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Original post by Plantagenet Crown
Ignore their racist, negative crap. If he is who you love then religion shouldn't get in the way of that.


If she is truly devoted to her religion, then she will not sacrifice it for a relationship. If the man on the other end was very committed to being in a relationship with her, he will convert.
Original post by lulucoco98
How do you know it will lead to unhappiness, have you tried and tested it? It's her decision, she's allowed to make her own choices, she's over 18 and no longer needs to abide by her parents rules, she's allowed to do as she pleases. You state 'Later down the line if this relationship doesnt work out then what does she have no family no parents all because of some person she was in "love"' I don't think I would want to be associated with such parents who threaten to disown me and what not, a parent should love their child regardless, and her parents clearly do not and prioritise other things before their daughters happiness which I believe is completely unacceptable.


And don't say 'no this isn't some fairy tale' to try and belittle my opinion.
Right because you clearly can't analyse she's wrote it in a manner that portrays her family in a negative light she brings her sister into it even tho she hasn't done anything to her directly. Many marriages end in divorce in today's world this is just a fact. Why she would want to throw her parents respect and have nothing to do with them is beyond me. Yes you said yourself she's 18 shes an adult. People have little value to parents now what about the 18 years her parents spent looking after her giving her food shelter sleepless nights personal sacrifices they've made. And now because she's in "love" her parents are unreasonable and strict...

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Original post by Anonymous
If she is truly devoted to her religion, then she will not sacrifice it for a relationship. If the man on the other end was very committed to being in a relationship with her, he will convert.


That's not true.


You follow a religion because you believe in it, if he can't believe in Islam, it does not mean he loves OP any less.
Convert him to islam maybe??? A friend of mine who is white became interested in islam back in school and then started going mosque (he was the only white guy there) plus i see him at jummah every week he's cool. mashallah
(edited 8 years ago)
You shouldn't have allowed yourself to fall deeply in love with him that you can't see yourself being with anyone else especially since you come from a strict culture. It's hard but in your culture family is a big thing and are you prepared to take the risk of losing them forever if you ran away with this chap? What if it didn't work out with him in the end? Who will be there for you? I would suggest slowly detach yourself from him and think logically, as love can be blind. He needs to understand your culture and he needs to be vigilant because some families are harmful if things go out of hand. It's a lot better for you and when you have children in the future to look for an open minded Muslim who is liberal than a non Muslim or a Muslim with a backward upbringing. At the end of the day you are living under your parents roof so respect their wishes until you become independent and then you can take control of your decisions and life.
Original post by CAPTAINSHAZAM
Right because you clearly can't analyse she's wrote it in a manner that portrays her family in a negative light she brings her sister into it even tho she hasn't done anything to her directly. Many marriages end in divorce in today's world this is just a fact. Why she would want to throw her parents respect and have nothing to do with them is beyond me. Yes you said yourself she's 18 shes an adult. People have little value to parents now what about the 18 years her parents spent looking after her giving her food shelter sleepless nights personal sacrifices they've made. And now because she's in "love" her parents are unreasonable and strict...

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Like her father who remarried, even though he is already married and who she said messes around anyway, and you're sitting here telling me that Islam is more righteous than OP's boyfriend?
Original post by Anonymous
If she is truly devoted to her religion, then she will not sacrifice it for a relationship. If the man on the other end was very committed to being in a relationship with her, he will convert.


Let me get this straight. If someone loves you they should change their entire lifestyle and personality to appease your conservative, hateful, bigoted parents and will subscribe to your violent, hateful, bigoted, sexist religion that is responsible for such activities as throwing people off buildings and thinking apostates should be executed?
Such a bad life u have. Good luck.
To put context on my post, I'm an atheist with a lot of dislike towards Islam, not Muslim people as a whole (Not everyone adopts the entire religion), but the religion itself, what it represents and it's values.

You have to make a decision, your religion or your freedom. This kind of control your family has over you won't lead to a healthy life. Even if it doesn't work out with this man, you're free to see anyone you want Muslim or otherwise.

So many anon Muslims saying that you'll disgrace the faith, your family, whatever, they're a disgrace to the human race.

Unless of course your family are some of these freaky extremists you see on the news and they're likely to chop up you and your boyfriend, in which case I'd ditch your guy now if you value your life.
Original post by samina_ay
Such a bad life u have. Good luck.


Her preachy ass father is marrying again in Pakistan even though he is already married and she is the sinful one?


