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going through a difficult time watch

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    i'm in my first year of uni, and it's not what I expected. I don't particularly like the group of 'friends' I've made and are meant to be living with next year. I miss my old friends and don't feel like I can make proper connections and be myself. ive become very withdrawn and feel as if I'm suffering with social anxiety/avoidant personality disorder. I've been trying to excercise/eat healthy and read up on all the facts, but I don't really know what to do in order to start feeling happier?
    I feel like I'm constantly putting myself down and thinking people won't like me, and thinking back to how happy I used to be and it just makes me feel really sad how much has changed I just don't want it to get any worse as it seems to be doing.
    can anyone offer any support or know any self help books/treatment I could look into? thanks
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    Have you considered talking to a counselor at your university about how you're feeling?

    You could also try, seeing as you think you might be suffering from SA or AvPD, talking to your GP and perhaps getting referred to a psychologist for CBT. There are medications you can take for social anxiety but I think CBT is better if you can get it.

    Would you consider that you perhaps have depression? Just reading about how you feel sad.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    Have you considered talking to a counselor at your university about how you're feeling?

    You could also try, seeing as you think you might be suffering from SA or AvPD, talking to your GP and perhaps getting referred to a psychologist for CBT. There are medications you can take for social anxiety but I think CBT is better if you can get it.

    Would you consider that you perhaps have depression? Just reading about how you feel sad.
    Hi, yeah i've been trying to register at a GP around my area but none of them are taking anyone else on

    I didn't realise that you could get medication for social anxiety, is that similar to depression tablets? As I didn't particular want to take them as i've heard there are bad side effects.

    I think because i've been quite unhappy at uni for a while now, it has sort of gone into depression yeah. Thank you for your help
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    (Original post by RosieSheree)
    Hi, yeah i've been trying to register at a GP around my area but none of them are taking anyone else on

    I didn't realise that you could get medication for social anxiety, is that similar to depression tablets? As I didn't particular want to take them as i've heard there are bad side effects.

    I think because i've been quite unhappy at uni for a while now, it has sort of gone into depression yeah. Thank you for your help
    I'm not really sure what to suggest with the GP...could you try talking to someone at university because it sounds really bad that you can't get one nearby. Either the disability department or the union's welfare officer might be able to advise you.

    Yeah, you can get a few different medications for social anxiety:
    1. SSRIs are often one of the first that gets prescribed, they are antidepressants but can also help with anxiety. You'd need to take them everyday for them to be effective. Tbh the side effects are usually pretty mild, but you can research yourself
    2. You might also want to look into trying a beta-blocker such as propranolol - these drugs are good for getting rid of the physical symptoms of anxiety, they block adrenaline pathways in the body so stop things like rapid heartbeat. you can take either every day or just when you feel particularly anxious
    3. Depending on how severe your anxiety is, you might be able to get a benzo such as diazepam. This often makes people *very* chilled out. You take them as needed, but they are pretty addictive.


    Have you already signed a contract with these people you said you're not really sure about? If not, you might be better off trying to find alternative accommodation.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    i'm in my first year of uni, and it's not what I expected. I don't particularly like the group of 'friends' I've made and are meant to be living with next year. I miss my old friends and don't feel like I can make proper connections and be myself. ive become very withdrawn and feel as if I'm suffering with social anxiety/avoidant personality disorder. I've been trying to excercise/eat healthy and read up on all the facts, but I don't really know what to do in order to start feeling happier?
    I feel like I'm constantly putting myself down and thinking people won't like me, and thinking back to how happy I used to be and it just makes me feel really sad how much has changed I just don't want it to get any worse as it seems to be doing.
    can anyone offer any support or know any self help books/treatment I could look into? thanks
    Hi, it sound very difficult.
    Have you tried making a list about why you came to uni- e.g. need it for your career, increase your independence etc.
    I did this for my homesickness and it really helped (I am in my 3rd uni year).
    Have you signed a contract yet or put down a deposit? if you haven't then don't follow through, say even if by email you can't share with them and try student housing again- there would be a random selection and you could like these new people- decide if it worth that gamble.
    What about people on your course? do you think you could become friends with them?
    And remember if you spend all you time reminiscing about the past it will be hard to move forward- it can be really hard making the first move but target e.g. a loner and you could find a good friendship there. Talk to your friends using video chat and stuff but limit these to once a day, then every other day.
    if there is a mentoring scheme where you help first years settle in try doing that and you will meet people without as much pressure. try going to a club that your interested in. These can be challenging to do but think of a way to put yourself out there like once a week it doesn't have to be overwhelming.

    hope its helped- PS i have a roommate that i didn't want to share with and she brings a lot of hassle and academic year-ish later i still regret it and wish i didn't share with her.
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    (Original post by Sabertooth)
    I'm not really sure what to suggest with the GP...could you try talking to someone at university because it sounds really bad that you can't get one nearby. Either the disability department or the union's welfare officer might be able to advise you.

    Yeah, you can get a few different medications for social anxiety:
    1. SSRIs are often one of the first that gets prescribed, they are antidepressants but can also help with anxiety. You'd need to take them everyday for them to be effective. Tbh the side effects are usually pretty mild, but you can research yourself
    2. You might also want to look into trying a beta-blocker such as propranolol - these drugs are good for getting rid of the physical symptoms of anxiety, they block adrenaline pathways in the body so stop things like rapid heartbeat. you can take either every day or just when you feel particularly anxious
    3. Depending on how severe your anxiety is, you might be able to get a benzo such as diazepam. This often makes people *very* chilled out. You take them as needed, but they are pretty addictive.


    Have you already signed a contract with these people you said you're not really sure about? If not, you might be better off trying to find alternative accommodation.
    Yeah, i've been trying to register still, i've rang up the NHS number, but still can't find find a GP to register at:/ okay yes I might ask about medication then when i finally get registered somewhere and see what they suggest. I just feel really awkward talking to people about it other than my close friends and boyfriend.

    Yeah i've already signed the contract with them, it was really early on, i'd only been at uni for about a month and a half. So i've since decided i don't want to live with them:/ but not sure i can do anything about it now since i have already signed the contract.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah, i've been trying to register still, i've rang up the NHS number, but still can't find find a GP to register at:/ okay yes I might ask about medication then when i finally get registered somewhere and see what they suggest. I just feel really awkward talking to people about it other than my close friends and boyfriend.

    Yeah i've already signed the contract with them, it was really early on, i'd only been at uni for about a month and a half. So i've since decided i don't want to live with them:/ but not sure i can do anything about it now since i have already signed the contract.
    In the meantime if you can't find a GP to talk to, you could try the university counseling service - I guess you could use it as practice before talking to an actual doctor? I found that it's easier to open up and get proper help if you can get some practice in beforehand. It's great you're talking to your boyfriend and close friends, I hope they're able to at least listen if they can't give advice. But yeah, it's often good to share problems with other people.

    Oh right, that makes things a little more messy. Have you thought about advertising the room on gumtree or spareroom to find someone to take your place? If not you may have to bite the bullet and lose your deposit if you really don't want to live there. If you're gonna be miserable for a year it might be worth it.

    Sorry if this isn't very helpful but good luck with sorting things.
 
 
 
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