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Mysticmin
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#21
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#21
(Original post by Butterfly)
I feel really sorry for people who are very shy because there isn't that much you can do about it really.
Yeah there is, it's just lack of confidence and can be dealt with.
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Fly By
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#22
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#22
(Original post by Butterfly)
I feel really sorry for people who are very shy because there isn't that much you can do about it really.
you could make them feel better and talk to them
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Butterfly
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#23
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#23
I suppose so but it takes a lot of time and it's not easy. I think I used to be quite shy but suppose I just grew out of it?
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Flicker
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#24
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#24
(Original post by Pixelfairy #1)
I've just been searching through the threads looking for something about how to stop being shy

I'va always been shy but its getting ridiculous now because I can talk to people online no problem... but on the phone or irl i never talk much And I can't work-out why not... I just never know what to say

Has anyone got any tips on how to be less shy for me please
i used to be shy then felt like you, one day just thought "right enough is enough". i find i have to act, kind of...put on a front and pretend i'm confident, if that makes sense, and then everyone thinks i am and it's ok. stand up straight and relax your shoulders, and take a deep breath and smile, then walk into a room full of people and everyone will think you're confident. just pretend you are and then gradually you will be. i haven't explained that very well, i'm sorry. but keep making yourself do things you wouldn't normally do, and smile all the time, and over time you will feel more confident, as people compliment you and you do well. good luck!
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chocoboy
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#25
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#25
Life is like acting a play. Treat the audience as idiots! You are the king of the world!
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Fly By
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#26
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#26
(Original post by Butterfly)
I suppose so but it takes a lot of time and it's not easy. I think I used to be quite shy but suppose I just grew out of it?
yeah i'm a bit like that....i just find it easier now...
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_EMMA_
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#27
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#27
(Original post by Fly By)
yeah i'm a bit like that....i just find it easier now...
same here, i think that it has a lot to do with self confident. sometimes i'm more shy towards people that i know compared to someone that i just meet once.
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Fly By
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#28
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#28
(Original post by _EMMA_)
same here, i think that it has a lot to do with self confident. sometimes i'm more shy towards people that i know compared to someone that i just meet once.
yeah i knwo what you mean, people you meet just once you sort of know you aint gonna see them again. but the worse is when you see people you kinda know of them, but not really know them..make sense?

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_EMMA_
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#29
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#29
(Original post by Fly By)
yeah i knwo what you mean, people you meet just once you sort of know you aint gonna see them again. but the worse is when you see people you kinda know of them, but not really know them..make sense?

mmm it makes sense cause then they know you, not well but well enough to have already maked a picture of who you are.
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epson_5
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#30
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#30
(Original post by Pixelfairy #1)
I've just been searching through the threads looking for something about how to stop being shy

I'va always been shy but its getting ridiculous now because I can talk to people online no problem... but on the phone or irl i never talk much And I can't work-out why not... I just never know what to say

Has anyone got any tips on how to be less shy for me please
When you get tounge-tied just do what I do; have a big sip of vodka and shout "****!!!!!!!!" at them until they hang up.

