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    I hate to have to admit this: but I am disappointed with my social life at uni.

    I'm in accommodation that's organised into flats of 5 with a kitchen that are very closed off from each other, making it very hard to meet others. There is no proper communal area - or at least not one that anybody ever uses - and the events organised by my halls are incredibly lame, for want of a better word. So for this reason I very early on made the mistake of hanging around only with my flatmates (all other girls). They are all lovely and we are close, having already signed the lease on a flat together for next year. However, I am finding myself really missing the mixed social group I had at school. Only 2 of my flatmates like to/ are old enough to go out and we only ever go on nights out together, on the weekend. We are sometimes joined by other friends but haven't been integrated into their groups properly as one of my flatmates is a medic and they seem to be unwilling to be friends with anyone else! Very occasionally we do go out together during the week but my flatmates seem to be often busy with work, and I am the only one that ever suggests doing things which most of the time never comes off. On top of this I have found over the months that I've been bonding less with my flatmates than a couple of them have with each other, and I'm not quite sure why I'm feeling so left out - I'm starting to think maybe they aren't the absolute besties I thought they'd be.

    Whenever I see pictures of friends here at the same uni or elsewhere in big groups having fun seemingly every day of the week I can't help but feel terrible about myself, as I would love to have a more wild party life and can't understand why I haven't found it at uni of all places. My accommodation does have a 'clique', some of whom I vaguely know from freshers, who seem to have great fun but they bonded over being smokers always outside in the courtyard for a fag, and I feel it's much too late to go and try and integrate into their group.

    I have as well made several other friends from my courses, but I feel ashamed to ask to tag along with their friends as I seem to be the only one who doesn't have the group of friends that I am wishing for. I do meet up with them outside of class as well, but again I have to make all the effort and I just feel that I haven't met many like-minded people that I truly click with yet - and it's already nearing the end of 1st year. I don't sit around doing nothing either - I have formed a band, and even joined a couple of societies but they hardly organise any events at all and nothing that particularly grabs me.

    Maybe this is just a paranoid 1st year problem and I'm hoping next year when I plan to make the effort to join more societies and others move into smaller flats that I'll feel less left out. But for the time being, I have a permanent case of FOMO. I spend far too much time inside the flat for my own liking and I have a feeling of dread that I've wasted my first year and it's too late to find a new group of mates to hang out with. I came to uni excited about all the people I was going to meet and form strong friendships for life, but now I'm left wishing I could just start over again and choose a different uni, where everyone seems to be having more fun than I am. Am I just complaining about nothing?
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    my social life at uni is sht too dw
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    hey which uni is this out of curiosity?
    I hope i haven't got too high expectations that are gonna be shattered of uni life
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    (Original post by MevMev)
    hey which uni is this out of curiosity?
    I hope i haven't got too high expectations that are gonna be shattered of uni life
    u need to change your settings for me to reply to ur message
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    (Original post by MevMev)
    hey which uni is this out of curiosity?
    I hope i haven't got too high expectations that are gonna be shattered of uni life
    Edinburgh. I would say to lower your expectations but perhaps change them - not all uni experiences are the same. And also, choose your accommodation wisely! This is so important - don't choose something with an antisocial layout like mine, proper halls are so much better
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    (Original post by fajita.and.friends)
    Edinburgh. I would say to lower your expectations but perhaps change them - not all uni experiences are the same. And also, choose your accommodation wisely! This is so important - don't choose something with an antisocial layout like mine, proper halls are so much better
    Thank you so much- studying at Nottingham
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    (Original post by SAhm95)
    u need to change your settings for me to reply to ur message
    lol i have no clue how to do that
    do u wanna just PM me
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    (Original post by fajita.and.friends)
    Edinburgh. I would say to lower your expectations but perhaps change them - not all uni experiences are the same. And also, choose your accommodation wisely! This is so important - don't choose something with an antisocial layout like mine, proper halls are so much better
    hey, could I ask what edinburgh accom you're in?? I've met my conditions and I'm starting in September as an art student. I keen to sort my accomodation and I'm game for sciennes/meadow court/warrender, however if you're in one of those halls and ar struggling to like make firm friends I'm not sure...I don't want to be stuck with like one group of friends who I only know because we live together you know? Sorry lol, feeling a bit anxious!! x
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    (Original post by fajita.and.friends)
    I hate to have to admit this: but I am disappointed with my social life at uni.

    I'm in accommodation that's organised into flats of 5 with a kitchen that are very closed off from each other, making it very hard to meet others. There is no proper communal area - or at least not one that anybody ever uses - and the events organised by my halls are incredibly lame, for want of a better word. So for this reason I very early on made the mistake of hanging around only with my flatmates (all other girls). They are all lovely and we are close, having already signed the lease on a flat together for next year. However, I am finding myself really missing the mixed social group I had at school. Only 2 of my flatmates like to/ are old enough to go out and we only ever go on nights out together, on the weekend. We are sometimes joined by other friends but haven't been integrated into their groups properly as one of my flatmates is a medic and they seem to be unwilling to be friends with anyone else! Very occasionally we do go out together during the week but my flatmates seem to be often busy with work, and I am the only one that ever suggests doing things which most of the time never comes off. On top of this I have found over the months that I've been bonding less with my flatmates than a couple of them have with each other, and I'm not quite sure why I'm feeling so left out - I'm starting to think maybe they aren't the absolute besties I thought they'd be.

    Whenever I see pictures of friends here at the same uni or elsewhere in big groups having fun seemingly every day of the week I can't help but feel terrible about myself, as I would love to have a more wild party life and can't understand why I haven't found it at uni of all places. My accommodation does have a 'clique', some of whom I vaguely know from freshers, who seem to have great fun but they bonded over being smokers always outside in the courtyard for a fag, and I feel it's much too late to go and try and integrate into their group.

    I have as well made several other friends from my courses, but I feel ashamed to ask to tag along with their friends as I seem to be the only one who doesn't have the group of friends that I am wishing for. I do meet up with them outside of class as well, but again I have to make all the effort and I just feel that I haven't met many like-minded people that I truly click with yet - and it's already nearing the end of 1st year. I don't sit around doing nothing either - I have formed a band, and even joined a couple of societies but they hardly organise any events at all and nothing that particularly grabs me.

    Maybe this is just a paranoid 1st year problem and I'm hoping next year when I plan to make the effort to join more societies and others move into smaller flats that I'll feel less left out. But for the time being, I have a permanent case of FOMO. I spend far too much time inside the flat for my own liking and I have a feeling of dread that I've wasted my first year and it's too late to find a new group of mates to hang out with. I came to uni excited about all the people I was going to meet and form strong friendships for life, but now I'm left wishing I could just start over again and choose a different uni, where everyone seems to be having more fun than I am. Am I just complaining about nothing?
    I go to uni in Edinburgh too! Different university tho I feel you, I have 2 people in lectures I sit with but I only see and talk to them in class as they have their own groups of pals. As well as a big group of people on my course inviting me to parties every now and then, but it's only cause I talk to a few of them but not much, I just feel they do it out of politeness but don't particularly want me there. But I really want to fit in with them
    . I'm just not trying so hard anymore, i'm finding it so much time and effort to try and get these people to like me more than they do. As well as since I still live at home, I've found it more difficult trying to find a group of pals like I had in school. I've found a couple people to share a flat with (still hunting and so much stress D: ) but I barely know them, I've been struggling to find people to share with. They seem super nice tho which I'm happy with, but again have their own groups of pals. So we're in a similar situation haha, you're not alone!
 
 
 
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