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Bengali girl who wants to stay single forever. AMA. watch

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    (Original post by sunshine97)
    I definitely won't be. I've had this mind set for the last 3 years. For the past 4 months my mind was changed. Now I'm going back to following my mindset which I had for the past 3 years.
    Sorry if that came out wrong. What I meant was, whilst I support your current decision, this is something you'll sometimes think about in future, even when you're still at that time firm in wanting to remain single - from time to time you'll occasionally think about it, like a passing thought for example.

    We all have errant thoughts and contemplate in the back of our minds, nothing serious - happens all the time the more you grow and experience. Same with couples who will also from time to time think about life being single - again, normal. We all ponder various possibilities, like daydreaming in a sense. Even, and especially when we don't even realise we are.

    Not sure if that makes any sense to you, but there you go.
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    (Original post by Final Fantasy)
    Sorry if that came out wrong. What I meant was, whilst I support your current decision, this is something you'll sometimes think about in future, even when you're still at that time firm in wanting to remain single - from time to time you'll occasionally think about it, like a passing thought for example.

    We all have errant thoughts and contemplate in the back of our minds, nothing serious - happens all the time the more you grow and experience. Same with couples who will also from time to time think about life being single - again, normal. We all ponder various possibilities, like daydreaming in a sense. Even, and especially when we don't even realise we are.

    Not sure if that makes any sense to you, but there you go.
    I'm sorry my response came out harsh
    But I know what you meant. I can imagine myself pondering how my life would be if I wasn't single.

    But I think the same happens to couples too, where they may also ponder how their life would be if they were single instead. But overall being happy with their relationship.
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    (Original post by sunshine97)
    I'm sorry my response came out harsh
    But I know what you meant. I can imagine myself pondering how my life would be if I wasn't single.

    But I think the same happens to couples too, where they may also ponder how their life would be if they were single instead. But overall being happy with their relationship.
    No worries. And yep, that's pretty much how it goes as you say. Such is life.

    Wish you all the best and good luck in your future endeavours, in whatever you decide. It is your life after all, so be happy and content.
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    whats the reason behind this?
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    Hi5, fellow Bengali! :ahee:

    Not a question, but YOU DO YOU! It's totally up to you if you wanna be single or not. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
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    (Original post by sunshine97)

    Rofl :rofl: I don't know why I'm laughing so hard at this.

    But on a serious note, I'm going to break it to my parents I'm not going to get married at all. But when I start rejecting everyone for the next 5 years, after handing out my CV.

    By then it'll be too late to convince me to get married, since it's difficult to get married at an old age (late 20s lol :P).



    I definitely won't be. I've had this mind set for the last 3 years. For the past 4 months my mind was changed. Now I'm going back to following my mindset which I had for the past 3 years.
    Yeah you're right but my auntie is 32 and she still isnt married...and now she is in a bit of a crisis because she cannot find anyone that suits her needs or taste
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    (Original post by sunshine97)
    I said my reason on my previous post. I'm not saying this out of emotions, I have thought like this for pretty long. But my most recent and first crush has made me change my mind for a bit. After this heartbreak, now I'm going to follow through my original plan no matter what.

    Besides relationships seem pointless in today's society. Relationship is just a result of attachment created through chemical reactions in the brain, it's not as special as how society makes it out to be.

    Maybe in the caveman times it was needed to create new life. Now we have adoption and medical technologies for that if you choose to not be in a relationship.

    Also in the past when men mostly worked due to there mostly being manual jobs available thus leaving women to do the expressive role. Both of these roles were needed to raise children, therefore marriage were needed. Now both genders can carry out dual roles, therefore making marriage unnecessary.



    By then it'll be too late to convince me to get married, since it's difficult to get married at an old age (late 20s lol :P).



    I definitely won't be. I've had this mind set for the last 3 years. For the past 4 months my mind was changed. Now I'm going back to following my mindset which I had for the past 3 years.
    You can't help feeling attraction. As you said, it's a result of chemical reactions in the brain etc, and these reactions are pretty strong. They're also natural and uncontrollable.

    You don't just be in relationships for the sake of having children, it's more a life companion thing. Besides, in some respect there is still some need of a relationship in order to raise children. Your children will need a father figure, you may also need the financial support from your partner. Relationship doesn't necessarily mean marriage. I don't necessary believe in marriage, but I do believe in relationships. I think the marriage part is just a piece of paper, if you love your other half you don't need a piece of paper to allow you to live and enjoy your lives together.

    Getting married in the late 20s is not too late. Nowadays, lots of women choose to get married around 27-30 once they've settled down.

    Minds change all the time, to say you're not going to change it ever is just what you think right now.
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    (Original post by sunshine97)
    This thought got triggered 3 years ago.

    It's because I noticed that relationships in general tend to not work out / last long anyway. So it's pointless investing a lot of effort in building trust and bond in it, that is much greater than that of your own family who you share your flesh & blood. When it doesn't work out, it'll just lead to unnecessary disappointment.
    That family was a result of a relationship...

    If you get in a relationship, then one day you can start your own family who share your flesh & blood.
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    One thing that has been playing on my mind...

    Won't you be craving for the sexy time... :sexface:
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    (Original post by SAhm95)
    whats the reason behind this?
    I explained it to someone on the first page.

    (Original post by Mochassassin)
    Hi5, fellow Bengali! :ahee:

    Not a question, but YOU DO YOU! It's totally up to you if you wanna be single or not. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
    Hi5 back to you sister

    Haha thanks, I know my parents would disapprove. But I'm not going to let their opinions stop me ftom living my life the way I want.

    (Original post by luminarychild)
    Yeah you're right but my auntie is 32 and she still isnt married...and now she is in a bit of a crisis because she cannot find anyone that suits her needs or taste
    It must be hard for your auntie to find people now since alot of Bengali's her age are lrobably married by now. Hopefully she finds someone though, for her sake.
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    (Original post by luminarychild)
    One thing that has been playing on my mind...

    Won't you be craving for the sexy time... :sexface:
    Lol no XD I'm sure I'll be able to survive without it. Plus I never saw the point to it anyway.
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    I have a slightly similar mind to this but only god knows what will happen in the future
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    (Original post by kprime2)
    You can't help feeling attraction. As you said, it's a result of chemical reactions in the brain etc, and these reactions are pretty strong. They're also natural and uncontrollable.

    You don't just be in relationships for the sake of having children, it's more a life companion thing. Besides, in some respect there is still some need of a relationship in order to raise children. Your children will need a father figure, you may also need the financial support from your partner. Relationship doesn't necessarily mean marriage. I don't necessary believe in marriage, but I do believe in relationships. I think the marriage part is just a piece of paper, if you love your other half you don't need a piece of paper to allow you to live and enjoy your lives together.

    Getting married in the late 20s is not too late. Nowadays, lots of women choose to get married around 27-30 once they've settled down.

    Minds change all the time, to say you're not going to change it ever is just what you think right now.
    I think some people feel that they need a life companion, so they choose to have one. But I don't see the importance of it, if I feel there is more cons to it than pros. IMO I think this idea of having a life companion leading to happiness is overrated.

    Besides I don't think children NEED a father figure. I've seen cases where single mothers are able to raise children without any problems, than some families where there are two parents involved in their children's lives.

    Coming from a South Asian background, the idea of being in a relationship outside of marriage is shunned upon. My parent's would even hate the idea, they'd rather me be with nobody than be in relationships outside of marriage.

    Also It's usually too late for South Asian women, since South Asian men around the similar age tend to already have gotten married younger (mid 20s). Also if South Asian women are found to be unmarried till their late 20s, other South Asians are usually sceptical marrying them, because they assume just because no-one married them earlier, there must be something wrong with the woman.

    Hence why it's hard for South Asian women to marry late.

    (Original post by kprime2)
    That family was a result of a relationship...

    If you get in a relationship, then one day you can start your own family who share your flesh & blood.
    I won't feel like I'm missing out on anything since I wouldn't be having my own children.
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    (Original post by SAhm95)
    I have a slightly similar mind to this but only god knows what will happen in the future
    Are you referring to my reasoning from my previous post or just staying single in general?

    Yeah I guess. But I've had this view for a pretty long time. It would take a lot for me to change my mind.

    For example, my mind was changed briefly after my first but recent crush on my first male friend.
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    (Original post by sunshine97)
    Title says it all. PLUS I'm bored.
    I'm Bengali too! And I'm bored as well.
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    There are n sweets in a bag. 6 of the sweets are orange. The rest of the sweets are yellow.

    Hannah takes a random sweet from the bag. She eats the sweet.

    Hannah then takes at random another sweet from the bag. She eats the sweet.

    The probability that Hannah eats two orange sweets is 1/3.

    Show that n² – n – 90 = 0.
    Lol I am not the op but I did that exam last year (and got the question right)
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    (Original post by sunshine97)
    Title says it all. PLUS I'm bored.
    Are you not going to have children then? If so, don't you think that your life loses a bit of purpose since you aren't bringing up a family?
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    I see myself in a similar situation but I will be totally fine with it.
    (Original post by luminarychild)
    Yeah you're right but my auntie is 32 and she still isnt married...and now she is in a bit of a crisis because she cannot find anyone that suits her needs or taste
    (Original post by SAhm95)
    I have a slightly similar mind to this but only god knows what will happen in the future
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    (Original post by SeanFM)
    There are n sweets in a bag. 6 of the sweets are orange. The rest of the sweets are yellow.

    Hannah takes a random sweet from the bag. She eats the sweet.

    Hannah then takes at random another sweet from the bag. She eats the sweet.

    The probability that Hannah eats two orange sweets is 1/3.

    Show that n² – n – 90 = 0.
    lol @ all the noobs saying "N=10". Question is a show that. Not "what is N?" smh basic stuff
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    (Original post by sunshine97)
    Lol no XD I'm sure I'll be able to survive without it. Plus I never saw the point to it anyway.
    Only becuase you're inexperienced you need to be adventurous, go explore....once you have your first encounter you will go crazy for it :rofl:
 
 
 
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