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I think my mother favours my brothers girlfriend more than mine watch

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    #1

    It sounds pretty petty of me and irrelevant what other people might think about my partner. However, I just feel like my mother thinks a lot more highly of my brothers girlfriend for a number of reasons:

    Generally, me and my girlfriend have had an on/off relationship- and I've expressed my own disdain at times. Although I've made up, and mum knows how much I love her.

    I help my girlfriend out financially from time to time, but that had to stop due to it not been sustainable.

    Also, my mother has made off-the-cuff remarks about my girlfriends weight (she's overweight) to me- after having made a comment about me, saying I such really start looking after my body- then collectively mentioned 'us'.

    Whereas, my brothers girlfriend is the very sophisticated- middle class type and very thin, hourglass figure. She is very talented. I mean unbelievably good at many things. She is musical, academically gifted, an A* student, good at baking, even good at cutting my brothers hair. She is going off to some prestigious University on a scholarship (inevitably).

    Me and my girlfriend graduated recently, both in the arts. She in performance and theatre and me in design. My mum has also made off-cuff comments about how she feels my partners degree 'isn't worth much cop for anything'.

    What can I do about this? It really upsets me, and while I'm a wee bit jealous about the unfairness of it, my mum seems to favour them over 'us' she isn't very balanced.
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    To be perfectly honest, you can't make your mother like your girlfriend, it just isn't going to happen. The best you can do is get them to spend time together and hope that they click? Or else just tell your mother that you love your girlfriend and her constantly putting her down is annoying you and making you unhappy. Maybe mentioning that if she loved you she woudl support you no matter what?
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    You could say openly that her comments hurt your feelings and that your partner has many positive qualities too but you can't make her like your girlfriend.
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    To be honest I'd say a lot of this would be down to the 'on-off' nature of your relationship. It makes the whole relationship seem pretty unstable and if, when you're broken up, you vent and say anything negative about your girlfriend your mothers not going to just forget about it all when you get back together.
    Although the comments about her weight and education are pretty out of order and its probably worth having a word with her about how they make you feel.
 
 
 
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