Looks like I hit a nerve? hahaha
I don't date little girls like you....I date women who know where to draw the boundaries. I don't need to tell them anything they just know and I certainly don't waste my time talking to some girl with a profile pic of lesbians
Won't reply after this....adios!
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by trapking
Looks like I hit a nerve? hahaha
I don't date little girls like you....I date women who know where to draw the boundaries. I don't need to tell them anything they just know and I certainly don't waste my time talking to some girls with a profile pic of lesbians
Won't reply after this....adios!
I don't date little girls like you....I date women who know where to draw the boundaries. I don't need to tell them anything they just know and I certainly don't waste my time talking to some girls with a profile pic of lesbians
Won't reply after this....adios!
Don't let the door hit you on the way out
Original post by Alexion
Y'know, people are allowed to make friends...
Nah it's not the same thing. It can be quite upsetting to be talked to like that. I'm good at reading people and sometimes when someone talks about another person it's obvious that there is more to it, indeed they might not even notice it themselves.
Original post by Anonymous
I have a feeling my fiance likes his work colleague. I'm not sure if I'm just worrying over nothing but the whole situation makes me uncomfortable.
A new girl started working at the place he works. They are both engineers. I started becoming suspicious when he mentioned a new person had started working there as loads of new people start and he has never mentioned anyone before.
He had to go on a visit to a prison and he asked me if I could pick him up at the end of the day. I was waiting in the car and they both came out of the building. He went to leave and then said he was concerned about how she would get back (she doesn't drive but was getting a lift back) and asked if she could take his number so she could text him to say she was safely home. The prison is a bit out of the way and he may have felt responsible for her safety somewhat but she did have the office number. She took his number. To be fair he did then say he was going to look for his fiancee as she was picking him up so he has obviously told her he is with someone which I don't think he would have done if he was interested in her so I kind of forgot about it all then until today.
I went onto our computer and he's searched her on facebook. My heart sank just then but I don't want to question him about it and seem irrational. I asked him if the new girl was single and he said that she was a single parent. he'd asked her if she was still with her daughter's dad (why would he even be interested in knowing that). He seems to remember the tiny details or what she says and will openly tell me about them in the evening. He hasn't yet offered to drive her home but that might be the next thing if he becomes more interested. When she messaged to say she was home safely he didn't reply and he hasn't messaged her by phone but that may be because he knows it would be unprofessional.
He's a gentlemanly guy but he seems to have over stepped the line between gentlemanly and flirty. Or am I being unreasonable? Would you consider these points concerning? Maybe he is attracted to her but doesn't want anything more. She is a single parents and he's only mid twenties so I would be surprised if he would want to get involved with someone with baggage but she is pretty and elegant from what I saw.
He's not the type to cheat so would end it with me if he was interested.
Is this normal behaviour for a man who finds a woman attractive but doesn't want anything with her? Or are these the signs of something more? She's only been there 9 days!
A new girl started working at the place he works. They are both engineers. I started becoming suspicious when he mentioned a new person had started working there as loads of new people start and he has never mentioned anyone before.
He had to go on a visit to a prison and he asked me if I could pick him up at the end of the day. I was waiting in the car and they both came out of the building. He went to leave and then said he was concerned about how she would get back (she doesn't drive but was getting a lift back) and asked if she could take his number so she could text him to say she was safely home. The prison is a bit out of the way and he may have felt responsible for her safety somewhat but she did have the office number. She took his number. To be fair he did then say he was going to look for his fiancee as she was picking him up so he has obviously told her he is with someone which I don't think he would have done if he was interested in her so I kind of forgot about it all then until today.
I went onto our computer and he's searched her on facebook. My heart sank just then but I don't want to question him about it and seem irrational. I asked him if the new girl was single and he said that she was a single parent. he'd asked her if she was still with her daughter's dad (why would he even be interested in knowing that). He seems to remember the tiny details or what she says and will openly tell me about them in the evening. He hasn't yet offered to drive her home but that might be the next thing if he becomes more interested. When she messaged to say she was home safely he didn't reply and he hasn't messaged her by phone but that may be because he knows it would be unprofessional.
