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1 Divorce, 2 tickets: A Graduation Nightmare - HELP! Watch

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    My parents divorced when I was about 7. My father seems to have some sense of entitlement in my life despite not doing half as much as my mum and step dad have. I have lived with my mum and step dad for most of the years of my life..

    This year I graduate, and can only buy 2 tickets to the ceremony (potentially more IF they are available weeks before graduation). My dad's wife has been putting pressure on me about who should be attending the graduation ceremony. And that my parents (mum and dad) should be the only two that attend.

    Ideally I want my mum and step dad to be there because I feel like they've done a great deal more for me. And I see my step dad as a father (obviously).

    If it turns out I can only get 2 tickets, how should I break it to my dad? I don't want to upset anybody but its inevitable.

    I've even considered not attending my own graduation so nobody will go. And even more - not letting my mum and step dad attend, so that I won't have anybody there.


    If anyone has had or is having a similar experience, please share your advice on how to deal with this situation!

    Thanks
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    It's a tough situation, but at the end of the day, it's up to you to decide who you want there at your ceremony. This is about you, and it's okay to be selfish sometimes. It's gonna be difficult to break it to your Dad, there's no easy way of doing it. Good luck, and don't miss your ceremony!
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    Think this must be a common dilemma Don't miss this important day. Go with your instincts and what your Mum would prefer I reckon.
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    (Original post by _Bright Eyes)
    It's a tough situation, but at the end of the day, it's up to you to decide who you want there at your ceremony. This is about you, and it's okay to be selfish sometimes. It's gonna be difficult to break it to your Dad, there's no easy way of doing it. Good luck, and don't miss your ceremony!
    Thank you! It would be a shame to miss it. I've been looking forward to this my whole life. Just thought my parents would be more understanding and not so manipulative i guess.. I'll just have to bite the bullet!
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    (Original post by Zarek)
    Think this must be a common dilemma Don't miss this important day. Go with your instincts and what your Mum would prefer I reckon.
    I would've thought so too but I havent been able to find many forum threads about it
    My mum would definitely prefer having her partner there, and so would I.

    Thanks for your reply!
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    I would maybe wait, and see if you can get more tickets? Then you won't offend anyone unless you absolutely have to.
    I don't want to jinx it but *usually* you can, but I know it depends.

    If you can only have 2 tickets, then take who you want to take. It's your graduation. My sister did the same, took her mum and stepdad and everyone was fine with it as they appreciated that although she loved her dad, her stepdad had been there for her more, helped to move her to uni etc.
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    Arrange to all go for a meal before or after graduation so that everyone can share your day :-) give the two tickets to the two that you felt supported you most but do try get the extras. Do any of your friends not want guests? Could you get two more that way? (Maybe take that friend for the meal too if you are close).
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    (Original post by LiquidGold)
    I would maybe wait, and see if you can get more tickets? Then you won't offend anyone unless you absolutely have to.
    I don't want to jinx it but *usually* you can, but I know it depends.

    If you can only have 2 tickets, then take who you want to take. It's your graduation. My sister did the same, took her mum and stepdad and everyone was fine with it as they appreciated that although she loved her dad, her stepdad had been there for her more, helped to move her to uni etc.

    Thank you. If i risk it and wait there's a good chance I won't be able to get any :/ Im guaranteed 2 thought if i purchase them as soon as they are released.
    Yeah definitely. My dad and his wife are pretty manipulative, though. They are constantly contacting me and saying things like "It would really upset me if I wasn't there as your father." Which I understand, but I feel like that's such an awful thing to say to your own child and making them choose like this :-(

    And my main problem is im struggling to find the words to break it to him!

    Thanks again
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    (Original post by Quilverine)
    Arrange to all go for a meal before or after graduation so that everyone can share your day :-) give the two tickets to the two that you felt supported you most but do try get the extras. Do any of your friends not want guests? Could you get two more that way? (Maybe take that friend for the meal too if you are close).
    That's a great idea, thank you! I'll ask around to see if anyone will have no guests and willing to give up their 2 tickets.

    A meal together, I wish! My parents don't get along, and their partners only make matters worse.

    Worst case scenario, I have to find a way to break it to my dad that I want my mum and step dad to be there. Anyhow, he could still watch the ceremony from another room....
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    I hope you get the extra tickets but ultimately go with what would be the best for you and it sounds like having your mum there would make you happiest.

    Maybe they could treat you by getting along for two hours, guilt trip them into being sensible adults for the duration of a meal. They may talk about your awesomeness and nothing else
 
 
 
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