Basically, Ive been seeing this guy at work (im 19) and he has a girlfriend. He's extremely muscles and he's also 28. We've had sex 4 times and then he started saying he was having feelings for me and I was too and I started getting attached. All this escalated very quickly having already known eachother 8 months before all this has happened since beginning of January he says were 'seeing eachother' and we always cuddle loads after sex and have showers together after and there is serious chemistry between us.
But I don't know why I'm getting with him. He has a girlfriend and I know I just want and like the attention, and now he is ignoring me because this morning I said we shouldn't see eachother.
This is because I get embarrassed and nervous around him at work and we have only ever had sex when we have been drunk/tipsy and met up especially. But really I know I want his attention and affection and I only said it to start a pointless arguement and get him to say no please don't say that. It's so pathetic of me.
I'm also on a gap year before uni and bored of my office job where I don't work around people my own age and I miss being with people my own age who are mostly at uni so honestly I'm lonely. His attention and this whole situation has been a great distraction and made me feel wanted.
So pathetic but so true
He's not speaking to me now and I feel lost and bored and scared I've annoyed him.
What do yo guys think I should do? I know how absolutely ridiculous this stupid situation is, but I am interested as to what is seems like from another perspective.
Thank you. Please don't be too mean x
I think I'm crazy Watch
- Thread Starter
- 01-01-1970 02:00
- 04-03-2016 23:06
From an outsiders viewpoint, I'd firstly like to make the obvious statement that it's not nice that the two of you are going behind his girlfriends back. Now, I don't want to pin a lot of blame upon you as it is HIS girlfriend, but you knew that he was in a relationship before you started sleeping with him, right? She deserves to know the truth and it should come from him-- whether he tells her or not, she still deserves the right to know. However, I'm sure you know this anyway so let's move onto the other problem!
You have both admitted that there are feelings and he has stated that you're 'seeing' each other; and the fact that the has suddenly started to ignore you after you told him that you shouldn't see each other is a big pointer towards him not being satisfied with the thought of you not being there. Furthermore, the cold shoulder could be his way of succumbing to the rejection and possible termination of your relationship, maybe ? but! in my honest opinion, I'm sorta forced to believe that you two won't be able to fully achieve the type of relationship that you're desiring whilst his girl is still in the picture. You need to be straight to the point with him - ask him what he actually wants, and tell him what YOU want, truthfully.
I know you like the attention that he gives you & I know you feel as though you won't be able to replace it, however you will! You need to find something else that'll give you distraction and whilst you're on a gap year, why not push your boundaries a little? Do something that is out of your comfort zone! Take a trip to somewhere. You can't make another person your happiness. You have to do it yourself and you will Ps, you are not pathetic for liking attention from others
I hope everything works itself out soon. Hang in there XLast edited by Nays4y3r; 04-03-2016 at 23:08.
- 04-03-2016 23:13
He's not giving you attention because it's all going to his girlfriend, he's a sleaze who's getting the best of both worlds by sleeping with you and lying to his girlfriend and you're enabling him. I don't know what you expect from him, he's clearly not a nice guy and you're also obviously in the wrong for being in lived in him cheating. How would you feel in her position? If you want my advice, break it off with him and tell him to come clean to his girlfriend, although he probably won't, go on your gap year, get some life experience and a moral compass.