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My parents don't understand my point Watch

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    Sigh..Honestly..i don't know what to do anymore..Everything seemed so clear b4..but now i see my plans failing continously

    Basically i have got offers from my 2nd(unconditional) and 4th(conditional-interview) choices. It seems obvious to go with my 2nd best choice which has Better course recognition and is accredited. The only catch is that it is a 1hr 45m commute from my place of stay. I do not have an option to live on campus due to family reasons. So i can't convince my parents w.r.t campus accomodation. I gave up.

    My parents want me to go with the 4th choice cos it is 1hr 10min away.. But i dont want to bcos of the course reputation only.
    Ive been arguing with them about this for days now.. But they keep complaining that Im being unfair to them and acting stubborn.
    😞😔
    i dont know how to help myself anymore.
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    You have to do what YOU want

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    Don't let your parents hold you back, do what you think would be best for you
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    If you take the course you don't want, you'll spend the entire time resenting your parents.

    Be strong, explain it calmly but firmly that you ARE taking the course you want. It's your future, not theirs.
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    This is your future we're talking about. Explain to them how you will get much better job opportunities if you go to your 2nd choice and how this is important to you. You're already going to a university a little bit far from home (1h10) what's the problem in driving a few more miles?
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    Go for what makes you happy.
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    (Original post by missytwinpeaks)
    You have to do what YOU want

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    only if you can support yourself?


    (Original post by Tamako2410)
    Sigh..Honestly..i don't know what to do anymore..Everything seemed so clear b4..but now i see my plans failing continously

    Basically i have got offers from my 2nd(unconditional) and 4th(conditional-interview) choices. It seems obvious to go with my 2nd best choice which has Better course recognition and is accredited. The only catch is that it is a 1hr 45m commute from my place of stay. I do not have an option to live on campus due to family reasons. So i can't convince my parents w.r.t campus accomodation. I gave up.

    My parents want me to go with the 4th choice cos it is 1hr 10min away.. But i dont want to bcos of the course reputation only.
    Ive been arguing with them about this for days now.. But they keep complaining that Im being unfair to them and acting stubborn.
    😞😔
    i dont know how to help myself anymore.
    In this situation you have to make an argument which clearly blatantly tells them they're obviously in the wrong.
    not sure quite what's happening with the travel and accommodation and stuff... but from what it seems maybe you could state something about travel time and the qualification you'll get when you finish your course. (Assuming your parents are choosing the other uni which is 1h and 10 mins away because it's shorter and less distance to travel) Why would one travel a shorter distance for a worse course which you will get almost nothing out of compared to the course you could get plenty out of(1h 45 mins uni)? Clearly the evidence here points to the better uni. You could also make an analogy, (assuming the uni's cost is roughly the same) you could say why would one go to mcdonalds if it's 1 hours drive away when if you go 15 mins further you could go eat at a high quality restaurant? I dunno you have to make a clear convincing argument for your case and use analogy's accordingly where you can. hope this helps.


    Tbh if their brain capacity isn't enough to understand your argument then there's not much you can do about it :/, i guess you could make your argument simpler but that's about it
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    (Original post by Sernobrega)
    This is your future we're talking about. Explain to them how you will get much better job opportunities if you go to your 2nd choice and how this is important to you. You're already going to a university a little bit far from home (1h10) what's the problem in driving a few more miles?
    I have to change trains that will be my mode of commute..
    I can get the idea that my parents are worried about my safety..
    Thats why i am in such a dilemma and end up regretting my decisions
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    (Original post by Tamako2410)
    Sigh..Honestly..i don't know what to do anymore..Everything seemed so clear b4..but now i see my plans failing continously

    Basically i have got offers from my 2nd(unconditional) and 4th(conditional-interview) choices. It seems obvious to go with my 2nd best choice which has Better course recognition and is accredited. The only catch is that it is a 1hr 45m commute from my place of stay. I do not have an option to live on campus due to family reasons. So i can't convince my parents w.r.t campus accomodation. I gave up.

    My parents want me to go with the 4th choice cos it is 1hr 10min away.. But i dont want to bcos of the course reputation only.
    Ive been arguing with them about this for days now.. But they keep complaining that Im being unfair to them and acting stubborn.
    😞😔
    i dont know how to help myself anymore.
    Go with the one you want and live on campus - your lfe and your choice. Both are too far for a daily commute - you'll waste time you could be studying.
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    Why can't you live on campus?
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    (Original post by Shumaya)
    Why can't you live on campus?
    Becos of financial conditions.. But im not forcing them becos i undertsand that it cannot be helped
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    (Original post by Tamako2410)
    Becos of financial conditions.. But im not forcing them becos i undertsand that it cannot be helped
    You could get a student grant? Those tend to include money for living expenses.

    May I ask if your male or female? I've noticed that parents tend to be more wary of letting girls travel long distances than they are for boys.

    On another note though, if you're taking public transport to and from the uni, then I don't see what the problem is to much. It's not like they would be the ones taking you everyday.
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    (Original post by Tamako2410)
    Becos of financial conditions.. But im not forcing them becos i undertsand that it cannot be helped
    I obviously don't know your situation but aren't you eligible for a student loan?
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    spoilt brat
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    This may sound like a risky idea but why not purposefully **** up the interview for the 4th uni so they reject you? You have your 2nd choice as unconditional so you'd be fine. It makes far more sense to go for the unconditional anyway than to put pressure on yourself for the 4th conditional choice. It sounds like your parents are too busy trying to wrap you up in cotton wool than do what's best for you.
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    Go for the unconditional, it will take so much pressure off you come exam season. Also, why can't you get the maintenance loan to cover your accommodation? Everyone is entitled to the minimum, and surely if that is all you get then your parents must be well off enough to support you?
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    (Original post by peanutbuttercup)
    spoilt brat
    Idiot
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    (Original post by Tamako2410)
    Becos of financial conditions.. But im not forcing them becos i undertsand that it cannot be helped
    Calculate the cost of travel and add on the food [plus everything else] they'll buy you - I bet there's not much difference.

    I don't think it is about money ...
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    as long as youre the one paying for the train journeys and theyre just saying stuff because they dont think you can manage then you aren't being unfair to them, if THEY are paying for them I can see their point IF its more expensive.
    my work is 1.30 hrs away and I can tell you its so draining to travel there and back all the time, I don't know if I could do that just for classes so you may want to do a few trial runs down there to see if youre okay with it. do them in the morning to be there for 9.00am
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    (Original post by Tamako2410)
    Becos of financial conditions.. But im not forcing them becos i undertsand that it cannot be helped
    I'm not from the UK but I know that there's a grant for people with financial hardship. You can also look for bursaries or scholarships within your university, for example Imperial has a 5,000£ bursary, UCL and Southampton a 2,000£ one.

    Besides, depending on the course you can work part-time while studying...
 
 
 
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