How to tell family about wanting to change my name?

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raleighs
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#1
Report Thread starter 4 years ago
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I've wanted to change my name since I was 13 (I'm 17 now) and, after 4 years, have decided on what name I want. Most of my friends know what I want to change my last name to, and only one or two know I want to change my first name. However, my family don't know at all.

They are really accepting and always used the correct names when talking about my friends who have also changed their names, so I'm not too worried about them not using the right name or anything. I feel like it's a bit too much, saying that I want to change both my first and last name at once. First of all, I don't know how the hell I would tell them, and secondly I wonder if it would be better to change my last name first (because they would be more accepting of that, I think) and then later change my first name.

However, I want to get this done before I move out and go to uni, so I don't have to do the whole 'This is my new name, please use it' spiel at university. I also want my A Level results to say the name I prefer, not my old, legal one... Furthermore, I feel so disassociated from my old name that I don't know how much longer I can continue this facade.

I have no idea what to do, can someone help?
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claireestelle
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(Original post by raleighs)
I've wanted to change my name since I was 13 (I'm 17 now) and, after 4 years, have decided on what name I want. Most of my friends know what I want to change my last name to, and only one or two know I want to change my first name. However, my family don't know at all.

They are really accepting and always used the correct names when talking about my friends who have also changed their names, so I'm not too worried about them not using the right name or anything. I feel like it's a bit too much, saying that I want to change both my first and last name at once. First of all, I don't know how the hell I would tell them, and secondly I wonder if it would be better to change my last name first (because they would be more accepting of that, I think) and then later change my first name.

However, I want to get this done before I move out and go to uni, so I don't have to do the whole 'This is my new name, please use it' spiel at university. I also want my A Level results to say the name I prefer, not my old, legal one... Furthermore, I feel so disassociated from my old name that I don't know how much longer I can continue this facade.

I have no idea what to do, can someone help?
I think the best thing to do is just to come out and say you wish to change your whole name, my family wasnt particulalrly bothered when i changed my surname but then that was an addition rather than completely changing it . Getting two name changes in a row would just complicate things (you dont realise how many companies have your name until you need to change it and changing id and everything can get expensive) so if you're going to do it just do it all at once. Legally you dont actually need your families permission to change it now so if they wont accept it then you d still be able to do it anyway.
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raleighs
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Report Thread starter 4 years ago
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(Original post by claireestelle)
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Ah, I forgot about all those companies like my bank and doctor and whatnot. Okay, it'd make sense to do it all at once. Thank you for your advice!
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claireestelle
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(Original post by raleighs)
Ah, I forgot about all those companies like my bank and doctor and whatnot. Okay, it'd make sense to do it all at once. Thank you for your advice!
No problem, glad to help
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alohalily
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(Original post by raleighs)
I've wanted to change my name since I was 13 (I'm 17 now) and, after 4 years, have decided on what name I want. Most of my friends know what I want to change my last name to, and only one or two know I want to change my first name. However, my family don't know at all.

They are really accepting and always used the correct names when talking about my friends who have also changed their names, so I'm not too worried about them not using the right name or anything. I feel like it's a bit too much, saying that I want to change both my first and last name at once. First of all, I don't know how the hell I would tell them, and secondly I wonder if it would be better to change my last name first (because they would be more accepting of that, I think) and then later change my first name.

However, I want to get this done before I move out and go to uni, so I don't have to do the whole 'This is my new name, please use it' spiel at university. I also want my A Level results to say the name I prefer, not my old, legal one... Furthermore, I feel so disassociated from my old name that I don't know how much longer I can continue this facade.

I have no idea what to do, can someone help?
this is exactly how I feel I just couldn't put it into words, how did you tell them in the end? And did you do your last name and then your first name? Or both at the same time?
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