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What makes people happy about seeing someone else in pain? Watch

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    Not even necessarily in pain, but what causes people to feel satisfied about making someone uncomfortable? I can understand vengeance but I don't understand other things..for example a meat eater deliberately offering a vegan/vegetarian person meat..(only one I could think of lol)
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    I think some people aren't as sensitive to other people's feelings so don't even realise they have upset someone. My partner is like this, he says some really insensitive things and doesn't understand when I get upset. Other people have various senses of humour (that sounds really grammatically wrong but whatever) so find things funny other people don't.
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    ive witnessed that and i dont know how people can do it, if i see someone in pain or they are upset, even if it is my worst enemy i would feel obliged to go up to them and ask if they are okay/need anything
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    (Original post by mkap)
    ive witnessed that and i dont know how people can do it, if i see someone in pain or they are upset, even if it is my worst enemy i would feel obliged to go up to them and ask if they are okay/need anything
    This is going to sound extremely lame but when I was about 14 I had 3 girl best friends. We were just about to start the next year of high school and I went on holiday for the first 2 weeks. I came back and we suddenly had another female member of the 'group' and I'd sorta been booted out but not really. I spent weeks being involved in the group but not quite in it. One day this new girl (call her Becky) went to get some food while we were in the loos and I said some really horrible things about her. Turns out she was stood listening at the door and ran away in tears. I felt HORRENDOUS to the point where I spent about a months pocket money buying her a shed load of chocolate, a card and some flowers etc. because I felt so guilty.

    I think that is the last time I intentionally hurt someone's feelings, I have never felt so evil in my life as then.
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    (Original post by Tw1x)
    This is going to sound extremely lame but when I was about 14 I had 3 girl best friends. We were just about to start the next year of high school and I went on holiday for the first 2 weeks. I came back and we suddenly had another female member of the 'group' and I'd sorta been booted out but not really. I spent weeks being involved in the group but not quite in it. One day this new girl (call her Becky) went to get some food while we were in the loos and I said some really horrible things about her. Turns out she was stood listening at the door and ran away in tears. I felt HORRENDOUS to the point where I spent about a months pocket money buying her a shed load of chocolate, a card and some flowers etc. because I felt so guilty.

    I think that is the last time I intentionally hurt someone's feelings, I have never felt so evil in my life as then.
    its not lame, it shows your not a b**** and you have a heart
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    (Original post by mkap)
    its not lame, it shows your not a b**** and you have a heart
    Aha thanks I think it was that incident which made me realise how horrible it is to be two faced and intentionally nasty. Now I'm like the biggest soft touch ever and wouldn't be caught dead saying something like that because the guilt killed me. I just don't have it in me to deliberately hurt somebody else's feelings
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    It doesn't make me feel good, it makes me feel awful. The only exception is mild embarrassment which I find it quite adorable to watch - but that's different as it's only a short term thing and isn't reflective of any deep pain.
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    I don't understand it either. Even pointing out someone's flaws or insecurities for no apparent reason. It isn't necessary, just spiteful. I strongly dislike people who turn people's insecurities into a joke for comedy.

    I see a lot of youtubers who do this and I really don't like it at all. What's worse is when other people find it funny and egg it on.
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    (Original post by Tw1x)
    This is going to sound extremely lame but when I was about 14 I had 3 girl best friends. We were just about to start the next year of high school and I went on holiday for the first 2 weeks. I came back and we suddenly had another female member of the 'group' and I'd sorta been booted out but not really. I spent weeks being involved in the group but not quite in it. One day this new girl (call her Becky) went to get some food while we were in the loos and I said some really horrible things about her. Turns out she was stood listening at the door and ran away in tears. I felt HORRENDOUS to the point where I spent about a months pocket money buying her a shed load of chocolate, a card and some flowers etc. because I felt so guilty.

    I think that is the last time I intentionally hurt someone's feelings, I have never felt so evil in my life as then.
    At least you genuinely apologised, some people legit wouldn't care.
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    (Original post by AthiaKarim)
    I don't understand it either. Even pointing out someone's flaws or insecurities for no apparent reason. It isn't necessary, just spiteful. I strongly dislike people who turn people's insecurities into a joke for comedy.

    I see a lot of youtubers who do this and I really don't like it at all. What's worse is when other people find it funny and egg it on.
    Exactly
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    (Original post by jessicasulty)
    At least you genuinely apologised, some people legit wouldn't care.
    Yeah, I must genuinely feel guilty, this was about 10 years ago lol, maybe more and I still feel bad
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    I think this is possible even in the most kind hearted people, everyone has a potentiality for corruption, even if they don't realise it.
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    I think it makes people feel better about themselves.
    It's a bit like Jeremy Kyle, people watch it because it makes them feel better about their own lives.
    Selfish and sad, but true!
    It's a man eat man world out there.


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    (Original post by mkap)
    ive witnessed that and i dont know how people can do it, if i see someone in pain or they are upset, even if it is my worst enemy i would feel obliged to go up to them and ask if they are okay/need anything
    That doesn't mean the person is gaining satisfaction from not going up to them and seeing that someone is pain. If it's in public things like the Bystander Effect are important to consider in the situation you're describing.
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    (Original post by Emily.97)
    That doesn't mean the person is gaining satisfaction from not going up to them and seeing that someone is pain. If it's in public things like the Bystander Effect are important to consider in the situation you're describing.
    i know but once i was in a situation where i was at an all time low, i had done somthing stupid and everyone found out and the girl who has bullied me all my life knew how stressful it was for me as i was crying all the time about it and she still decided to bully me about it and encourage her friends to do so too. if i was in her situation i would have sympathised to her and asked if she way okay.

    i didnt make it clear that i was referring to this but she got pleasure out of seeing me in a bad place.
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    (Original post by mkap)
    i know but once i was in a situation where i was at an all time low, i had done somthing stupid and everyone found out and the girl who has bullied me all my life knew how stressful it was for me as i was crying all the time about it and she still decided to bully me about it and encourage her friends to do so too. if i was in her situation i would have sympathised to her and asked if she way okay.

    i didnt make it clear that i was referring to this but she got pleasure out of seeing me in a bad place.
    Ah, okay.
    It is interesting, understanding why people gain satisfaction from these kind of things. There are many influences..age, maturity, values taught by parents, social influences, arguably personality traits. It might be that the girl who bullies you values social status and popularity more than treating others in a decent way. It might be something she learns from in the future which is why im reluctant to say its because of her personality or because she's naturally a bad person.
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    (Original post by AthiaKarim)
    I don't understand it either. Even pointing out someone's flaws or insecurities for no apparent reason. It isn't necessary, just spiteful. I strongly dislike people who turn people's insecurities into a joke for comedy.

    I see a lot of youtubers who do this and I really don't like it at all. What's worse is when other people find it funny and egg it on.
    so true, will rep
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    (Original post by jessicasulty)
    Not even necessarily in pain, but what causes people to feel satisfied about making someone uncomfortable? I can understand vengeance but I don't understand other things..for example a meat eater deliberately offering a vegan/vegetarian person meat..(only one I could think of lol)
    If I hated someone then obviously I would like it but someone random, not really
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    (Original post by MJlover)
    so true, will rep
    Thank you. Glad people feel the same
 
 
 
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