He's a gentlemanly guy but he seems to have over stepped the line between gentlemanly and flirty. Or am I being unreasonable? Would you consider these points concerning? Maybe he is attracted to her but doesn't want anything more. She is a single parents and he's only mid twenties so I would be surprised if he would want to get involved with someone with baggage but she is pretty and elegant from what I saw.
He's not the type to cheat so would end it with me if he was interested.
Is this normal behaviour for a man who finds a woman attractive but doesn't want anything with her? Or are these the signs of something more? She's only been there 9 days!
what I bolded and searching her on Facebook--- first stages of catching feelings in my opinion. You're not uncomfortable for no reason listen to your gut. Why is it his concern if she gets home safely, he's crossing boundaries.
Honestly, I'd say he's into her but doesn't really realise himself yet, and when he does he'll feel kinda bad about it. My gut feeling is that this isn't about cheating, he just sounds a bit taken with her. If he was intending to cheat I don't think he'd talk to you about her. I'd leave it alone for a bit because chances are he'll get bored (because there's no room or motivation for it to go anywhere) and suddenly you'll realise he hasn't mentioned her in ages.
There's a fine line between being paranoid and just being savvy. It's probably a passing attraction which will feel a bit ****, but it's probably not the end of the world in the grand scheme of things. If he keeps going on about her and it's really upsetting you then call him out, but only if it's causing real problems.
There's a fine line between being paranoid and just being savvy. It's probably a passing attraction which will feel a bit ****, but it's probably not the end of the world in the grand scheme of things. If he keeps going on about her and it's really upsetting you then call him out, but only if it's causing real problems.
Original post by Anonymous
I have a feeling my fiance likes his work colleague. I'm not sure if I'm just worrying over nothing but the whole situation makes me uncomfortable.
A new girl started working at the place he works. They are both engineers. I started becoming suspicious when he mentioned a new person had started working there as loads of new people start and he has never mentioned anyone before.
He had to go on a visit to a prison and he asked me if I could pick him up at the end of the day. I was waiting in the car and they both came out of the building. He went to leave and then said he was concerned about how she would get back (she doesn't drive but was getting a lift back) and asked if she could take his number so she could text him to say she was safely home. The prison is a bit out of the way and he may have felt responsible for her safety somewhat but she did have the office number. She took his number. To be fair he did then say he was going to look for his fiancee as she was picking him up so he has obviously told her he is with someone which I don't think he would have done if he was interested in her so I kind of forgot about it all then until today.
I went onto our computer and he's searched her on facebook. My heart sank just then but I don't want to question him about it and seem irrational. I asked him if the new girl was single and he said that she was a single parent. he'd asked her if she was still with her daughter's dad (why would he even be interested in knowing that). He seems to remember the tiny details or what she says and will openly tell me about them in the evening. He hasn't yet offered to drive her home but that might be the next thing if he becomes more interested. When she messaged to say she was home safely he didn't reply and he hasn't messaged her by phone but that may be because he knows it would be unprofessional.
He's a gentlemanly guy but he seems to have over stepped the line between gentlemanly and flirty. Or am I being unreasonable? Would you consider these points concerning? Maybe he is attracted to her but doesn't want anything more. She is a single parents and he's only mid twenties so I would be surprised if he would want to get involved with someone with baggage but she is pretty and elegant from what I saw.
He's not the type to cheat so would end it with me if he was interested.
Is this normal behaviour for a man who finds a woman attractive but doesn't want anything with her? Or are these the signs of something more? She's only been there 9 days!
A new girl started working at the place he works. They are both engineers. I started becoming suspicious when he mentioned a new person had started working there as loads of new people start and he has never mentioned anyone before.
He had to go on a visit to a prison and he asked me if I could pick him up at the end of the day. I was waiting in the car and they both came out of the building. He went to leave and then said he was concerned about how she would get back (she doesn't drive but was getting a lift back) and asked if she could take his number so she could text him to say she was safely home. The prison is a bit out of the way and he may have felt responsible for her safety somewhat but she did have the office number. She took his number. To be fair he did then say he was going to look for his fiancee as she was picking him up so he has obviously told her he is with someone which I don't think he would have done if he was interested in her so I kind of forgot about it all then until today.
