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I feel like I'm struggling with life at university Watch

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    (Original post by Frostyjoe)
    I think they just find me indifferent. I don't know what i'd have to do to seem interesting to them, maybe nothing.

    People keep telling me it's going to be different next year but I don't know. Why would it? Wouldn't people have the same desires to make friendships in a foundation year? (If they were going to ever make friends?)
    Exactly this

    My work colleague even said it indirectly the other day saying 'your flatmates see you weird because you have a drunk nature and an introvert nature' (i drank a lot during freshers which showed my fun side)

    Honest to God, it's a tragedy. I wouldn't advice anyone to study a foundation year just to be in extra debt and finding the course content suicidal.
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    Uni 95. I'm 20 right now but i'll be 21 next year and it's going to be so embaressing sitting there with 18 year olds. I've been thinking about this already and it just makes me want to give up.

    I regret taking a gap year so much, it just wasted my time.

    Don't get me wrong foundation years are REALLY good for people who don't have A Levels or any sort of qualifications but when you've got 3 B's at A Level like me it's kind of a waste of time.
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    (Original post by Frostyjoe)
    Uni 95. I'm 20 right now but i'll be 21 next year and it's going to be so embaressing sitting there with 18 year olds. I've been thinking about this already and it just makes me want to give up.

    I regret taking a gap year so much, it just wasted my time.

    Don't get me wrong foundation years are REALLY good for people who don't have A Levels or any sort of qualifications but when you've got 3 B's at A Level like me it's kind of a waste of time.
    I part agree of what your saying but in your case you would have been better off doing a HND or a foundation degree. Also i regret doing a gap year as well (a 2 year gap year of hell)

    I also read that you tell people that your a 'first year doing such and such'. What are you planning to tell people next year? that your a second year or a first year again? I have this same problem as well and i think it would be harder for me to tell people that i will be a first year again espicially as i am a student ambassador for my uni
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    (Original post by The Empire Odyssey)
    Your problem is the making friends and the lack of confidence. Uni is supposed to help you find yourself. You need confidence in this dog-eat-dog world. You need to have some sort of charisma. Some people find it early in their their childhood, others not until after uni.

    Might I suggest you try look for a part-time job? I have never really had a problem with confidence (unless I was surrounded with a group of cliques). But, when I had a job, it made me extra confident because I had to talk to randomers and face a lot of different people. This might be good for your self-esteem problem. No matter, which uni you'd go to - you will HAVE to put in the effort to make friends and maintain them. That is life. You get what you earn really. If you never made the effort to make friends during Freshers, then now - unfortunately, you are reaping those consequences.

    A therapist isn't used for people who have mental health problems - that's usually for psychiatrists. Therapists are used for lots of reasons, if someone is feeling lonely, truamtized, fear, anxiety, stress, etc. I would recommend seeing one because they can help you with your confidence and give you some tricks and tips to help you.
    I completely disagree with what you have to say about freshers week. Freshers was awful, yes it appeals to some more than others, but all it does is forms significant amounts of "fake friendships" as no-one wants to appear alone.

    I didn't really make any/many friends during freshers, and moved accommodation after a few weeks. I have made pretty much all my friends through societies and the course, and only recently in most cases. Although I am still struggling a bit, there is no cause for concern if you don't make friends during freshers.
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    (Original post by TheRaspberry)
    I completely disagree with what you have to say about freshers week. Freshers was awful, yes it appeals to some more than others, but all it does is forms significant amounts of "fake friendships" as no-one wants to appear alone.

    I didn't really make any/many friends during freshers, and moved accommodation after a few weeks. I have made pretty much all my friends through societies and the course, and only recently in most cases. Although I am still struggling a bit, there is no cause for concern if you don't make friends during freshers.
    I don't believe I said Freshers was good or bad. i simply implied it's the best way to make friends. To make many, then cap it once you form the real friendships.

    All uni experiences are different, but most have gone through what I just said.

    No need to be so defensive about it. I was being subjective. Good that you found friends.
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    (Original post by Frostyjoe)
    YES! I cringe about it aswell! Most of the time people don't ask but if they do I just lie and say i'm in first year doing 'such and such'. To me it's embaressing, as I do have A Levels (BBB), I got accepted into two degrees but I didn't want to do them.

    I kinda regret not doing them now because i'm at least a year behind my age group. I know it doesn't matter but I hate wasting my time, when they're done i'll still have two years left.

    I always feel like people assume that foundation years are for stupid people. The reason why I personally did it was because I didn't do A Levels in the right subjects, nothing to do with being stupid or failing my subjects. I'm an intelligent person and very capable of doing a degree at this stage.
    I know this is easier said than done, but I hope it helps if you stop hating yourself for your bad decisions and terrible mistakes. It really makes you unhappy and gives you the feeling that you pretty much have nothing to be proud of or satisfied with... when you probably do but you don't really realise it so much. I suppose some might disagree with me on this, but I kind of just wanted to say it anyway

    The reason why I don't really tell people that I'm on a foundation year is because of what you've said - I feel as though everyone looks down on us foundation year students because they think we flunked our A levels. The only reason why I'm on this course is because I didn't have the right A levels for the degree that I would like to do. I just want to get this year over and done with to be honest, just so that it puts us out of our misery
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    (Original post by Uyi 95)
    Exactly all this you have mentioned.

    I study in the arts department (where all people from different subjects doing an art degree like music, media, fine art etc) and nothing interest me.

    To make matters worse everybody in my course is a roadman and the people who were in my subject specialism dropped out meaning im the only one in my subject specialism stuck with other losers in their subject specialisms

    I just don't have friends either way hence why im living in a studio flat for next year. My flatmate is a first year in the subject i do in and he is an actual nerd but this term, he is now hanging out with people and has avoided me whenever we have lessons together or even in halls.

    Honest to God, i understand your issue. I seriously don't what advice i can give you. Perhaps just move antisocial and just focus on the degree. University has opened my eyes and as a 21 year old man who people have already gruduated, i feel even more embarassed to be sat with a group of immature 18 year olds.
    I feel your pain I'm 19 now and I'm going to be 20 when I start my degree with the first year students which is not as bad as being 21, but perhaps it might help if you say you are a mature student and I believe that 21 is the age which makes you one. Atleast then that way, you have a reasonable justification for whenever it might come in handy
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    Yes, I don't feel valued as a student to sum it up. Some of the students on degrees now have lower grades than me.
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    Sussex is my first choice, although I haven't firmed yet, and this is kind of worrying..
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    (Original post by fairplaytoyou)
    Sussex is my first choice, although I haven't firmed yet, and this is kind of worrying..
    Please don't be put off, problems with housemates and struggles to make friends probably happen to a lot of students in all universities. I personally think that you just have to be prepared on how to deal with such issues when they come - obviously I was never prepared because I was not expecting these issues to arise.

    If you've seen Brighton & the university campus for yourself and you felt that you like it, then fantastic - firm if you feel that you will be happy here. But if you have not seen what it is like, I would advise that you take a visit before you firm. The last thing you want to happen when you arrive here in September is that you begin to feel as though nothing seems to be meeting your expectations and this is exactly how I felt like when I first came here.
 
 
 
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