Works like a mofo'n charm!
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glance
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#31
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#31
OK, so here's the scenario. You're at a party. There's a group of people standing around in the garden. Of the eight people in that group, you only know about two. There are two unbelievably hot girls in the group. They're all laughing and chatting, and you're standing awkwardly just outside the group. You really want to just be able to stride up to the group, crack a joke beautifully relevant to whatever they're talking about and revel in the laughter and the questions of "sorry, what's your name?" It seems so easy. Everyone else is doing it. Trouble is, you just can't think of anything to say. And you don't think your weeny voice will be heard amongst the shrieks of chatty laughter. So what do you do? First of all, stand up straight and shoulders back! You're bound to be all hunched up, hoping no-one will see you. Be tall. Dominate. Now at home, you should have already thought of subjects which you can talk about for days. If you haven't, that's your own fault, stupid you. So quickly remember your preplanned subjects, and a number of hilarious jokes. Stride up to the group, but don't make a complete ass out of yourself and blurt out some unfunny joke. Wait for a moment of vague silence and then enter their social circle, and say "Heya." Stop hunching! Be tall again! Don't shrink back! Dominate. Play it cool and listen to their conversation, making sure you say stuff and swing the conversation in different directions so that you can interject with your immense hilarity. Oh and then it will all just come out, and you'll be buzzing with happiness Once you're on a roll, you just can't stop...and you'll find yourself even engaging in conversation with the two hot girls, and maybe even get a little smile out of them....
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DazzYaaa911
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#32
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#32
(Original post by glance)
OK, so here's the scenario. You're at a party. There's a group of people standing around in the garden. Of the eight people in that group, you only know about two. There are two unbelievably hot girls in the group. They're all laughing and chatting, and you're standing awkwardly just outside the group. You really want to just be able to stride up to the group, crack a joke beautifully relevant to whatever they're talking about and revel in the laughter and the questions of "sorry, what's your name?" It seems so easy. Everyone else is doing it. Trouble is, you just can't think of anything to say. And you don't think your weeny voice will be heard amongst the shrieks of chatty laughter. So what do you do? First of all, stand up straight and shoulders back! You're bound to be all hunched up, hoping no-one will see you. Be tall. Dominate. Now at home, you should have already thought of subjects which you can talk about for days. If you haven't, that's your own fault, stupid you. So quickly remember your preplanned subjects, and a number of hilarious jokes. Stride up to the group, but don't make a complete ass out of yourself and blurt out some unfunny joke. Wait for a moment of vague silence and then enter their social circle, and say "Heya." Stop hunching! Be tall again! Don't shrink back! Dominate. Play it cool and listen to their conversation, making sure you say stuff and swing the conversation in different directions so that you can interject with your immense hilarity. Oh and then it will all just come out, and you'll be buzzing with happiness Once you're on a roll, you just can't stop...and you'll find yourself even engaging in conversation with the two hot girls, and maybe even get a little smile out of them....
or let the hot girls come to you
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Hipocrit
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#33
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#33
(Original post by DazzYaaa911)
or let the hot girls come to you
You may be waiting some time if all you are doing is sitting hunched in a corner.
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Pixelfairy #1
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#34
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#34
Thanks everyone for your help.... and from reading the replies I'm definitely going to try being more confident... hopefully it will work I suppose its not going to come overnight... it's just something i've got to work at
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DazzYaaa911
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#35
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#35
(Original post by Hipocrit)
You may be waiting some time if all you are doing is sitting hunched in a corner.
well then stand up and make yourself presentable
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material breach
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#36
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#36
(Original post by Pixelfairy #1)
Thanks everyone for your help.... and from reading the replies I'm definitely going to try being more confident... hopefully it will work I suppose its not going to come overnight... it's just something i've got to work at
body language says alot, keep eye contact and your head up and generally relax as if you were looking at yourself in the mirror
and be confident about your self, and talk about things you know you no one is going to argue over, it will increase your confidence

alternatively been the great listener if you are afraid of talking, ask one quesiton and then listen to what they say and try to say something interesting about that before following it up with another question, asking questions gives you time to think as well
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soilman
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#37
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#37
Someone tell me, for what reason does DazzYaaa keep getting banned?

Thanks

S
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DazzYaaa911
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#38
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#38
(Original post by sm0273)
Someone tell me, for what reason does DazzYaaa keep getting banned?

Thanks

S
because i keep evading them, where do i know you from?
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kikzen
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#39
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#39
(Original post by Pixelfairy #1)
Thanks everyone for your help.... and from reading the replies I'm definitely going to try being more confident... hopefully it will work I suppose its not going to come overnight... it's just something i've got to work at
anything worth doing is hard.
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Whats_The_411?
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#40
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#40
(Original post by Pixelfairy #1)
Thanks everyone for your help.... and from reading the replies I'm definitely going to try being more confident... hopefully it will work I suppose its not going to come overnight... it's just something i've got to work at
You'll be fine.

Is there a reason why you are shy? I can relate to what you are saying, however, i have changed since i went to college and met new people. I needed to get away from my old school as i had a few issues with some people there, but thats all in my past now. Don't get me wrong i am still shy but is is nothing like the past. I did so much stuff to change, firstly i went to college and then i took many courses which worked on my confidence and communication. For example i did counselling courses and HSC courses as well as psychology. This has really helped me become more confident and assertive. You could try something like this. I mean i am now going to university in september and living in the halls. I couldn't have done this a year ago which just shows how much i've changed. This will be the top goal for me as i will be away from friends and family and meeting new people. I can't wait. You'll be fine.

All the best.
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