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terrified to drive after being messed about Watch

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    ive been on and off driving for 2 years, (im a 19 year old female), and ive had two main experiences

    the first one was with Elite Driving and my teach basically was a perv and ripped me off hundreds - id had 16 hours with him and id never gone out of second gear let along reversing or manoeuvres so i stopped having lessons with him, passed my theory and decided to give up for a few months because i was in the middle of my a levels

    so in the summer between college and moving to uni i completed a week long intensive course with an independent driving instructor. he led me to believe i was this amazing driver and i was perfect at every manoeuvre and it was impossible for me to fail because 'the test isn't even that bad or important'..he was also a bit of a perv too

    my dad bought the intensive course for me as a surprise even though id already told him i didnt want anything to do with driving until after uni.

    i was stopped 4 minutes into doing the test after failing the two questions about the car before i got in (i wasnt told this was even part of the test and had no idea how to control the lights etc)

    the test man told me i was far too nervous on the roads and i had told my instructor that i didnt feel ready but he and my dad made me do the test anyway.

    long story short, im now in uni and literally everyone else can drive but me and its starting to get me down, i have no issue with the theory but im just too much of a nervous driver - can this be resolved??
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    (Original post by Justmoll28)
    ive been on and off driving for 2 years, (im a 19 year old female), and ive had two main experiences

    the first one was with Elite Driving and my teach basically was a perv and ripped me off hundreds - id had 16 hours with him and id never gone out of second gear let along reversing or manoeuvres so i stopped having lessons with him, passed my theory and decided to give up for a few months because i was in the middle of my a levels

    so in the summer between college and moving to uni i completed a week long intensive course with an independent driving instructor. he led me to believe i was this amazing driver and i was perfect at every manoeuvre and it was impossible for me to fail because 'the test isn't even that bad or important'

    i was stopped 4 minutes into doing the test after failing the two questions about the car before i got in (i wasnt told this was even part of the test and had no idea how to control the lights etc)

    the test man told me i was far too nervous on the roads and i had told my instructor that i didnt feel ready but he and my dad made me do the test anyway.

    long story short, im now in uni and literally everyone else can drive but me and its starting to get me down, i have no issue with the theory but im just too much of a nervous driver - can this be resolved??
    I'm sorry you went through this ordeal in the first place, that sucks. My driving instructor always tells me (I'm very nervous on the roads too, sometimes I'll flat out refuse to do something because it terrifies me so much :rofl:) that the only way to get more confident on the road is to pick yourself up and get on with it. If you make a mistake, it's OK — you're learning! You're bound to make mistakes. The only way to quell your nerves is to find an instructor and get back into it ASAP. Maybe look for another intensive course? Be sure to do your research, there's a lot of cowboys around when it comes to driving instructors. What I find the most helpful is to have a really down to earth driving instructor. If you do something wrong, they need to tell you in no uncertain terms that you did it wrong. Try and look for someone like that, firm but fair. I hope this helps :yep: and best of luck!
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    From a personal experience, if you keep focusing in the end result, in your case, trying to pass and keeping your mind on being the only one that can't drive, will prevent you from passing. This will get added pressure. Just believe that you can pass and focus on the actual practical and I'm sure that you will pass. Your bad experience with the first driving teacher may also keep you from learning properly with your new teacher as you may try to relate him with your old driving teacher. Just believe in yourself.
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    (Original post by iEthan)
    I'm sorry you went through this ordeal in the first place, that sucks. My driving instructor always tells me (I'm very nervous on the roads too, sometimes I'll flat out refuse to do something because it terrifies me so much :rofl:) that the only way to get more confident on the road is to pick yourself up and get on with it. If you make a mistake, it's OK — you're learning! You're bound to make mistakes. The only way to quell your nerves is to find an instructor and get back into it ASAP. Maybe look for another intensive course? Be sure to do your research, there's a lot of cowboys around when it comes to driving instructors. What I find the most helpful is to have a really down to earth driving instructor. If you do something wrong, they need to tell you in no uncertain terms that you did it wrong. Try and look for someone like that, firm but fair. I hope this helps :yep: and best of luck!
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    I think you're nervous due to your experiences. I think its normal for some people to have over 35 hours worth of lessons so you were wrongly told to book your test after a week even if it was an intensive course. Also, regardless of what your instructor thinks, if you don't feel comfortable/ready don't book to do your test in future. I think you should start lessons again, this time ask your friends/family for reccomendations of good instructors rather than searching for particular driving schools. Before you begin driving in a test there's always a show me/tell me part. I had to open my bonnet and show them where the oil thing was, your instructor should always spend time going over where everything is. When it got closer to my test my instructor would always spend 10 minutes per lesson testing me - that really helped. Also for future reference make sure you're taught the emergency stop too as you may be asked to do that in ur test. Don't give up, your nerves will go away when you find a decent instructor who's patient and actually teaches you correctly.
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    does anyone have any recommendations of good driving schools? i want to start again but not get ripped off for the third damn time!
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    (Original post by iEthan)
    I'm sorry you went through this ordeal in the first place, that sucks. My driving instructor always tells me (I'm very nervous on the roads too, sometimes I'll flat out refuse to do something because it terrifies me so much :rofl:) that the only way to get more confident on the road is to pick yourself up and get on with it. If you make a mistake, it's OK — you're learning! You're bound to make mistakes. The only way to quell your nerves is to find an instructor and get back into it ASAP. Maybe look for another intensive course? Be sure to do your research, there's a lot of cowboys around when it comes to driving instructors. What I find the most helpful is to have a really down to earth driving instructor. If you do something wrong, they need to tell you in no uncertain terms that you did it wrong. Try and look for someone like that, firm but fair. I hope this helps :yep: and best of luck!
    i didnt even want to do the intensive course, i know that makes me sound spoilt but i didnt ask for it and was demanded to do it and pass..i learned all the manoeuvres in 4 hours and was expected to pass with just that much practise..i want a female driver because i can deal with *****es but not pervy old men!!
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    (Original post by Justmoll28)
    i didnt even want to do the intensive course, i know that makes me sound spoilt but i didnt ask for it and was demanded to do it and pass..i learned all the manoeuvres in 4 hours and was expected to pass with just that much practise..i want a female driver because i can deal with *****es but not pervy old men!!
    Well perhaps look for (female) instructors in your local area then?
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    Best thing I'd recommend is, if you can, drive with your mum or dad while you're taking lessons. Feeling like you're the only one in control of the car (no instructor controls to fall back on) really makes you concentrate on your driving.