It's load of hypocritical ********, I cannot wait for the day, there are no races because everyone is mixed race and where there is no Christianity or Islam because everyone has seen it for the caustic nonsense it truly is.
You're 24 and you have a boyfriend with a good career. Your family could disown you (it would be a blessing more than a bad thing tbh) but then at least you would have your bf to fall back on. Speak to your boyfriend and ask if you can live with him. If he says yes, then ask your family if they still have any objections. If they do, walk out.

And as for the Muslims who are telling you it's haraam and all that, do you really think any decent God or parent would want you to be miserable? You can't help who you fall for. As long as you're happy and you're not hurting anyone that is really all that matters.

So yeah OP, walk out.

I hope everything works out well!x
Original post by SemperLiber
To put context on my post, I'm an atheist with a lot of dislike towards Islam, not Muslim people as a whole (Not everyone adopts the entire religion), but the religion itself, what it represents and it's values.

You have to make a decision, your religion or your freedom. This kind of control your family has over you won't lead to a healthy life. Even if it doesn't work out with this man, you're free to see anyone you want Muslim or otherwise.

So many anon Muslims saying that you'll disgrace the faith, your family, whatever, they're a disgrace to the human race.

Unless of course your family are some of these freaky extremists you see on the news and they're likely to chop up you and your boyfriend, in which case I'd ditch your guy now if you value your life.


Don't confuse Islam with Pakistani culture please. People do all sorts of bad things in the name of religion and they are the worst kind.
"There is no compulsion in religion" !!! oh wait... I guess we know which side the "compulsion" lies... tell your mum she is being "unmuslamic" and she will be condemned to an eternity of hell-fire if she doesn't understand the "true interpretation of Islam". Remember this is nothing to do with Islam - foreign policy is at fault.

Anyway on a serious note, this has been mentioned before but your mother seriously wants the best for you, and she is doing this with the best of intentions. Even your mum knows this is your life (I doubt she is as much of a control freak as people are saying) and doesn't want you to regret it. Best way I guess is to have a long chat (with your mum and bf together) to see what her worries are...
no offense but you knew from the very beginning that you could not marry a non-muslim, so why did you put yourself in a position where you could have fallen in love with him ....

why did you spend that much time etc that you managed to fall in love with him, it takes a certain getting to know someone for that to happen ...
Original post by Anonymous
If she is truly devoted to her religion, then she will not sacrifice it for a relationship. If the man on the other end was very committed to being in a relationship with her, he will convert.


You want her to dump someone who loves and respects her for her parents who don't give a damn about she wants and want to push their own agenda for the sake of their misogynistic culture instead? If the guy doesn't want to convert, he doesn't have to. Why do you think religion have to be the thing that will bind them together?

Only can say 2 things to what you said.

1) I am so so glad (and I pray to God everyday for this) that I wasn't born a Muslim.

2) It's the 21st century sweetheart. OP can do whatever the hell she wants, even if it involves leaving home. She doesn't need a book to tell her what to do.
Original post by MrsSheldonCooper
You're 24 and you have a boyfriend with a good career. Your family could disown you (it would be a blessing more than a bad thing tbh) but then at least you would have your bf to fall back on. Speak to your boyfriend and ask if you can live with him. If he says yes, then ask your family if they still have any objections. If they do, walk out.

And as for the Muslims who are telling you it's haraam and all that, do you really think any decent God or parent would want you to be miserable? You can't help who you fall for. As long as you're happy and you're not hurting anyone that is really all that matters.

So yeah OP, walk out.

I hope everything works out well!x


That awkward moment where the rules Allah created, are suspiciously similar to the rules an insecure old man would have created.


It's almost as if it's not true
Original post by RosyPearl
Don't confuse Islam with Pakistani culture please. People do all sorts of bad things in the name of religion and they are the worst kind.


Pakistani culture is more or less a byproduct of Islam, it just depends how a person or group interprets the Quran.

I'm not saying all Muslims behead people, the same way not every Christian participates in holy crusades.
Original post by Anonymous
no offense but you knew from the very beginning that you could not marry a non-muslim, so why did you put yourself in a position where you could have fallen in love with him ....

why did you spend that much time etc that you managed to fall in love with him, it takes a certain getting to know someone for that to happen ...


its very hard to choose who you fall in love with don't you think - the alternative is that don't spend any time with anyone in the opposite gender (or same gender if you lean like that)
Original post by 4 al-Quds dayz
Like her father who remarried, even though he is already married and who she said messes around anyway, and you're sitting here telling me that Islam is more righteous than OP's boyfriend?


That's not Islam though is it ? The messing around part

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