I went onto our computer and he's searched her on facebook. My heart sank just then but I don't want to question him about it and seem irrational. I asked him if the new girl was single and he said that she was a single parent. he'd asked her if she was still with her daughter's dad (why would he even be interested in knowing that). He seems to remember the tiny details or what she says and will openly tell me about them in the evening. He hasn't yet offered to drive her home but that might be the next thing if he becomes more interested. When she messaged to say she was home safely he didn't reply and he hasn't messaged her by phone but that may be because he knows it would be unprofessional.
He's a gentlemanly guy but he seems to have over stepped the line between gentlemanly and flirty. Or am I being unreasonable? Would you consider these points concerning? Maybe he is attracted to her but doesn't want anything more. She is a single parents and he's only mid twenties so I would be surprised if he would want to get involved with someone with baggage but she is pretty and elegant from what I saw.
He's not the type to cheat so would end it with me if he was interested.
Is this normal behaviour for a man who finds a woman attractive but doesn't want anything with her? Or are these the signs of something more? She's only been there 9 days!
Okay. Wow. WOAH!!! Slow down a little bit, I think someone has jumped the gun! Fear not, for I am here to put your fears to rest.
- For some unknown reason, you jumped to the wrong conclusion that he has flirted with her. You don't have any reason to believe that he has flirted with her. He hasn't said he's flirted with her, you haven't seen him flirting and you haven't been told by anyone that he's been flirting. The logical assumption to make is that he's not doing anything wrong because you have no evidence or reason to believe that. I'm not really sure why you jumped the conclusions that you did!
- How do you know he finds her attractive? Again, jumping to very odd conclusions. He hasn't said he's attracted to her.
- All he has done is talk to a woman. You wouldn't be making a fuss if it was a man. There's nothing wrong with a man talking to a woman! It's perfectly harmless. Let's look at the sequence of events. He talked to her, wanted her to text him to let him know that she's okay, and he has told you things about her...nothing wrong with any of that.
- Your heart "sank" when you found out he searched her on the internet??! I mean, really?! Your heart "sank"?! To say the very least, that's a severe overreaction!!! Massive overreaction. He didn't even message her or send her a friend request. Didn't even poke her! If he searched for a man on facebook you wouldn't have cared, but now it's a huge problem because it's a woman. Shaking my head.
- It sounds like you have some serious trust issues and some very serious paranoia. You've jumped to some very strange and completely irrational and groundless conclusions and made some very odd assumptions despite having zero evidence and absolutely no reason to think that he's up to no good.
Unless you uncover some hard evidence of wrongdoing, proceed as normal and assume that everything is okay. Give him the benefit of the doubt. You have no reason to be worried. You're feeling uncomfortable but that's your problem, not his. You need to sort out your paranoia problem and don't bring it into the relationship because he doesn't need to be dealing with that. He is allowed to talk to any woman he wants, it's just talking! You wouldn't bat an eyelid if he was talking to another man, but all of a sudden it's a problem just because it's a woman.
Yes, you are being extremely unreasonable. Here's how this works - you can only start to be suspicious of someone if you have real proof that they're doing something wrongwrong, or if they have a history. He has done absolutely nothing wrong here! Nothing that he has done should give you a reason to be suspicious. Your problem is that he's talking to a woman and you don't want him to talk to women. That's what's bothering you here, the simple fact that he's talking to a woman. You need to address this problem with your attitude.
It's fair to say that you've overreacted extremely severely to absolutely nothing. There's literally nothing there! The poor guy didn't do anything wrong! Go easy on him. Don't lose your trust in him when he hasn't given you any reason to doubt him
(edited 8 years ago)
Original post by Jenx301
Not being harsh but I think you are reading into it too much. Doesn't sound suspicious to me.
