Is this bad

I broke u with my boyfriend yesterday/today and i've just had really nice night out, (am a leetle bit drunk). Is it bad to not be upset, i did cry quite a bit earlier but now it seems like i couldn't care less. i'm not sad or rather i maybe sad in my subconcious, but not right now.

Reply 1

dh00001

16

well its possible for you not to be. depends on the terms of the breakup really. i would guess that itll hit you more later on. but i hope you stay happy :smile:

Reply 2

tetrahydrocannabinol.

10

You'll feel happiness and sadness, those amazing moments right after a break-up when you feel fine are wicked, and although they may falter a bit before they stay for good, enjoy them whilst you can. Well done for being strong enough to go out and have a wicked time!

Reply 3

Jono310

8

Obviously it depends on the relationship you had. And also the way he took when you broke up with him.

My girlfriend broke up with me at Easter, somewhat out of the blue, and i totally loved her, despite that, and despite being an incredibly emotion person, i didnt have a full on cry as i expected i would, but bit by bit things started to change, my reactions to things, and the way i behaved changed, i found myself becoming quite angry and self-destructive.

thankfully thats over now and i'm ok, though will see how things go when i go home for the summer (i'm at uni, she's at home).

My advice would be just be wary of yourself and of acting differently, a break up is always hard, much more so if you have had a very close or intense relationship, and you may find the hurt coming out in different ways.

Know yourself and how you should be acting and you wont go wrong though.

Jx

Reply 4

Miss. B

10

Whenever I go out and drink too much and (even when I don't drink too much!) I wake up the next day and instantly regret nearly everything I had done so wait till 2moro and then you'll feel bad, guilty and will prob do a load of crying

Reply 5

username47781

20

It's very normal to feel like this, in time you will feel much better and wonder why you was with him.

Reply 6

ßlαcksωαn

17

Is it bad that you can't feel your heart that's been torn in two?
not at all...

Reply 7

Tufts

17

Good on yah. I usually find breakups very difficult and upsetting. Id give anything for your attitude.

Reply 8

Student_Bum

1

The fact that you're worrying why you haven't reacted yet shows you care deeply. It will hit you at some point and you'll need to have a good cry. You haven't started to heal yet.

Reply 9

hippieglitter

OP

19

I'm worried cos i've never had a proper break up. All my past break ups were mutual decision or just fizzled out but this one was kinda messy and dramatic. From watching other peoples break ups i feel i should be upset and crying for hours but at the moment i'm not and can't work out why. I can't force myself to cry.

Reply 10

hannah_dru

2

Student_Bum

The fact that you're worrying why you haven't reacted yet shows you care deeply. It will hit you at some point and you'll need to have a good cry. You haven't started to heal yet.

Yup I agree. That's what's been happening to me. I had a whole week where I just couldn't care less and was glad to be well shot of him. Now I feel bad.

Reply 11

BexiePixie

Its not bad not to be upset at all! It jus means it was the right thing to do! Going out & getting blitzed & havin a dance is a healthy way of dealing wiv it! You can't force yourself to get upset tho id imagine you'll probs end up bein a bit :s-smilie:

at some points, maybe when you're least expecting it, a little pang of missing him. But as i say, if ur not completely distraught...its a good thing! & it means it was the right thing to do for you! xox

Reply 12

Louise88

When I broke up with my last boyfriend, I didn't feel any sadness. The time had come to go our seperate ways, it was never going to work. I was moving on to something new, something exciting so why should I have felt sadness? We had a great time, for the most part, but the time came where we just had to move on. To me, it was a sense of relief and it didn't upset me in the slightest. People take break up's differently, for example my ex insulted me constantly, he harassed me for months. Look at the difference between us both, we came from the same relationship.

It's possible that it was just time for you to move on, you don't have to be sad that you are moving on because you'll experience lots of new, exiting, different things. Maybe it was just such a relief that it feels like it's a weight off your shoulders? Nothing wrong with that.

It's possible that you'll feel sadness when the break up finally hits you. Despite it happening, sometimes things don't really register for a little while and when it does, you'll feel the way you think you should be feeling. There is no way that you should be feeling, it's different for everyone so if you don't feel upset, you don't feel upset. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, you'll deal with it in your own way.

Feeling the way you do, it seems like you did the right thing. Don't feel bad about doing the right thing, be glad you did it and move on.

Reply 13

hippieglitter

OP

19

Now he keeps sendingme nasty texts, trying to make me feel like **** as if i don't feel like **** already.

Reply 14

Louise88

Keep in mind that despite what he says, he will still really care about you. He might be saying horrible things to you just now trying to make you feel guilty about ending the relationship, but if you hadn't ended it then he would never treat you in such a way. It's the hurt that's talking, try not to take it too personally.

Ignore his attempts to contact you, he is looking for a fight and every time you reply you are giving him exactly what he wants. Let him cool off, let him come to terms with what has happened and eventually he'll calm down.

Is this bad

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