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Dated a girl twice but dunno what to do with it anymore Watch

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    Read it again :facepalm: :facepalm: 'you're so confident' she's giving you the cue Muppet kiss her already.
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    (Original post by whorace)
    You are the autistic one, she is clearly being playful and winding you up, she's not bad at it either.
    Naaah.

    She's definitely not doing that. Flirting with her is a chore as I feel like I'm flirting with a fish.

    P.S She only said I was confident retrospectively via text, not there and then.
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    (Original post by TorpidPhil)
    I have no idea. I don't know how anyone could tell when we don't know each other that much - we haven't even held hands so how would one know? I think we could be good friends that's for sure. But how can one tell if there would ever be anything more than friends? She does seem quite emotionally inert, but perhaps the problem is that I do too.

    I think I could be dating Nicki Minaj and I'd still have doubts as to whether or it is worth it. It's my ****ed up mindset that probably is the result of either continuing depression or just coming out of depression.
    What made you want to date her, what did you like about her to make you want to take the step?
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    (Original post by xobeauty)
    What made you want to date her, what did you like about her to make you want to take the step?
    Pretty much the fact that she decided she wanted to meet me rather than vice versa, which is nearly never the case. Especially with meeting someone online, girls online tend to be absurdly insecure and that's a no-no I've found. Our conversations before meeting for the first time were extremely casual and frankly boring. In fact, I randomly stopped responding to her texts after about a week or so of bothering to text once another daily because it was just boring. Then like a month later I saw her visit my profile on the dating site we met on and I sent her an apology for not telling her why I stopped responding. She said she agreed that the conversation felt forced and was dull but that it was a result of her being in the middle of some project so she was really busy and couldn't commit to more meaningful conversation. And then suggested meeting up with me. I was like, hmm, well, she sounds kind of desperate, but hey, it's just a date, what do I have to lose?

    Problem is, she doesn't like taking lead. I feel like I try and do some things to make her feel better but... it isn't really reciprocated and it's not like she's using me - it's not that overt, she just seems emotionally unaware or something.

    And then once we did meet we conversed rather well and confidently. Smiled a lot and enjoyed it more than dates I've been on with pretty much every other girl (although that's only 3 lol).

    And she's cute. Although I struggle to imagine her being sexy. She probably thinks the same of me though. I can definitely be sexy though. So that hesitation of mine shouldn't put me off.
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    (Original post by TorpidPhil)
    Pretty much the fact that she decided she wanted to meet me rather than vice versa, which is nearly never the case. Especially with meeting someone online, girls online tend to be absurdly insecure and that's a no-no I've found. Our conversations before meeting for the first time were extremely casual and frankly boring. In fact, I randomly stopped responding to her texts after about a week or so of bothering to text once another daily because it was just boring. Then like a month later I saw her visit my profile on the dating site we met on and I sent her an apology for not telling her why I stopped responding. She said she agreed that the conversation felt forced and was dull but that it was a result of her being in the middle of some project so she was really busy and couldn't commit to more meaningful conversation. And then suggested meeting up with me. I was like, hmm, well, she sounds kind of desperate, but hey, it's just a date, what do I have to lose?

    Problem is, she doesn't like taking lead. I feel like I try and do some things to make her feel better but... it isn't really reciprocated and it's not like she's using me - it's not that overt, she just seems emotionally unaware or something.

    And then once we did meet we conversed rather well and confidently. Smiled a lot and enjoyed it more than dates I've been on with pretty much every other girl (although that's only 3 lol).

    And she's cute. Although I struggle to imagine her being sexy. She probably thinks the same of me though. I can definitely be sexy though. So that hesitation of mine shouldn't put me off.
    ^ well excuse me.

    :rofl::rofl:

    Kinna sounds like your forcing to like her.go on a couple more dates maybe it takes a while for her true personality to come out and she won't act like such a weirdo. It can be her nerves.
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    (Original post by whorace)
    Read it again :facepalm: :facepalm: 'you're so confident' she's giving you the cue Muppet kiss her already.
    (Original post by xobeauty)
    ^ well excuse me.