- He asked for her number so she could tell him she got home safe
- He told her he has a fiancee
- He looked for her on facebook
- He tells you stuff she says
- he hasn't replied to her messages
Sounds like he is just a nice person who has been friendly with a work colleague. I can't see anything that makes me think he is cheating and you said yourself he isn't the type to do it. I search everyone on facebook, lots of people do.... and he is allowed to have female friends. Telling him not to is a bit controlling and paranoid.
- He asked for her number so she could tell him she got home safe
- He told her he has a fiancee
- He looked for her on facebook
- He tells you stuff she says
- he hasn't replied to her messages
Sounds like he is just a nice person who has been friendly with a work colleague. I can't see anything that makes me think he is cheating and you said yourself he isn't the type to do it. I search everyone on facebook, lots of people do.... and he is allowed to have female friends. Telling him not to is a bit controlling and paranoid.
I'm frankly quite shocked that there are 100 people on this thread saying "OMG HE'S CHEATING HE DEFINITELY LOVES HER HE SHOULDN'T BE DOING THAT HE IS BAD" but only two people who actually see what's really going on. Lol TSR!
Hi can I ask how much he earns as an engineer. Also he may just be interested in her as she is attractive but kind of knows she is off limits if that makes sense,
Well turns out my suspicions were right. He left me last week and is now officially in a relationship with his work colleague. He didn't ask her out or do anything until after he had ended our engagement and I believe him as he just isn't that type.
I knew the moment I saw them together. I had been with him years and just knew there were feeling developing from his side.
I knew the moment I saw them together. I had been with him years and just knew there were feeling developing from his side.
Original post by Anonymous
Well turns out my suspicions were right. He left me last week and is now officially in a relationship with his work colleague. He didn't ask her out or do anything until after he had ended our engagement and I believe him as he just isn't that type.
I knew the moment I saw them together. I had been with him years and just knew there were feeling developing from his side.
I knew the moment I saw them together. I had been with him years and just knew there were feeling developing from his side.
I'm sorry to hear that...
Posted from TSR Mobile
Original post by Jenx301
Not being harsh but I think you are reading into it too much. Doesn't sound suspicious to me.
- He asked for her number so she could tell him she got home safe
- He told her he has a fiancee
- He looked for her on facebook
- He tells you stuff she says
- he hasn't replied to her messages
Sounds like he is just a nice person who has been friendly with a work colleague. I can't see anything that makes me think he is cheating and you said yourself he isn't the type to do it. I search everyone on facebook, lots of people do.... and he is allowed to have female friends. Telling him not to is a bit controlling and paranoid.
- He asked for her number so she could tell him she got home safe
- He told her he has a fiancee
- He looked for her on facebook
- He tells you stuff she says
- he hasn't replied to her messages
Sounds like he is just a nice person who has been friendly with a work colleague. I can't see anything that makes me think he is cheating and you said yourself he isn't the type to do it. I search everyone on facebook, lots of people do.... and he is allowed to have female friends. Telling him not to is a bit controlling and paranoid.
Original post by Alexion
Y'know, people are allowed to make friends...
Original post by danalwill
Jheez he's just making friends, what's wrong with that?
Original post by Savage R3N3GAD3
I'm frankly quite shocked that there are 100 people on this thread saying "OMG HE'S CHEATING HE DEFINITELY LOVES HER HE SHOULDN'T BE DOING THAT HE IS BAD" but only two people who actually see what's really going on. Lol TSR!
You guys must feel really stupid now
Original post by Anonymous
Well turns out my suspicions were right. He left me last week and is now officially in a relationship with his work colleague. He didn't ask her out or do anything until after he had ended our engagement and I believe him as he just isn't that type.
I knew the moment I saw them together. I had been with him years and just knew there were feeling developing from his side.
I knew the moment I saw them together. I had been with him years and just knew there were feeling developing from his side.
Really sorry to hear that
Original post by Mentally
You guys must feel really stupid now
I was about to say the same!!
To the OP: I'm so sorry, you must be devastated. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk about this, even if it's just to vent a bit. Trust your instincts OP! Things will get better.
Thanks for the replies. I appreciate them.
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