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what is peoples problem with young(ish) people having more then one kid!!! Watch

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    its not hurting you or causing you offence and it certainly doesnt effect you so why does it bother so many people!?!?

    yes im 22 (23 next month) and i have 3 kids, 2 to one guy and my baby to my new long term boyfriend. only means i have longer to love my kids as opposed to having them at a later age

    people need to stop judging others for their life choices!!!!
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    I guess it's the whole thing about the stereotype of the young parents on benefits who keep having more children. I'm 25 with one child and I don't want any more but if you can afford it, have as many as you like!
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    Because most people complain that you should only have 2 kids and only when you're 28+


    And then we end up having to import millions of immigrants because people don't have enough children.


    And then the same people complain about the immigrants.
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    I want to have kids before I reach my late 20s..
    I guess nowadays women are encouraged to put career first and family life second
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    i feel like it's instinct to complain and judge...i mean i cant help sometimes in the back of my head, i do ask ''is that a good idea?''...but then i can easily snap into reality and think to myself, does it really affect me? and then i just move on.
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    It used to be the norm (and it still is in some parts of the world) because most people didn't live beyond the age of 45. Now with most people in rich countries guaranteed at least 75 years of life, it became more acceptable to choose not to have children (or have them later in life), though I suspect the opposite is happening, where you are ridiculed for choosing to have children early
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    For me personally it would arouse suspicion as to your ability to be financially secure enough to be able to provide a good quality of life/living for your children.
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    i mean im in a stable family, we can afford it and im doing a degree to better all of our lives so its not like im so josie cunningham wana be
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    (Original post by shawtyb)
    i mean im in a stable family, we can afford it and im doing a degree to better all of our lives so its not like im so josie cunningham wana be
    I've got nothing but admiration for you.
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    Ummm, how big is the age gap between your 2nd and 3rd kid that you can call your current bf long term? Just because you can "afford" it doesn't mean they're living a decent life, not many people our age have jobs decent enough for it, so unless your bf is a sugar daddy idk how you're letting them live decently while doing a degree, but that's just me. End of the day you're a stranger on TSR so doesn't affect me either way
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    I know what you're saying! I had 2 kids by 22, I'm 25 now and I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old. I don't think I look particularly young for my age but when people find out my oldest is six they're like you have a six year old?!
    I remember when I was pregnant with my first and people, mainly elderley people, would look at me like s**t.
    I think it is a stereotype thing, young mums/no job/benefits etc.. which is ridiculous. I was working two jobs when I was having my eldest and one of those jobs was behind the bar of a very busy pub. I didn't stop working until I was 36 weeks because I didn't wanna just sit at home all day waiting for the baby!
    I have a friend who is a year younger than me, she has three kids and her eldest is 9. You should see the looks she gets! People automatically label her too. She has a great job, is a homeowner and a fantastic mum.
    It's a shame people think like this, we just have to ignore them
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    It's probably the assumption that young mother = has children by multiple men and lives off benefits.
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    (Original post by alexschmalex)
    Just because you can "afford" it doesn't mean they're living a decent life, not many people our age have jobs decent enough for it, so unless your bf is a sugar daddy idk how you're letting them live decently while doing a degree
    I agree with this.


    For me personally I would have to be on £60k+ myself (not including my gf's income) before I even considered having one child, let alone three. I think it's selfish to bring a child into this world without having the means to enable it to have a good standard of living.
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    (Original post by Supersaps)
    I've got nothing but admiration for you.
    awww

    (Original post by alexschmalex)
    Ummm, how big is the age gap between your 2nd and 3rd kid that you can call your current bf long term? Just because you can "afford" it doesn't mean they're living a decent life, not many people our age have jobs decent enough for it, so unless your bf is a sugar daddy idk how you're letting them live decently while doing a degree, but that's just me. End of the day you're a stranger on TSR so doesn't affect me either way
    4 year age gap and they have a perfectly decent life tyvm. no his not a sugar daddy, his in the military and the degree is online for convenience so they still see me all day bar school obviously.
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    (Original post by lawyer12345)
    I agree with this.


    For me personally I would have to be on £60k+ myself (not including my gf's income) before I even considered having one child, let alone three. I think it's selfish to bring a child into this world without having the means to enable it to have a good standard of living.
    I agree with what you are saying too. However, I think the issue is people automatically making the assumption that you can't possibly afford to have children because you are a young parent, when this isn't always the case.

    Between me and my husband we make enough money to live comfortably and can provide our kids with anything that they need. Even when I was pregnant I took an extra job in a pub to keep busy, I didn't need to do it because we would have been able to live off of his wage alone, but I like to keep busy!

    I completely agree that you should be financially stable to think about starting a family, but I disagree that people should assume you can't afford your kids because you are young.

    Interestingly nobody bats an eye when my husband says he has two children and I think it is because he is 30. It's crazy how much of a difference it can make between being 25 and having two kids and being 30 and having two kids.
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    (Original post by shawtyb)
    its not hurting you or causing you offence and it certainly doesnt effect you so why does it bother so many people!?!?

    yes im 22 (23 next month) and i have 3 kids, 2 to one guy and my baby to my new long term boyfriend. only means i have longer to love my kids as opposed to having them at a later age

    people need to stop judging others for their life choices!!!!
    Babe , do whatever you want <3 !
    I don't see the problem, that's your choice and you live happily (is my spelling correct ..?) like that !

    Btw my mum got my brother at 19 and me at 22 , so you're not the only one apparently haha :P

    Anyway , you're happy , that's perfect !! People who always criticize are just jealous or afraid that you follow your onw choices , and not the general choice of the society we live in

    *do not hesitate to correct me please*
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    Imagine what you could have done with your life if you did not have three children to think about. You have a lot of responsibility for such a young person.

    I think that young women should be putting their career ahead of everything else in their early 20s. You can have all the kids you want in your late 20s and 30s.

    I also question why you had a second child by the same guy at such an early stage. Your whole post reeks of insecurity if I'm going to be honest.

    Having said that I am glad your children are well cared for and that you're pursuing to further your own education. I hope it works out with the new fella'.
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    (Original post by Danny McCoyne)
    I think that young women should be putting their career ahead of everything else in their early 20s. You can have all the kids you want in your late 20s and 30s.
    They shouldn't do what they want now because they can do what they don't want to do now and do what they actually do want to do later...

    yeah?
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    (Original post by shawtyb)
    awww



    4 year age gap and they have a perfectly decent life tyvm. no his not a sugar daddy, his in the military and the degree is online for convenience so they still see me all day bar school obviously.
    Imo nobody our age, male or female, is really ready (as in maturity wise) to be responsible for a child's life yet, even at 21 I'm still realizing there's so much **** I don't know and need to get a hold of in order to survive the rest of adulthood. Not saying that to put you down or anything (I get that some people are just jerks about it for no reason) but I know a bunch of people who had kids early and as much as they love them, wish they'd waited in order to do better for them. But as long as they're taken care of if every way, that's the most important thing.
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    Each to their own but I just prefer freedom and living my life.
 
 
 
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