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Girl in year sleeping around, advice? Watch

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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Hi,
    There's a girl in my year group that lost her virginity at 14 (2013). Since then she has had 5 sex partners of various ages, the most recent one is 18. She is now 16.
    Her relationships last around three months per partner, longest one was around 6.
    She's good academically and is not failing at any of her chosen subjects.

    She's starting to get a reputation with a few people that he is a "****" and "filth" etc. She's a nice girl and funny enough to have a laugh with. However, I think she's making the wrong life choices here.

    Her parent's don't know (I think) that she's not a virgin and defiantly don't know of her promiscuous nature. Apparently this is "common" now.

    I want the best for her and not to have regrets in later life. She is rather the alpha-female so any constructive comments would have to be tailored towards that!

    Feel free to propose any advice. She recently got intoxicated more than five within the last year. I've known her for over four years now. Never used to be like this, a shame really.

    Thanks for reading.
    • #2
    #2

    As long as she's not directly endangering herself or anyone else let her live her life how she wants to, theres plenty of worse things to worry about in the world than a girl enjoying herself. If she's still doing okay in school and is a nice enough person to speak to then she's still doing better than a large portion of the population...
    • #3
    #3

    Let her do what she wants, as the above post says, if she's not hurting anyone or herself, there's no issue. Her sex life has no relation to her worth as a person.
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    Are you actually the girl? heueueeheuehueh
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    None of your business.

    End of thread.
    • #1
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    (Original post by NishaaaR)
    Are you actually the girl? heueueeheuehueh
    Umm. No.
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    Don't tell her parents, let her make her own mistakes. Just make sure she's being safe, using contraception, etc
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    'I'm ok with you doing X, but I just want to make sure that you're safe' almost always means 'I'm not ok with you doing X'.
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    As long as she is happy, safe and giving consent, I don't see the problem. Would you be as worried if it was a guy who was doing the same as she is?
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    (Original post by Fibsy)
    As long as she is happy, safe and giving consent, I don't see the problem. Would you be as worried if it was a guy who was doing the same as she is?
    I see your point, thanks. I suppose it's because (normally) guys can do more damage to her than she could to them (pregnancy).

    If a guy was doing it I'll admit I probably would just go and accept it, voicing my two-cents and leaving it. I suppose you become attached to certain people more than others.

    Thanks for replying.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Hi.

    Just to let you know that she was with her boyfriend last weekend. Apparently they used no contraception. He didn't "pull-out" and therefore believes she may now be pregnant?

    I suppose you face your own consequences in life. Just thought it would be worth posting as a follow-up.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi.

    Just to let you know that she was with her boyfriend last weekend. Apparently they used no contraception. He didn't "pull-out" and therefore believes she may now be pregnant?

    I suppose you face your own consequences in life. Just thought it would be worth posting as a follow-up.
    Her mistake, not something that people who know her should be chatting about as if it were a public matter. Maybe suggest to her going on the pill or getting the implant?

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    Does she know you're posting all this stuff about her?
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    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by Fibsy)
    Her mistake, not something that people who know her should be chatting about as if it were a public matter. Maybe suggest to her going on the pill or getting the implant?

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Hi, thanks. She makes it almost public domain hence why I'm asking on here. She's seemingly alright with it being known for some bizarre reason. Personally I'd find it quite demorsalizing. I'll suggest the pill thing, I'm not in a position to look up the implant options. She's just a good friend, nothing more so would feel a bit uncomfortable asking her about that as I'm sure you can understand.
    Thanks again,
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by unprinted)
    Does she know you're posting all this stuff about her?
    Hi, no. The purpose of this thread being posted by "Anonymous" is that, as the name suggests that It can't be identified by anyone. I would have no problem identifying myself however, I could hypothesise that she may look up similar and would land me in an awkward position with her as denoted by my writing style and phrasing.
    As I've mentioned to the other user, she makes this information almost publicly available anyway. I'm not identifying her or I personally therefore I can't see how it would be a problem?
    I'm not sure what you may be inferring by your reply however I ensure you that this thread was created to ask for the best advice as a longtime friend to her, not to portray any slander or anything of that nature towards her. I respect her enough to ask for advice as I care for her wellbeing and not to see her either with a child or an STI. Surely that would justify my reasoning for asking on here, a forum where this nature or similar to is discussed every day?
    Thanks.
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    You're going 'I'm such a friend of hers, but WHAT SHE IS DOING IS WRONG !?!?!' when it's none of your business.
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    (Original post by unprinted)
    You're going 'I'm such a friend of hers, but WHAT SHE IS DOING IS WRONG !?!?!' when it's none of your business.
    She's doing NOTHING wrong! I second this. People have sex lives, nothing unusual about it or immoral.
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    Leave her to it, Love. You can't run other people's lives, either bring it up with her and say you're concerned or just live and let live.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
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    (Original post by Fibsy)
    She's doing NOTHING wrong! I second this. People have sex lives, nothing unusual about it or immoral.
    Hi, Previously what she was doing was illegal. However, looking over this I can understand now that she is 16 it's something to accept. I'm at the halfway point with agreeing but equally disagreeing with sex before marriage. As I said, after getting to know her and see her get older, it's something to have to accept that she's giving of herself to lots of different people.
    Thanks.
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    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by shreddingfish92)
    Leave her to it, Love. You can't run other people's lives, either bring it up with her and say you're concerned or just live and let live.
    Hi, thanks for putting it that way. I'll take your advice and, as you said to just live and let live. I suppose it's true how I can't police other people's lives for them. People get older and make different choices, I suppose being a friend is respecting her opinions. If that's what she chooses then who am I to argue?

    Thanks for the advice and look after yourself.

    Best wishes.
 
 
 
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