    :rofl::rofl:

    Kinna sounds like your forcing to like her.go on a couple more dates maybe it takes a while for her true personality to come out and she won't act like such a weirdo. It can be her nerves.
    So I just told her tonight over Skype text that I wanted the relationship to move on (to put things simply). And she received it extremely well. In hindsight I'm really not sure why I made this thread or ever thought she wouldn't. I'm a pessimistic ******* is the only ****ing explanation. I even said on here objectively it couldn't have gone much better.

    However, I was right though Whorace because she said that she would definitely have freaked out if I had made moves on her in person without telling her this. For some reason she was convinced I couldn't possibly like her. So... She would have panicked and thought the worst of my intentions.

    Also she actually did not have a clue what I was talking about in that previous conversation we had. She literally didn't even think I found her attractive lol.

    Online dating seems to be plagued by very insecure women.

    But, hmph, we're off to the cinema now. Again. But next week as I've got a cold atm >_<

    Can't decide on what to go see though. Personally I want to see something romantic. Or just a rom com. I don't really like movies. But I just want to use the date to faciliate the thing moving forward. I'm kind of annoyed that I basically had to tell her that I wanted to kiss her because she is/was that clueless at picking up cues lol. But... I feel like things could move swiftly if I just go along with it.

    So my new question is this - What movie should I go see? Might make a new thread. But context is really important you see.

    I would watch Carol. How To Be Single is the far lighter option. I could handle the heavy, I'm not sure yet whether she could or not. Anyone got any other films they would recommend?

    Not the Revenant

    Downside is she now expects me to kiss her next we meet so to get the awkwardness out of the way for her I'm just going to kiss her as soon as we meet. And on her nose which I told her I thought was adorable. She's insecure. She needed the compliments :P
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    yeah not reading that.

    section your stuff using spollers and put it in another post.
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    (Original post by TorpidPhil)
    So I just told her tonight over Skype text that I wanted the relationship to move on (to put things simply). And she received it extremely well. In hindsight I'm really not sure why I made this thread or ever thought she wouldn't. I'm a pessimistic ******* is the only ****ing explanation. I even said on here objectively it couldn't have gone much better.

    However, I was right though Whorace because she said that she would definitely have freaked out if I had made moves on her in person without telling her this. For some reason she was convinced I couldn't possibly like her. So... She would have panicked and thought the worst of my intentions.

    Also she actually did not have a clue what I was talking about in that previous conversation we had. She literally didn't even think I found her attractive lol.

    Online dating seems to be plagued by very insecure women.

    But, hmph, we're off to the cinema now. Again. But next week as I've got a cold atm >_<

    Can't decide on what to go see though. Personally I want to see something romantic. Or just a rom com. I don't really like movies. But I just want to use the date to faciliate the thing moving forward. I'm kind of annoyed that I basically had to tell her that I wanted to kiss her because she is/was that clueless at picking up cues lol. But... I feel like things could move swiftly if I just go along with it.

    So my new question is this - What movie should I go see? Might make a new thread. But context is really important you see.

    I would watch Carol. How To Be Single is the far lighter option. I could handle the heavy, I'm not sure yet whether she could or not. Anyone got any other films they would recommend?

    Not the Revenant

    Downside is she now expects me to kiss her next we meet so to get the awkwardness out of the way for her I'm just going to kiss her as soon as we meet. And on her nose which I told her I thought was adorable. She's insecure. She needed the compliments :P
    Yay, your a go getter, good for you. Good luck with the smooches :lips:
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    Why did you even suggest a third date if you lost motivation ? Or was that after?
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    What I wanna know is who Trisha is... She just slid into both you and your 'girlfriend' 's dms
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    From your last few posts it seems perfectly clear to me that you're only into her because she's showing interest in you. That explains why you have very low motivation. Skimming through your original post, you don't mention anything about how you feel about her - it's always 'I think she's into me, because this and that'. You say nothing about what you like about her...

