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Texting a lot vs. less electronic contact Watch

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    So my last relationship got me thinking. It was an incredibly intense connection full of deep emotional discussion about personal issues etc. but little in the way of perhaps more superficial chat/humour. We barely messaged one another when apart but saw each other numerous times a week if not more so. My gf wanted to message more, but I am not a keen texter as I'd rather connect in person. Once we got to university, this relationship broke down and I wonder whether it might not have done had we had a more open line of electronic communication.

    Friends of mine message their gfs all the time, for several hours every day through FB messenger. However, many of these relationships don't seem to involve discussion of deep emotional issues/problems, rather are based on fun and perhaps more superficial chat. I know for a fact that my ex does this with her new guy, so clearly she wanted to, although I did not provide this.

    My question is this: does this kind of electronic connection help to sustain a relationship over time/distance? Is a relationship involving a great deal of electronic messaging more likely to survive the test of time, even if it does not involve such depth of discussion, even in person? Or do you think that this kind of messaging would lead to a greater level of emotional depth in person, just over a period of time?

    Thanks all.
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    I'm not sure my long distance relationship would survive if it weren't for regular Skype sessions.

    Often though we find ourselves chatting about "deeper" stuff on FaceBook, then on Skype we just chat and relax and have a laugh.
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    I would say it helps a lot, I mean, before electronic communication you would have to use pen and paper write to your partner so I don't see any difference using text/fb/whatsapp apart from that it's instant. You can even send voice notes if you wanted to make it more personal.

    Relationships nowadays can rely quite heavily on technology. I say, get with the times man
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    (Original post by C_tinie_D)
    I would say it helps a lot, I mean, before electronic communication you would have to use pen and paper write to your partner so I don't see any difference using text/fb/whatsapp apart from that it's instant. You can even send voice notes if you wanted to make it more personal.

    Relationships nowadays can rely quite heavily on technology. I say, get with the times man
    Agreed, but ignoring long distance, when you see someone on a regular basis, does the addition of messaging bring couples closer do you think?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Agreed, but ignoring long distance, when you see someone on a regular basis, does the addition of messaging bring couples closer do you think?
    I think it just allows us to connect on a different level, I wouldn't say it does any harm.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    My question is this: does this kind of electronic connection help to sustain a relationship over time/distance? Is a relationship involving a great deal of electronic messaging more likely to survive the test of time, even if it does not involve such depth of discussion, even in person? Or do you think that this kind of messaging would lead to a greater level of emotional depth in person, just over a period of time?

    Thanks all.
    Electronic connection is definitely not all that is needed in a relationship but it provides other things e.g. being available to chat to your partner gives a sense of security, being interested in "mundane" chit chat makes you have a friendship and connect on a friendly, less intense manner and allows you to know that person a bit better in a simpler way such as what their favourite flavour crisps are.

    I believe you can (and should) have discussions with your partner i.e. not all discussions will be "wuup2, I'm watching TV, lol" . It's interesting to debate and understand that person on another level, I wouldn't say it's more emotional or not, I'd just say it's another , one of many levels you can connect with someone. But it's not the basis of your relationship

    People also find different things attractive. A guy I used to talk to enjoyed his "in depth conversations" ..and honestly, my heart dropped every time I looked at whatsapp and I see an essay message about something which really didn't matter to me. I replied politely but in reality I'd have preferred a chit chat, banter and crack a few jokes rather than deep conversation. He even did this when I met up with him, and considering I spent all day at work ,and just wanted to go out and enjoy his company, it was really quite draining to spend another 2 hours of my day "thinking" and being engrossed in deep conversation.
 
 
 
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