    You can definitely build your confidence up, it just takes practice! After you've passed (which you will), make a point of going on the routes that make you most nervous - massive roundabouts, motorways, whatever it is. When I used to drive to work, I'd park in a bay, so I became so out of practice with parallel parking that it'd give me a panic attack if I tried and failed. I made myself go to places where there were no bays to park, so I got the hang of it again. Didn't care how much traffic I held up as I got used to parking - as long as you're always aware of your surroundings, and not going to cause an accident. Don't let other road users make you nervous about being a learner!
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    (Original post by iEthan)
    Well perhaps look for (female) instructors in your local area then?
    i think I'm going to, i just want to get my license and shove it in my purse and never use it or look at it again!!
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    (Original post by Chocomento)
    Best thing I'd recommend is, if you can, drive with your mum or dad while you're taking lessons. Feeling like you're the only one in control of the car (no instructor controls to fall back on) really makes you concentrate on your driving.

    You can definitely build your confidence up, it just takes practice! After you've passed (which you will), make a point of going on the routes that make you most nervous - massive roundabouts, motorways, whatever it is. When I used to drive to work, I'd park in a bay, so I became so out of practice with parallel parking that it'd give me a panic attack if I tried and failed. I made myself go to places where there were no bays to park, so I got the hang of it again. Didn't care how much traffic I held up as I got used to parking - as long as you're always aware of your surroundings, and not going to cause an accident. Don't let other road users make you nervous about being a learner!
    thank you for the advice! i did practise with my dad when i had the first instructor and he would shout at me in the car for not knowing how to do things and then with the second instructor i was doing 4 hours of driving a day and i didnt want to touch a steering wheel after that torture haha! i really need to get it out of the way now though, its beyond a joke haha
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    (Original post by Danny McCoyne)
    Maybe if you wore less eyeliner the instructor could take you seriously.
    go away.
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    Man when i passed and went out by myself i was a wreck, now though barely anything fazes me i just get on with driving. I failed my first test for something stupid and i think its because she thought i was a nervous driver, which usually i wasnt the test just got to me
    best thing to do is to just get loads of experience on the roads
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    I'm really surprised by so many bad experiences. It's a good idea to have a one of assessment lesson with a couple of instructors to find out who you are most comfortable with. Or to choose based on recommendation and qualifications. There are lots of qualification options available for the instructors who take their career seriously, they may be a little more expensive, but you will find it a much nicer learning experience, and usually pass sooner because the instruction quality is high. At the end of the lesson you should be able to discuss what you have learned and your next goal, if not, what are you paying for?
 
 
 
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