    Don't lead the poor girl on. Drop it.
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    (Original post by InadequateJusticex)
    From your last few posts it seems perfectly clear to me that you're only into her because she's showing interest in you. That explains why you have very low motivation. Skimming through your original post, you don't mention anything about how you feel about her - it's always 'I think she's into me, because this and that'. You say nothing about what you like about her...

    Don't lead the poor girl on. Drop it.
    Of course I like her.

    But why would my first post talk about that? Was trying to figure out signals or something in the first post, but tbh, even in hindsight I'm not fully sure what its purpose was.

    Jeez, the whole prospect of me making the OP is indicative of my liking her or I wouldn't have bothered - I would have just left it there. I think the mixed feelings really just come from me being pessimistic because I really am.

    I said it myself, I could be dating Nicki Minaj and I bet I'd still have my doubts. I just need a kick up the arse and a push forward so that I get on with something and realise actually, it works just fine and I will enjoy it because I worry too much about nothing.
    (Original post by anonymousm3)
    What I wanna know is who Trisha is... She just slid into both you and your 'girlfriend' 's dms
    What?
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    (Original post by Mystery.)
    Why did you even suggest a third date if you lost motivation ? Or was that after?
    I lost motivation afterwards due to her not seeing or understanding any of my flirting... Felt like I was talking to a robot. I literally had to tell her explicitly over text message of all things that I wanted to kiss her. And that actually was the optimal option here, in fact the only option. How does someone ever become so interpersonally obtuse that that is the case lol? That''s what put me off the most.

    But, she has been extremely busy recently and she is insecure. So, that really explains it together and I'm just going to give it a go anyway and see what happens.

    (Original post by xobeauty)
    Yay, your a go getter, good for you. Good luck with the smooches :lips:
    I don't know what go getter means in this context? But thanks haha :P
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    (Original post by TorpidPhil)
    Of course I like her.

    But why would my first post talk about that? Was trying to figure out signals or something in the first post, but tbh, even in hindsight I'm not fully sure what its purpose was.

    Jeez, the whole prospect of me making the OP is indicative of my liking her or I wouldn't have bothered - I would have just left it there. I think the mixed feelings really just come from me being pessimistic because I really am.

    I said it myself, I could be dating Nicki Minaj and I bet I'd still have my doubts. I just need a kick up the arse and a push forward so that I get on with something and realise actually, it works just fine and I will enjoy it because I worry too much about nothing.


    What?
    I am pessimistic and also have depression so we're more similar than you think. When I've liked someone properly, I've never had mixed feelings about it. The only time I've ever had mixed feelings was when I don't really fancy this person, or I've forced myself to like them but as a result of these mixed feelings it never worked out in the end.

    Also you're not doing yourself any favours by using Nicki Minaj :lol: If you're going to make a point of 'oh I could be dating x celebrity and I would still feel like this' then at least choose a decent celebrity
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    (Original post by InadequateJusticex)
    I am pessimistic and also have depression so we're more similar than you think. When I've liked someone properly, I've never had mixed feelings about it. The only time I've ever had mixed feelings was when I don't really fancy this person, or I've forced myself to like them but as a result of these mixed feelings it never worked out in the end.

    Also you're not doing yourself any favours by using Nicki Minaj :lol: If you're going to make a point of 'oh I could be dating x celebrity and I would still feel like this' then at least choose a decent celebrity
    I love Nicki Minaj
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    And now she asked me if I wanted to come back to her flat after we go to the cinemas.

    Of course I accepted.

    Suddenly I'm becoming more nervous though. **** just advanced quickly. But pfft. Even if she is the clingy type. THAT IS PERFECT. So I just need to remind myself to not have an arbitrary, unjustified fit of pessimism again.

    This is the day after we had a conversation about cooking and we came to the conclusion that she's good at cooking though. Bet she makes me something for dinner. And if it's awesome. Welp. She's obviously going after my heart through my stomach. Which, will probably work :P
 
 
 
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