hyvtal
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OK so this is stressing me out more than I can handle as I know I'm running out of time. I'm meant to start a degree in September and I have no idea what to do with my living arrangements.
My year group went to university last September so I've been able to see how my peers were doing in their first year at the halls before I've actually been and now I'm torn to where I should be living next year.

I've been managing my own flat since I was 16 years old, meaning I've been living alone for 3 years now. Therefore I already own all of my furniture and I'm familiar with cooking, bills, cleaning etc. I also have anxiety, which normally means I prefer to have my own space when things get to much. I suffer from depression which is bad at times and I'm worried to which one of the two choices I have will cause me the most pain. I've noticed when I'm around animals I feel much better so I was going to get a pet cat or dog to help me. I'm also, shamefully, on benefits as it was the only way I could afford to live in my current flat at the time. When I go to uni I lose those benefits so I will have to move and use my student loan and get a job.

But anyway, so you probably see my dilemma. Halls or a new flat?

I've seen the buzz about the halls and the partying, drinking and making new friends. That sounds amazing given the fact I was bullied in both high school and college and having a shot at living a student life, finally fitting in and maybe combating my mental health issues seems sort of exciting and an opportunity I feel I'll regret if I let go.

But then you have the issues like the students partying EVERY night, keeping me awake. And the dirt in the kitchen and bathroom. And of course the lack of space and noise disturbance. Like, I'm not bragging but I'm 3 years ahead of them at the whole independence thing. I fear living in the halls will remove some of my independence and make me feel patronised or tormented. What if I don't fit in with my flat mates and feel left our or worse, singled out again? I don't know if I'll be able to cope with anymore abuse thrown at me. I've gone through enough. Then you have the whole issue of having to sell or bin my furniture as I can't take it all with me, just to re-buy some a year later when I move out of the halls. Plus the issue that I'll have nowhere to go during holidays and summer.

So I looked at the other alternative, moving to another flat and paying all the agency fees and my own rent which I'm not used to as I'm on housing benefit BUT I WANT TO GET OFF BENEFITS because I've felt trapped in them for 3 years unable to get a job and living in a flat would almost force me to work which I am very glad about. I'll be able to buy my cat and keep my boyfriend and best friend nearby, but have to travel to my uni everyday as I'd be out of city. And I know I probably won't make new friends, which will I regret? I'm a girl into computers, so yeah it's going to be a mainly male class. Which is why I fear if I don't move to the halls I'll regret forever.

See what I was saying about anxiety? This is really making me panic Sorry about my grammar I've rushed typed this out. What should I do?
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Neostigmine
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(Original post by hyvtal)
OK so this is stressing me out more than I can handle as I know I'm running out of time. I'm meant to start a degree in September and I have no idea what to do with my living arrangements.
My year group went to university last September so I've been able to see how my peers were doing in their first year at the halls before I've actually been and now I'm torn to where I should be living next year.

I've been managing my own flat since I was 16 years old, meaning I've been living alone for 3 years now. Therefore I already own all of my furniture and I'm familiar with cooking, bills, cleaning etc. I also have anxiety, which normally means I prefer to have my own space when things get to much. I suffer from depression which is bad at times and I'm worried to which one of the two choices I have will cause me the most pain. I've noticed when I'm around animals I feel much better so I was going to get a pet cat or dog to help me. I'm also, shamefully, on benefits as it was the only way I could afford to live in my current flat at the time. When I go to uni I lose those benefits so I will have to move and use my student loan and get a job.

But anyway, so you probably see my dilemma. Halls or a new flat?

I've seen the buzz about the halls and the partying, drinking and making new friends. That sounds amazing given the fact I was bullied in both high school and college and having a shot at living a student life, finally fitting in and maybe combating my mental health issues seems sort of exciting and an opportunity I feel I'll regret if I let go.

But then you have the issues like the students partying EVERY night, keeping me awake. And the dirt in the kitchen and bathroom. And of course the lack of space and noise disturbance. Like, I'm not bragging but I'm 3 years ahead of them at the whole independence thing. I fear living in the halls will remove some of my independence and make me feel patronised or tormented. What if I don't fit in with my flat mates and feel left our or worse, singled out again? I don't know if I'll be able to cope with anymore abuse thrown at me. I've gone through enough. Then you have the whole issue of having to sell or bin my furniture as I can't take it all with me, just to re-buy some a year later when I move out of the halls. Plus the issue that I'll have nowhere to go during holidays and summer.

So I looked at the other alternative, moving to another flat and paying all the agency fees and my own rent which I'm not used to as I'm on housing benefit BUT I WANT TO GET OFF BENEFITS because I've felt trapped in them for 3 years unable to get a job and living in a flat would almost force me to work which I am very glad about. I'll be able to buy my cat and keep my boyfriend and best friend nearby, but have to travel to my uni everyday as I'd be out of city. And I know I probably won't make new friends, which will I regret? I'm a girl into computers, so yeah it's going to be a mainly male class. Which is why I fear if I don't move to the halls I'll regret forever.

See what I was saying about anxiety? This is really making me panic Sorry about my grammar I've rushed typed this out. What should I do?


Work out how much money youll get and what you can afford.
Halls are not 365 days a year so you'll need to find something as soon as you finish the year. Shouldn't be too much trouble if you're working.

Don't forget you can always leave halls, you're not stuck there. It's a persona decision but don't feel anxious. Neither choice will leave you stuck.
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S3z
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halls is the best...
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Drez999
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I understand how difficult and complex your decision is.
Is it possible you could get a studio near the Uni? That way you will have your own space, can keep some of your furniture with you and avoid the anxiety of either having flat mates or enduring the downside of halls?
When I was in my first year halls were good for me for socialisation as I didn't know anyone but it is not for everyone.
I don't think I've been much help to you but I will say one thing with absolute certainty - if you are intending to get a pet then please NOT a dog. Cats are very much more independent and can be left alone but dogs are very much more social animals.
I hope you make the right decisions for you and wish you luck. ❤️
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