i told a lie now i feel bad

i just recently broke up with my boyfriend and my closest male mate took me out for a few drinks to celebrate/cheer me up whatever anyway my two other mates were ment to come,
they turned up two hours late but i was already having a great time with my male mate, thats all i thought it was two mates having some drinks and a laugh. at the end of the night he walked me home (fair enough he always walked me home) we had a bit of a gossip and i was well tired so i wanted to go to bed, i said bye and he gave me a hug, he started shoving his tongue down my throat and groping me i had to push him off me.

i don't know where he got that idea from but he thought he was going to get lucky with me, so the next week he invitesme out and we cleared the air even joked about it. It sounded like the doing of a mate of mine who is abit of a cow and likes to stir it up. So i told her i had already met someone else the week before this all happened. I made it up so he would back off,

now i realise that when i was supposedly ment to meet this other guy i was still with my ex, i feel awful ive lied i can't tell her coz she will go off on one,

im somoene who doesn't lie and i felt i had to as my friendships were going to be ruined do i come clean??? or just forget i even mentioned it and move on????

sorry if it makes no sense

xx

Reply 1

louisedotcom

I understand what you mean in a way but does it really matter?

In my opinion it sounds like your other male friend was taking advantage of the fact that you had just come out of a realtionship and were vunerable- so I think you had every right to say something, even a white lie to get him to back off a bit.

I dont know why your girl friend would be annoyed though cant you just tell her that you only said it because you wanted him to back off and it slipped out, im sure if she was that much of a friend she would understand. You dont have to mention the fact that you only told her because she likes to stir things up.

Reply 2

joz12345

it doesnt really matter now your friends shouldnt be annoyed ur x may be annoyed as if he heard then hel think u cheated but he shouldnt really care anyways now

Reply 3

Laursy

thats why im worried also coz my ex will think i cheated but thats not the most important thing after my mate tried it on a felt so cheap and i had a fantastic night and it all just got ruined, i thought how dare he treat me like a cheap little slapper whose obviously easy coz im now single, i may have acted like a slapper in the past but never again!!

my gal mate acted like so was so angry with him for being out of order but the look in her eye said there was more to it!!

me and my male mate went out again last week and we cleared it all up agreed to be mates then started going on about seeing us being together and having loads of fun, it made me feel sick. he kept leaving me to flirt with gals and be a general loser so i just walked out and went home,

why must people think im easy just coz im not in a relationship anymore, the last thing i want is to get involved with another loser it made me so angry!!

i thought i was naive for not seeing how that evening would go im so stupid lol i worry about everything lol

Reply 4

Malik24

I think you need to be honest with yourself and them.

I think your friends were wrong to take advantage of you in this time and you should talk to them about it. Also, when it comes to relationships and "pulling", then no means no, stand your ground.

If your ex asks about it explain to him why you did it and I expect he will be okay with it and even sympathetic. You don't deserve to be abused like that.

As the above poster says: try not to dwell on it and move on, you've really done nothing wrong here.

Reply 5

Laursy

Your friend sounds pretty useless by the way. The fact that you felt as though you need to lie to her speaks volumes about your friendship, there is probably some hostility there and it sounds like you just don't need her in your life. Especially at such a delecate time.

thanks you everyone has been saying the same but i never thought i deserved better, she makes me feel so small she is always saying how stupid i am and how shes better if i have a problem hers is bigger, i was there for her when her mum died and she lost her job (for stealing) i stuck by her through break ups and fallings outs, she went out with my brother one of the most important people in my life, got pregnant and got rid of the baby (my flesh and blood) i was there for her!!!

now she has a new boyf she doens't want to know ive never felt so used and i don't really trust people enough now to build new friendships,

i sound like a victim but i know i should have got rid long ago, my ex will never believe her over me, should i warn him??? not that he cares he was useless as well lol!! he was always telling me to grow a back bone and stand up for myself don't be a doormatt!!!

dunno what to do now lol!!! be on my own or stay mates with losers lol

Reply 6

Schroedinger's Pandora

How can you shine as a person with these totally useless people around you? It sounds as though you are investing your youth into people who appear to be willing to drop you at their earliest convenience, and that's just such an awful way to spend your life. On the other hand I know how it is to be used by "friends" and just totally be intimidated by them.. I can only assure you that as you get older, these people tend to stick together whilst the rest of us move up in the world. It won't be like this forever, and I think that "growing a backbone and standing up for yourself", is probably the best move you can make right now. People will certainly begin to respect you and that can make an awfully big difference to your circle of friends.

Easier said than done, but honey, don't be anybody's doormat! :wink: