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Would you still be friends with the person you rejected? Watch

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    If someone asked you out on a date or confessed their love to you and they were already your friend but you didn't feel the same way, would you still continue as friends like before or would you cut contact with them altogether?

    This was a discussion I had with my friend the other day and she said it depends on how close they were and what the situation was.

    I think I'd still be friends, but if they kept trying to win me over then I'd have to back away.
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    I'd continue to treat them as I usually would.

    However if they started to become clearly distressed/ obsessive or unable to see past the rejection I'd have to slowly phase them out. It wouldn't fair on them to keep them in my life if they can;t handle it, and it wouldn't fair on me to be put through the ringer for something I can't control.
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    Yes but that would never happen
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    I would feel a bit hurt by them. Probably there would be tension between us...
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    Yeah. I would probably feel a bit guilty and try to make it up to them somehow but I would be firm to make sure I don't accidentally lead them on
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    I feel weird but yeah I do
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    this happened to me last year, he was upset for a few weeks but now we are as close as ever and are still very good friends. It can work, they may just need some time to adjust and you just need to allow them the space to do that
    • #1
    #1

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_XaIuw6K6Q

    similar situation to me in a way, only problem is, whilst I would like to talk to said person, I havent spoken to her in 8 years (her birthday is coming up...)
    • #2
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    If its the other way round. If you get rejected by a girl you barely know.
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    I don't think friendship could recover after they 'fessed love for you, or vice versa. Would honestly just be awkward as feck.
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    (Original post by Blondie987)
    Yes but that would never happen
    what do you mean it would never happen ?
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    I would try to be, but it would depend on how they acted really. I would have an open conversation with them and try to reach a conclusion that was best for both people. It may be that it would involve taking a break from each other for a while, or just continuing as normal. Depends on the person.
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    The person who is 'friend zoning' has little to lose. Either they retain a valuable friendship or they don't and in that instance it's not a big deal for them as they are searching for a true soul mate. I think that once there's been a rejection the whole friendship is compromised and its best to move on. Conversely if the request to more things in a sexual way direction has not expressed then friendship can be maintained.
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    currently in this situation, i rejected a guy at work i was friends with and he made it very awkward at first but we're slowly becoming closer again
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    I had this situation crop up a few times in high school. I told them I saw them just as a friend and carried on treating them the same. They weren't happy but that's their problem.
    • #3
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    (Original post by UWS)
    If someone asked you out on a date or confessed their love to you and they were already your friend but you didn't feel the same way, would you still continue as friends like before or would you cut contact with them altogether?

    This was a discussion I had with my friend the other day and she said it depends on how close they were and what the situation was.

    I think I'd still be friends, but if they kept trying to win me over then I'd have to back away.
    Yes I would still be friends with them, and even try and help them find someone new.

    I'm in the reverse position in this situation where I was rejected by a friend. I have had to take a few steps back and create some distance. I think when I find someone new I will be able to restore the friendship back.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yes I would still be friends with them, and even try and help them find someone new.

    I'm in the reverse position in this situation where I was rejected by a friend. I have had to take a few steps back and create some distance. I think when I find someone new I will be able to restore the friendship back.
    I was in your position. I had asked a girl out, she shot me down and then was "friends" with me for a few weeks and then proceeded to ditch me when I left for a placement year. The friendship is no more.

    That's why I'm asking really, I guess it does depend on the rejector and the rejectee
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    Been in this situation before. I am fine being someone's friend in this situation, its usually them that can't bear to just be friends once they know that there's no chance of nothing more and then they cut off the friendship or ask for space

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    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by UWS)
    I was in your position. I had asked a girl out, she shot me down and then was "friends" with me for a few weeks and then proceeded to ditch me when I left for a placement year. The friendship is no more.

    That's why I'm asking really, I guess it does depend on the rejector and the rejectee
    I feel for you, brother! I am a female myself though.

    It does depend on the two people. What I've noticed is that sometimes when you show a bit of vulnerability, by telling them you like them, the other person can really react badly. I don't know why that is.
 
 
 
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